Situation; friend of yours bumping into people they know but you don't

[hollowone]

Have any of you been in a situation where a friend of yours runs into someone they know that you don't, then catches-up with them. In moments like this I find it difficult to judge the appropriacy of whether to go and introduce myself, or stand there like a lemon looking like a socially-inept don't know what to describe (so my thought tell me in the moment).

On the other side of the coin, if that was me bumping into and catching-up with someone I know, and I was with friends who didn't know them, I would feel a bit worried about whether my friends are feeling a bit awkward and left-out.

Say for example, we were en-route to somewhere else (as was the case on the occasions tonight). It would be a bit difficult to give a brief introduction, only to set-off on your own separate ways.

If it was in a pub where we had just bought our drinks and got settled, that would be a different story altogether.

On introducing people
If you bump into friends of yours that you're friends don't know, that is a hard situation in it's own right. In all fairness, if I was in my friend's situation, I would find it pretty hard to know how to introduce the people I'm with.

I know what it's like when people say 'this is so-n-so' and BANG; straight into an awkward silence; short 'hi' on the part of the receiving party, what the hell do I say next!?

In fairness, if you are in that situation, it's hard to know how how to introduce people. It's lso hard to know when to judge the appropriacy of introducing yourself e.g. 'Hi I'm so-n-so and I'm a mate of so-n-so'. On the one hand, you don't want to be forcing your way in and appaering attentions-seekin. On the other, you don't want to be stood there like a lemon.

The worry about being stood there like a lemon and them thinking I'm aloof, weird, awkward and unfriendly on one hand vs. whether they'll think I'm arrogant or intrusive for butting-int when they're catching-up. It's bloody awkward.

I wish I was better-equipped to deal with situations like these. Maybe my friend isn't that adept at dealing with situaitons like this himself, who knows? To be fair, it's hard to know how to bring friends into an interaction who don't know the person you've bumped-into, so that's another dilemma on my friend's part.

I'm always grumbling and complainging about how limited my social horizons are. These are the opportunities to expand my social circle. It's just a question of knowing how to deal more effectively with this particular situation. Has anyone here had experience of this? A friend who know's lots of people who bumps into people you don't know?

Any ideas will be welcome,

Cheers,

[Serephina]

If it's my friend that we meet then usually I would just say hello this is my friend Anna (or whatever that person's name is) depending on how well I know the person i.e if it's a close friend of mine I might even say Anna and I met at art group (which might give them something to talk about)

If I'm the one being introduced to somebodys friend,I don't say anything unless i'm introduced,I just smile at them to show i've acknowledged them being there and I let them talk. If I do get introduced I feel a lot more comfortable and notice their body language,if I see the friend smiling at me in a friendly way I might join in just with a couple of words here and there just to show i'm following the conversation. Unless I am asked a direct question by the friend.

I had a situation the other day when I was out with a friend,and he bumped in to one of his friends and I wasn't introduced until the person we bumped in to said "so who are you here with?" and even then it was a brief introduction. I tried to be friendly and join in the conversation to try and broaden my social circle, which I now feel that I shouldn't have done as I was made to feel very unwelcome for doing so (by the person we met,not by my friend). That isn't to say that everybody would react like this.

However,I do tend to keep quiet unless I am made to feel that it's ok to join in.

[few screws loose]

I think it's fine to not participate if you don't want to. I don't think there's any social expectation in these situations. I only nod, smile and give an acknowledgement to the other person, but if I don't feel like joining in, I don't, and I will just step away and let my friend and his/her friend get on with it.

[ItsNotAPorkChop]

This has happened to me a few times, when they have bumped into someone and start chatting for aaaages and I'm left stood behind them looking like a lemon and feeling extremely awkward.

Never happened the other way around though as I don't know many people around here to bump into :/ but I imagine it would be just as awkward, if not more.