Do you consider yourself attractive & sexually desirable to the opposite sex? - Page 6

sammmy · #**151** 3rd January 2012, 18:55

Hhaha Toxic, what if you wear a full body latex suit, covering up the head and face...BUT have the legs, hands and back cut out..

Johnni · #**152** 3rd January 2012, 18:56

Quote:

Originally Posted by sammmy

I'm a shorty.

You'll have to compensate with less cover up top. Or don't wear any footwear, the feet should make up a decent %.

Toxic · #**153** 3rd January 2012, 18:57

haha see now this is just getting kinky

..all in the name of science...

good point though! you can probably show 40% of your flesh off without revealing parts people could find That attractive? hands/arms/back/feet (blah!)

id find it hard to find anyone attractive purely by naked hands and a back

sammmy · #**154** 3rd January 2012, 18:59

I'll go out barefoot and in a balaclava tomorrow and wait for the horny gents to fall at my (bare) feet :D

FOR SCIENCE!
but not really..

cbear · #**155** 3rd January 2012, 19:01

I don't think I'm stunning, but I have attracted some guys before. I haven't lived by some 40% rule either lol.

Confidence plays a part but you have to get out into the world. It isn't by chance that the periods where I was most socially active were where I was getting attention.

Mr Ploppy · #**156** 3rd January 2012, 20:01

Wow, is this the longest thread i've started ?

schneebeli · #**157** 3rd January 2012, 21:26

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr Ploppy

Wow, is this the longest thread i've started ?

No, the Rant thread is

guile42 · #**158** 3rd January 2012, 22:37

hmm

sigh · #**159** 3rd January 2012, 22:42

Nope because I'm overweight and people are shallow.

Johnni · #**160** 3rd January 2012, 22:51

^ Ouch.

Johnni · #**161** 3rd January 2012, 23:05

For once i agree with Cynic.

T · #**162** 3rd January 2012, 23:05

I'd like to think so but i'm not convinced as time goes by

diplodocus · #**163** 3rd January 2012, 23:18

Just because it's 40% doesn't mean you can get away with wearing a hessian sack with the arse cheeks cut out!! Common sense people!

Johnni · #**164** 3rd January 2012, 23:19

^ Have you ever seen someone wearing a hessian sack with the arse cheeks cut out? I have and she had every man eating out of the palm of her hand.

diplodocus · #**165** 3rd January 2012, 23:20

Quote:

Originally Posted by Johnni

^ Have you ever seen someone wearing a hessian sack with the arse cheeks cut out? I have and she had every man eating out of the palm of her hand.

Pics or GTFO

Johnni · #**166** 3rd January 2012, 23:23

^ PM sent.

diplodocus · #**167** 3rd January 2012, 23:49

^

I'm shocked and outraged....

got any more?

Johnni · #**168** 3rd January 2012, 23:51

Loads.

Paper_Samurai · #**169** 4th January 2012, 00:21

Quote:

Originally Posted by joinmartin

Some people are shallow. Others are not. It's a mixed world.

Not all people are shallow. And even the ones that are are not shallow all the time.

At the end of the day, it always comes down to who you are as a person.

Yeah, looks might help some people. Or not. But eventually, people do tend to see the truth of a person. A beast can hide in anything but a good person can't help but reveal themselves to you.

I've lost a fair bit of weight recently. Went down six jean sizes. At university, I was basically keeping the local takeaways in business.

By the laws of the imagined shallow world, I should have been lonely all the time and outcast from society.

Instead, it was like a revolving door and one or two girls had it in their heads that I was some sort of player. I didn't give them that idea. They just had it. I was dumbfounded as to where they got that idea from.

Now, you can explain that in many different ways. Maybe I am some super stud in the looks department. I doubt it. But it does go to show one example of people overlooking my size and giving me a lot more than the time of day. And it's not an exception either, happens all over the place. There's a guy out there now with a genetic condition that messed up his face. He's dating a girl who could well be a model if she wanted to be. It's a funny old world out there, once you get past the agenda based, "let's make people feel bad about themselves" crap that forms the dark hypnotic induction in society that tries to tell people that they are not okay or good enough as they are.

There's loads of good looking people on this website. And yet, in many cases, anxiety paralyses their lives. You'd think that, if it were mainly about looks, those people simply would not have that problem.

This post. I endorse it.

P.S. Do you still post on the SAS forums joinmartin? Or has this become your new favourite haunt

Johnni · #**170** 4th January 2012, 00:23

^I agree with you.
I also agreed with Cynic's alteration cos i thought saying men are shallow was a bit out of order and better if Sigh used something like people are shallow (rather than single out men only) but then even that i disagree with.

Sleepless · #**171** 4th January 2012, 01:04

I actually think I'm okay looking, I just don't ever see myself getting a girlfriend because of my anxiety issues. And I just think women would rather go out with someone outgoing and successful. I'm none of those things, never will be.

sammmy · #**172** 4th January 2012, 05:14

Quote:

Originally Posted by Josephus

I actually think I'm okay looking, I just don't ever see myself getting a girlfriend because of my anxiety issues. And I just think women would rather go out with someone outgoing and successful. I'm none of those things, never will be.

