[Laurel]

you haven't inflicted anything, come on Fanta you can get through this. It's not your job to control everything, to manage every aspect of yourself so noone can see your troubles. Relax. You are in immense pain, and you're are troubled looking in every direction how to solve it. You got to look after yourself like a wounded animal. Pain isn't like the world of computers that you can just press a button and switch it off. You got pain, you got to look after it, nurse it.