Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Posted 20th November 2014 at 23:05 by indigo777
[B][I][SIZE="3"]Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should BURN and RAVE at close of day;
RAGE, RAGE against the dying of the light.[/SIZE][/I][/B]
I went to the cemetery on Monday as it was the 1st anniversary of my mothers death. It brought back a lot of memories( not always good)of past events. If you have known someone almost every day since you were born and then they vanish its bound to have an effect. I keep thinking of her being alive when the Luftwaffe were flying over England, of hearing the speeches of Winston Churchill on the radio as a child and also of my childhood memories of Christmases past. I recently found a mothers day card I made for her at school when I was about 6 which she had kept all this time along with birthday and Christmas cards.Memories make a person and one day they are gone, sometimes they vanish slowly as they age as they did with my mother until they are almost back to being a child again needing help for everything from going to the toilet to being fed. Gone forever. I keep thinking of things I should have asked her about our family history and her past but now its too late. She would have loved to have known that her humble poor family were once related to a noble who owned castles and came over with William the Conqueror but I only found that out last year.I still think of things to tell her when I get home and then remember there is no one there anymore. Perhaps it would be easier for me if I had of been normal and had a family of my own for help and support but now thats too late as well. She never did get any grandchildren despite having 3 children of her own. Evolution wins(again).
Old age should BURN and RAVE at close of day;
RAGE, RAGE against the dying of the light.[/SIZE][/I][/B]
I went to the cemetery on Monday as it was the 1st anniversary of my mothers death. It brought back a lot of memories( not always good)of past events. If you have known someone almost every day since you were born and then they vanish its bound to have an effect. I keep thinking of her being alive when the Luftwaffe were flying over England, of hearing the speeches of Winston Churchill on the radio as a child and also of my childhood memories of Christmases past. I recently found a mothers day card I made for her at school when I was about 6 which she had kept all this time along with birthday and Christmas cards.Memories make a person and one day they are gone, sometimes they vanish slowly as they age as they did with my mother until they are almost back to being a child again needing help for everything from going to the toilet to being fed. Gone forever. I keep thinking of things I should have asked her about our family history and her past but now its too late. She would have loved to have known that her humble poor family were once related to a noble who owned castles and came over with William the Conqueror but I only found that out last year.I still think of things to tell her when I get home and then remember there is no one there anymore. Perhaps it would be easier for me if I had of been normal and had a family of my own for help and support but now thats too late as well. She never did get any grandchildren despite having 3 children of her own. Evolution wins(again).
Total Comments 4
Comments
-
I'm going through the same thing and it sure isn't easy. My Mum didn't get any grandchildren either but I don't think she minded- she always did prefer cats.Posted 20th November 2014 at 23:19 by Belinda 
-
Thanks Belinda, I hope you are coping.
Posted 21st November 2014 at 22:38 by indigo777
-
Sat here reading your post, made me cry. Touching stuff.
My mother died end of last year and much of what you said rings true. Take care.Posted 26th December 2014 at 17:01 by Mo34
-
Thanks Mo. Things like this are hard to deal with. Take care of yourself too
Posted 26th December 2014 at 21:21 by indigo777