Hmm, not necessarily. My boyfriend has SA, quite severely. And because of that he isn't successful, in a career sense of the word. But he's a wonderful person; a well rounded, interesting, witty, and intelligent person (not that he sees any of these qualities in himself.) Thank God for the internet, or we never would have met! We both have SA, but I think we help rather than hinder each other, as we both understand how the other is feeling and there is no pressure on one half of the relationship to do things the other doesn't feel comfortable with. We're slowly sorting this out together.

My ex was very outgoing and confident, the polar opposite to me, and successful. He was patient up to a point but my SA eventually lead to so many arguments. I can understand your low self confidence , as I sort of feel the same about myself. I just try to remember that I am my own worst enemy, and that nobody thinks as badly of me as I do.

diplodocus · #**173** 4th January 2012, 07:37

Quote:

Originally Posted by Josephus

I actually think I'm okay looking, I just don't ever see myself getting a girlfriend because of my anxiety issues. And I just think women would rather go out with someone outgoing and successful. I'm none of those things, never will be.

I think outgoing-ness and success are overrated in terms of being successful with women. I've seen guys who have done really well with neither quality, what they did have though was confidence. And looks didn't even seem to be that much of an issue either, not saying good looks don't help but it's not nearly as important as some might think. Confidence trumped all it seemed.

Speaking from my own experience, I'm not particularly successful or outgoing but my confidence in particular with women has improved a lot in recent years and so has my success. I don't think that's a coincidence.

sammmy · #**174** 4th January 2012, 11:30

All this talk of being shallow got me thinking. Aren't we all "shallow"?
I mean, if you are going date someone, or be in a sexual relationship with a person you have to be attracted to them surely? You wouldn't want to have sex with someone you found to be unattractive. Whether you go for typically attractive people or not? My boyfriend isn't your typical "attractive" male, he isn't 6 foot tall with a six pack and a chiseled jaw, but to me he's gorgeous. I don't find "manly men" hot. So I wouldn't go out with one, based on how they look...does that make me shallow in a way?

Golz · #**175** 4th January 2012, 11:57

Quote:

Originally Posted by diplodocus

Speaking from my own experience, I'm not particularly successful or outgoing but my confidence in particular with women has improved a lot in recent years and so has my success. I don't think that's a coincidence.

Which sort of confidence, about being confident in yourself/ accepting yourself perhaps and being able to just deal with people in general (so male or female) without massive anxiety issues or actually being confident in thinking that you have a chance with women?

As I think I've managed the first part of that, but the second still doesn't exist and as a result still feel quite invisible in that regard (doesn't help that most I know of are either in a relationship or lesbian). Think part of my problem is hard to find the non outgoing women as they not out there in the first place, as that's what would probably fit me best being similar myself. Don't think its as simple as that though as not like I ever get any interest.

GhostOnMagneticTape · #**176** 4th January 2012, 14:47

Quote:

Originally Posted by sammmy

All this talk of being shallow got me thinking. Aren't we all "shallow"?

Agreed, we all have preferences when looking for a partner, though sometimes people enter relationships from a friendship against each other's initial preferences I feel.

Are preferences shallow though?

Richy1984 · #**177** 4th January 2012, 15:46

I don't consider myself to be particularly attractive and I can't imagine myself as being sexually desirable either.

AxelFendersson · #**178** 4th January 2012, 15:54

Quote:

Originally Posted by AlienBuddha

Are preferences shallow though?

Depends what sort of preferences.

When we dismiss someone who is only interested in a partner's looks as 'shallow', we do so because a person's outward appearance is trivial, ephemeral and superficial. They are thus concerned only with things that are immediately obvious with no deeper meaning. Same with considerations like social status and wealth.

It is considered less shallow to be concerned with a partner's personality because this is a more important aspect of who they are as a person, and represents a deeper interest in that person's essential self.

Toxic · #**179** 4th January 2012, 16:49

oh its okay if your not attractive

aslong as you have some confidence!

oh shit, got neither

at least confidence has the advantage of being improved! looks your generally stuck with what youve got

i can only talk to women "easily" if i treat them like guys pretty much...(that doesnt mean im going to mess about and wrestle them to the ground or crap like that, too energetic im not 14 anymore..) ..but just in how i talk to them...if they are in a relationship...or married or whatever yeah they are not too hard to talk to (well no more so than guys) but single women whether i find attractive or not i just fall apart and start mumbling at the ground, god knows why

Rich Notts · #**180** 4th January 2012, 16:56

Quote:

Originally Posted by sammmy

Aren't we all "shallow"?
So I wouldn't go out with one, based on how they look...does that make me shallow in a way?

Nah I think I agree with the preference thing, everyone has their preference's (or prejudices

) against certain types of people but as you get to know them they become more or less attractive to you.
I've been around "attractive" people who I've slowly grown to see are not very nice and you no longer see them as attractive the same thing in reverse, if you go out with someone just on looks your going to be dissapointed but most of the time people do not and the internet almost goes the opposite way and people meet up based on personality or interests rather then looks.
Everyone has prejudice's its how you act on them that makes you shallow or not.