Meetup.com

[migster]

Calling on everyone who has used meetup.com in the past to share their experiences!

What was it like? Please describe how meetups take place. Were people receptive and welcoming or were there already established groups? Was it well organised and who was in charge? Did you find it useful and was it helpful for your condition?

Please share!

[Indigo_]

I've attended five or six in the past few years. They were all positive experiences Some people already knew each other, some didn't but all were included. They were all well organised and were organised mostly by someone who had a lot of experience in organising meets. I went to several coffee meets, a picnic in the park, lunch in a restaurant and an Escape Room meet, the last one I organised

[hollowone]

RE migster

What was it like? Please describe how meetups take place. Were people receptive and welcoming or were there already established groups? Was it well organised and who was in charge? Did you find it useful and was it helpful for your condition?

In all my experiences, everyone's been lovely and welcoming for most the events I've attended, and I've made new friends, mostly older than me, I've not experienced any cliquishness at all in any of the events I've attended.

RE

Did you find it useful and was it helpful for your condition?

Yes it's definitely useful, it's valuable social experience. It's certainly great practice in meeting new people even if you don't meet the types you're hoping to.

The only issue with the local meet-up scene in my area is the one that happens regularly doesn't give enough opportunity to talk to new people (a pub quiz on a Monday), you don't get the chance to get to know people and, people shoot off as soon as it's over. Apart from that, it's been positive as far as starting conversations with people and getting to know the regulars is concerned.

If you're contemplating it, try an event that takes your fancy and turn up. Usually the host will mark the table with a sheet of paper with the name of the event. Here's a great article that might answer your concerns
https://www.succeedsocially.com/meetup

[migster]

@gregarious_introvert:

So... you attend meetups and are even an organiser yourself. Wow. Why are you on here then? LOL Seriously, what aspects of SA do you have issues with? I am struggling to understand how you could be classed as an SA sufferer if you can meet up with strangers and even play the role of organiser with a group of people you either hardly ever met or never been with at all.

Some of the meetups you mentioned sound really appealing; I'm thinking of weekends away, trips abroad or social drinks. Those are the sort of things I would really love to start doing. Very happy for you that you are at that level!

Would you say that it was the exposure combined with what seems to transpire from your posts as a desire to improve yourself and belief that you can do it, that has allowed you to be where you are now? How much progress have you made, by the way? As in, how badly did you suffer from SA?

Slightly tangential question: what sort of meetups do you organise? You mention anxiety sufferers in your last paragraph so I'm wondering whether you organise meetups related to SA/GA.

[migster]

@hollowone:
@tigerlily:

Thank you for your reply (and the informative link, hollowone)! Couple of questions, if I may: how much of a positive impact has attending meetups made on your SA? In what ways did SA impair your social life before? How long ago did you start attending meetups?

This topic genuinely fascinates me. Thanks again to all of you!

[migster]

Oh, seeing as I'm firing off questions in all directions: what do you guys think of drop-in group sessions ran by the NHS? Are they effective at all? Never been to one myself but thinking of attending one weekly even though the only benefits I see myself deriving from the experience are from helping others.

Apologies for all the questions!

[Velcro-Touch]

I joined Meetup in march I don't want to get to dramatic and say it's changed my life but its definitely improved it, I attend a fitness class up to 3 times a week then week go for food and drinks after, gave me a chance to meet people my own age who are into my kind of thing. Everyone is really friendly they recently went a weeks holiday together to avimore, sadly I had to work. They invite me along to stuff outside of the group like days out and parties

Socialising more and exposing myself to eating out and stuff has really helped me

Generally Meetups with social anxiety don't work everyone is too shy or scared, it's better to find outgoing people and feed off their energy in my opinion. I got a fresh start with these people no one knew me when I was worse.

It's tough to find a group in your area that is frequent and the same people always go so you can build relationships but that's what I found.

There are cinema groups, fitness groups, geek groups, dog waking.....

Just try it if you don't like it you don't have to go back, many people attend and you never see them again for whatever reason

[Indigo_]

Originally Posted by Velcro-Touch

Generally Meetups with social anxiety don't work everyone is too shy or scared, it's better to find outgoing people and feed off their energy in my opinion. I got a fresh start with these people no one knew me when I was worse.

This hasn't been my experience at all. All of the meets I attended were anxiety meets. There were quieter members in the group sure, but most were able to chat and we had some good conversations It made me feel much more at ease, knowing I was with other people who had experienced or were experiencing anxiety.

[Velcro-Touch]

Originally Posted by Tiger_Lily

This hasn't been my experience at all. All of the meets I attended were anxiety meets. There were quieter members in the group sure, but most were able to chat and we had some good conversations It made me feel much more at ease, knowing I was with other people who had experienced or were experiencing anxiety.

That's good, I think Glasgow has one with some regulars, maybe 8 or 9 people go fortnightly, but with 500 people in the group attendance isn't great

250 member in the Edinburgh group, yet to have a successful Meetup it's been running for over 6 months

Maybe I should become an organiser of the Edinburgh one

[KookyBlue]

I'm off to one tonight,a pub quiz,haven't been to a meet in ages so trying to get back out there and going to them again.

[migster]

Hi Gregarious_introvert. Thanks so much for your very descriptive reply; I so very much appreciate it. It is surprising just how much strength and motivation I derive from posts such as yours, which I have found to propel me forward and eventually allow me to deal with my issues. I get your point about the small successes and building on them. I suppose that is exactly what has been happening to me since I have decided to force myself to "get out there" (as it were) and confront my fears and issues head-on.

Could I possibly bug you with yet another question or two? What is it like to participate in a meet-up, so not in the role of organiser, and which focuses on social anxiety specifically? What sort of stuff and activities (tend to) take place? Is there a specific kind of meet up you would recommend to someone who is eager to address social-related fears and issues, has no friends at the moment due to a break up at the end of last year (that I've only recently recovered from) and who has only participated in a user-led support group so far?

Thanks again for your input!