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The importance of Structure

Posted 26th August 2014 at 01:57 by iTz0kt0Bu

Today, as it was Bank holiday I got a day off work. Despite not really liking the current job I do that much, I admit that most weekends I actually feel worse. Despite feeling drained after work, I do feel a sense of satisfaction that I haven't just wasted my day away and also feel like I deserve to be able to relax after a day of work.

I put the cause of my depressing weekends to the fact that I have a lack of structure on weekends when I'm not working. Not doing much apart from procrastinating and wasting most weekends on the internet causes me to overthink and concentrate on the negatives which doesn't help my anxiety.

Today has been a typical weekend day. I got up, had some breakfast and got ready for the day but ended up spending the majority of my time on the internet. I felt bad most of today, it was mostly due to constantly looking inwards and partly cause I have to tell my boss about how I don't want to do the apprenticeship he offered me. I'm still thinking about the situation to be honest although I do feel a bit more certain in my decision thanks to a thread. It's just scary what might happen after that I guess.

Like [URL="http://youtu.be/t_Kd5ZER-ak"]this guy[/URL] says in his video, I think I need to add a bit of structure to my weekends even though I wouldn't want to. I was planning on going gym this weekend but kept on putting it off due to anxiety and uncertainty. I hate to say it, but I have had thoughts of canceling my membership. Maybe I might get one session with a personal trainer, it depends if my mind tells me to cancel the membership or not, in the next few weeks. I am interested in being fit though as I feel exercise might help me feel good. I don't have much experience of exercise or sport though.

This week is going to both be interesting and nerve-wrecking with telling my boss the decision of not feeling I want to do the apprenticeship.

I can do something about the depressing weekends I guess. I am going to try and add a bit of structure to the weekend. I'm thinking I shouldn't set something that feels hard for me, as a planned thing to do next weekend morning. Having a household where no one speaks to each other kind of doesn't help the house feel like a happy place.
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  1. Old Comment
    Debs28's Avatar
    Hey I can relate. It's hard though. Today is my dy off work and I promised myself I would do a list of things. I know they would have made me feel better if I would have done them too but doesn't look like it's going to go that way. I read somewhere that the best way out of this is just to do something but isn't at exactly what the problem is lol. Hope things went well with your boss xx
    Posted 27th August 2014 at 15:46 by Debs28 Debs28 is offline
  2. Old Comment
    Yeah, I know what you mean. I wonder if we would do things in or structure if they were things that don't involve that much anxiety.
    Posted 29th August 2014 at 18:37 by iTz0kt0Bu iTz0kt0Bu is offline
 

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