I hate when these ****ed up feelings take me over and make me feel and act like I'm crazy. I'm so ashamed of this shit. Being consumed by jealousy and paranoia and feeling like everybody despises and wants rid of me. I'm sick of craving reassurance and affection but not getting it, even though I also know I'd not be able to trust anyone who showed me any anyway. I feel so disgustingly weak and pathetic and it's no wonder nobody wants me. I just want to be free of this
