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My life feels like a mess right now?

Posted 9th October 2018 at 02:54 by mutedsoul

So prior to my life right now of doing an access course and trying to find decent temp work I had a permanent job as a housekeeper. My aunt at the job pushed and persuaded me to do more saying that housekeeping and kitchen portering was too low of an aim for me, a guy who was educated in Britain. And tbh, I agree it's anxiety that influenced me to aim for such jobs.

Right now I am doing an Access course in Social Science and trying to find decent part time work. My life actually feels...
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A few confessions of a Socially Anxious male

Posted 15th September 2018 at 23:27 by mutedsoul

So I live in a council estate. I grew up there but never played outside. As a result, mixed with bullying growing up, I am scared or anxious of certain people on the estate and avoid certain areas.

Recently though I have began challenging my fear, since rationally it is an irrational one. Today I walked past a group of male youths who hang around in a corner of the estate. They look intimidating, like roadmen, but they can't be that bad. I got the feeling that they spoke about me...
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A New Chapter + things I learnt from my colleagues.

Posted 9th September 2018 at 04:16 by mutedsoul

I left my job last Thursday to go to induction day at my new college where I will be studying an Access course in Social Science.

I learnt a lot from my uni dorm housekeeping job. Not that much when it comes to the job, but a fair bit about people. I didn't make many friends there but did make a fantastic one I will call my aunt.

My aunt was the opposite from me loud, happy, funny, assertive, relaxed and very good at reading and getting on with people. She wasn't afraid...
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You can't please everyone

Posted 14th July 2018 at 16:51 by mutedsoul

So at work I thought I had made good friends with this person who is the complete opposite to me. I really liked her and when we first got on, she helped my confidence a bit as it seemed like she noticed me, was interested in my well being and didn't judge me for being in a bad mood as most people do. She also use to tell me that she would invite me to her house and that I am like her nephew.

Fast forward to this week and it's like she never eats lunch with me again. I have noticed...
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Self Acceptance

Posted 11th June 2018 at 23:42 by mutedsoul

Over the weekend, Saturday, I felt depressed and down on how it seems like I can't connect with people and how it had seemed that way as a kid. I was thinking I must be autistic or something. The thought was so strong in my mind that I felt I had to let a colleague that I am comfortable with know.

I thought the message was weird I pointed out how I think I may have autism but also asked how her day was and that I would not send "depressing"posts again. After I thought,...
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