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Social isolation? Is integrating really as easy as simply jumping out of your familia

Posted 21st August 2014 at 22:47 by iTz0kt0Bu

At work, so far the collegues have been nice and I bond with one of my collegues.

Not to say I like my job though, I'm considering changing jobs.

But one thing that my collegues seem to find surprising is how I don't know popular films or famous wrestlers. Yeah, I know not everyone is into the same things; but when you don't know the things that everyone else seems to know it can feel like you are a freak, don't know your countries culture, don't know how to act, where you stand with others, ultimately you can feel lost and unstable.

Getting rid of the out of sync feeling isn't as easy as stepping out of the comfort zone as some internet advice sometimes points out. The feeling of social isolation can be a much deeper cut than simply not talking to others. For me it seems my isolation is a result of growing up and not knowing many people, not mixing with the kids on my block, having a mum that also seems socially isolated, disconnection from family. Right now it's like my household knows no one, it's like being stuck in the bubble of cultural isolation.

However, that's not to say that I can't relate to anyone at all on a relatively popular interest.
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  1. Old Comment
    You're not alone, got a friend who is exactly the same, even as far as despises popular. Also guy on panel show Ian hislop famous for no knowledge of popular culture.
    Posted 21st August 2014 at 22:54 by affluenza affluenza is offline
  2. Old Comment
    black_mamba's Avatar
    It depends if you rely on pop culture as a source of conversations. I know many people who openly reject pop culture and aren't embarrassed to not know latest films, pop stars etc. but they have no problem continuing to be sociable.

    I had a similarly isolated childhood to you, and it took many many years of hard work to shake the feeling of being different/worse than everyone else. I learnt to be gently curious about the things people are passionate about. Not saying you absolutely should do this but it's one option to try.

    So for example if someone talks about a film you've never heard of, investigate: ask them what the story is, when they first saw it and how did they react? etc. I guess you have to be genuinely a bit curious about it before asking questions, because it probably comes across as disingenuous if you fake it.

    You will feel more connected to what it was that made this piece of culture so memorable, even if afterwards you decide you're still not iinterested in it, plus you'll have had an enlightening conversation and perhaps bonded a little with another human being.
    Posted 22nd August 2014 at 13:13 by black_mamba black_mamba is offline
  3. Old Comment
    Keep at it man. Keep on that treadmill because eventually you will be where you want to be. The world becomes a better place when you bring your best version of yourself to it.
    Posted 23rd August 2014 at 18:10 by buttonlane buttonlane is offline
 

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