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I really let myself down

Posted 8th November 2011 at 12:17 by warmness

I went to a suprise 60th birthday party and half way through people kept gettting me up to dance. The music was great I just felt really awkward standing up dancing with a crowd of people, most of them were males which made me feel even more timid. I really wanted to enjoy it just like everyone else for once. My family got dragged away because I wanted to leave so I wrecked their night too
I just feel like I really let myself down
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people who just use me.

Posted 21st October 2011 at 06:06 by mhealer3

hi friends,
it's been great having your posts 2 read & reply 2 during this difficult time with my mother.
also, i don't want to be friends with this one girl anymore-- but
she just won't go away easily. i think she likes me cause i do things 4 her & know a lot of stuff that she needs 2 know. in other words-- she's just using me & i'd like 2 politely get the heck away from her.
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Something you wish you could tell someone...

Posted 21st October 2011 at 05:52 by mhealer3

Quote:
Originally Posted by mhealer3 View Post
i already told everybody what i needed 2 tell them &
they couldn't care less.
i don't think think the people in my life are decent people
or they would have aplologized
2 me 4 all the shit they've done 2 me.
apparently i just wasted the last 25 years.
i would like 2 go back in time & tell myself i'm not a loser like my mother told me.
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Social Anxiety When You Were A Child

Posted 21st October 2011 at 05:36 by mhealer3

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Originally Posted by mhealer3 View Post
so true, & i thanku 4 sharing.
myself, i was not liked by my mother, & had 2 pretend it didn't bother me.
also had 2 fend 4 myself with the bullies @ school (for grades7,8 & then @ my highschool it started all over again--for 2 more years)!!
boys tortured me & i just felt like i was burning inside from the terror of going to school.
still, i went 'cause i didn't know i had any options.
college was impossible until i
...
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why so picky & 'gotta-be-perfect'?

Posted 13th October 2011 at 04:54 by mhealer3

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Originally Posted by mhealer3 View Post
lately it's been very upsetting to me when little things go wrong.
i'm sure i'm overreacting. but why do i expect so much?
i don't like being demanding, but i obsess about the details.
how can i stop this?
am i acting the same miserable way that my parents acted toward me?
God, please help me--i don't want to be a nit-picky critical person anymore.
i'm especially hard on myself.
i pray i can learn 2 enjoy
...
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