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Old 2nd February 2012, 23:05
Johnni Johnni is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2006
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Default Re: Why aren't you in a relationship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Progress
Great question. When I was a kid I began to get unhappy with who I was. The things I liked weren't 'cool' so I wasn't cool. I wanted to be like the cool kids but wasn't because that just wasn't what I was like. So I was constantly trying to be someone different which is never going to work. Consequently I was attracted to the girls these other guys went out with but wouldn't stand a chance because they were not my type. You might say they were out of my league which might have some truth, but I think it's much more true (and more helpful) to say they were not my type. So what I need to work on now is to be more comfortable with the 'real' me and I'm far more likely to find the right match for me. This also explains why I split up with my last (and only) girlfriend. She did not quite fit in with the over inflated view I had of myself. But she was a perfect match for the 'real' me.
I think it's good that you can understand that it was more that the girls werent your type rather than just cos they were out of your league. So you wanted to be like the cool guys and thus wanted to be with the type of girl they went with also i presume.
I havent really thought about how my personality may play in me finding a partner. I havent really seen my personality as a stumbling block but then again havent really chatted up women who can then reject me maybe cos im boring etc lol. At school i hung arond other geeky kids yet i was also good at most sports so would also hang around with the 'jocks' so to speak.
But i do think i have to be more comfortable with the 'real' me however im finding it hard to know which one is me as i said in the thread a few pages back, its quite confusing as i act differently around different sets of people (some shy, some not) however thats more to do with how long i have known them for.

Ever think of trying it again with your ex or she taken now?
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