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Originally Posted by esarempee
If people are saying they are ok with being alone, why are they here?
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A couple of suggestions:
1. Being OK being alone is not the same as being lonely. Like you I have one friend. Most of my life has been spent 'alone' (despite two marriages!) and I've been OK with that until recently, when I've suddenly found myself being incredibly lonely for the first time in 30-odd years.
2. I have worked really hard to become socially isolated. I thought it was the best way to avoid my distressing symptoms. Yes, people say we are 'social creatures' but I was determined to prove them wrong. I have proved them right and me wrong.
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Is going on Shy/SA meetups a good idea? won't we all be comparing levels of anxiety?
Thinks "look at him/her she's not shy, has no problem talking, what he/she doing here?"
or is that just me?
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I think this very much depends on how self-aware, insightful, judgemental and compassionate the attendees are or are not. If one understands one's own SA one knows people adopt various coping strategies: for example, they can manage to get through a 2-hr meet-up and then collapse into tears or a bottle of scotch when they get home.
There is comfort to be had in meeting with people who already know you suffer some mental health problems because a) you don't have to explain it and b) they should (see above) understand why you're maybe being that little bit 'different' or 'unusual', and cut you some slack or take trouble to engage with you in a sensitive manner.
Whether that's what meetups are actually like, I have no idea!