[Shy1987]

I saw this thread and thought I will reply.



1.) How does your BPD affect you?
•I feel my self identity isn't very strong. I sort of have a detached feeling and emptyness inside. But I am trying to socialise more and find out what I'm interested in. I don't know what I want to do with my life. I feel that I'm always the odd one out.
• I find romantic relationships difficult. I have low self esteem and get paranoid about my partner leaving me. In the last relationships I ended it a few times because I thought she would be better without me. But then I would realise my mistake and try and make up the next day.
•I find it hard making friendships because I worry people don't like me too much and I'm not actually sure how friendships work
I get bad depression and sometimes it stops me doing a lot of things
•I don't self harm which is good. I do over eat at times and can impulsively shop
• I obsess over social situations worrying if I said/did the right thing and if a person likes me or will I get rejected again
• as well as not self harming I don't get angry outbursts or have an anger problem. I believe I have quiet bpd where most of the anger is internal and at myself.

2.) How was the process of getting diagnosed?
I felt bad for years but just put it down to social anxiety and depression as did the doctors. I actually had a sort of break down last May and ended up in a mental health hospital for nearly a month. On leaving I got an official diagnosis of bpd and social anxiety.

3.) Have you told people IRL about it? How did they react?
Yes I tell people and I worry they don't know much about bpd and make bad assumptions about me. My mum disowned me after getting my diagnosis

4.) Have you found any useful ways of coping and managing symptoms?
Distraction helps when I'm feeling bad I will try and read or do self care.
I have just started group dbt therapy.
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