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  #1741  
Old 3rd June 2014, 23:15
buttonlane buttonlane is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Went to a Salas class on me tod tonight. Jesus christ I was anxious and painfully awkward. The people were so nice tbf. I attended both the beginners and intermediates.

I was VERY uncomfortable. I couldn't mask it either, it was all over my face. I'm not going to dwell on it. Lets just say it was tough going. Thats desensization for ya. It's going to be like this for some time, frustratingly. I'll go again next week, maybe find a second dance class to go to as well.


What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....and all that malarky. :/
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  #1742  
Old 4th June 2014, 08:41
Jason90 Jason90 is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

@Entity Thanks, yer it feels good after doing something you find challenging.

^ Nice one, keep it up! Not that I have any doubt you will.

Bit pathetic really but i've never ever made myself a doctors appointment my dad always rang for me, so last night I decided this morning id stop being silly and just do it, after doing it I have no idea why I was so anxious.

Edit:

After going to the doctors and successfully obtaining a prescription for sleeping tablets (I shall sleep!) I went up the shops for my sister and then went and picked up my prescription, one of the pharmacists said it was nice to put a name to a face seeing as my dad always picked them up for me, all little stuff but its all good.
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  #1743  
Old 4th June 2014, 17:59
buttonlane buttonlane is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Art class today.....was a hoot. I have a class full of excentrics..It's great!

Another new guy. (he grew up with Carl Pilkington) lives near me and I invited him down. When I came in he was sat next to Flatulence man. :/ The look on his face. Apparently he has a 'phobia of people who break wind.' Fortunately Trumpet man only released 'a couple' of chair destroying belters so I was spared from any real friction.

Good class, 8 showed up so I was kept busy.
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  #1744  
Old 4th June 2014, 18:34
Olly. Olly. is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nat36
I started a new voluntary job last week in a charity shop. I just do Wednesday mornings and today was my second time. Managed really well and I even enjoyed it this week.
Well done, Nat, sounds great
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  #1745  
Old 5th June 2014, 21:01
BodyDouble BodyDouble is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Starting lifting again tomorrow. All prepped and ready for my 6am start ahhh
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  #1746  
Old 5th June 2014, 21:45
db838 db838 is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Quote:
Originally Posted by woof
Went to the pub quiz last night with family.

We ate first and luckily found a quiet area which made it easier for me.

There were only about 6 teams playing so not rowdy.

My sa wasn't too bad but then again we were at the back.

The quiz master came round after to chat with us ,I stayed quiet though. =/

We came 3rd lol
I love quizzes, we had a work one last week and we came second. I went to the Chinese with a couple of female colleagues this evening and had a good time. My best mate didn't come so it's the first time I've really felt comfortable going out in the evening without him being there. So I've socialised with a group two weeks running
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  #1747  
Old 11th June 2014, 09:55
Jason90 Jason90 is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

well after 4 hours sleep yet again i think its safe to say any ideas about me retaining a sleep pattern are now gone. I felt like utter **** but set an alarm for 7.30am because i was adamant i wouldn't let my lack of sleep ruin my day and i was gonna repeat my experiment walking the dog when everyone was doing the school run so there were loads of people about to prove the idea everyone's looking at and judging me is b*****'s. Except today i was gonna do it in my pink t shirt for added anxiety after having a shower i was having 2nd thoughts but then thought f*** the anxiety and did it, turned out 80% of my walk was beside bumper to bumper to bumper cars for about 2 miles because of roadworks so god knows how many cars i passed. To top it all Ollie decided as usual going to the toilet in front of loads of people for maximum embarrassment to me would be a good idea (the little sod), shouldn't be much longer and my bright pink t shirt will just be another t shirt to me rather than anxiety provoking .
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  #1748  
Old 11th June 2014, 23:41
buttonlane buttonlane is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Art class today...... I feel like I'm getting more vocal, which is good. My confidence levels are up and down generally but in my class I feel like i'm progressing.

Flatulence man was getting on my nerves big time today. Apparently helping him how to draw is ''restricting.'' WTF!? I couldn't be bothered with a comeback or a clever reframe. I would have been wasting my breath. Lucky my other students don't share that view and want to improve there skills. Not just that....

He was belting them out like there as no tomorrow. Long drawn out affairs some of them were as well.

Me in class.
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  #1749  
Old 11th June 2014, 23:49
Z. Z. is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

^ I want to be uninhibited at some point, but really, not THAT uninhibited
I don't want to reach the point where my self-consciousness has diminished so much that I can just let them rip around other people without caring.
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  #1750  
Old 11th June 2014, 23:58
buttonlane buttonlane is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

^ He can' t help it but today he started doing those ones that never seem to stop that change pitch half way through...THEN blames it on the baked beans! lol. Sorry mate, bake beans do NOT make you yodel out of your arse.

Annoying.
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  #1751  
Old 13th June 2014, 18:49
Craig. Craig. is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Went and got my haircut which I've been putting off for ages! Also went and got my eyes tested, I need glasses, Which I'm not too fussed about, now to choose some that don't make me look like a ****!
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  #1752  
Old 13th June 2014, 19:23
Jason90 Jason90 is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

^ good stuff Craig, im currently putting both of those off although the glasses one is more because im too poor at the moment .
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  #1753  
Old 13th June 2014, 19:58
Craig. Craig. is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

^ Cheers bud! Haha i'm skint too man. They've got some pretty alright looking ones for about £20 in the Tesco Opticians, I might just pick them up until I can get a nicer looking pair. If you go into Tesco the eye test is free and if you're on JSA they'll give you a free pair of glasses upto like £38 or something.

P.S does a mod wanna tell me why '****' is censored? ahahah.
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  #1754  
Old 17th June 2014, 14:44
sam1w2e sam1w2e is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Finally went back to my old 6th form to pick up my A level certificates. I've been dreading doing this since I don't want to explain how I dropped out of university etc to my old teachers. Luckily I didn't bump into anyone that I knew so that was a relief.
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  #1755  
Old 17th June 2014, 15:59
Undecided Undecided is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

I have messaged a couple of people from SAUK and also got in touch with someone I used to be friends with.

Also been looking at voluntary work on the Do It website. I've been at my current voluntary work for a long time, and feel like it's time to move on. I don't dislike it there but I am starting to feel like I'm stuck in a rut and that I need to start challenging myself, meet new people etc.
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  #1756  
Old 18th June 2014, 08:47
Jason90 Jason90 is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

yesterday morning i woke up a bit worried about the course the job centre sent me on but kept the thought its not as big of a deal in reality as it is in my head even if i do something silly etc. She split us up and i ended up speaking to the 2 guys next to me and realised quickly they were both down to earth and in similar situations which obviously put me at ease. I made myself really practice eye contact and because there was lots of joking about it made it easier. The woman opposite on the other side of the room kept looking at me so i smiled at her and she smiled back, she actually did it a few times throughout the day, those i cant thoughts are starting to turn into i can thoughts. All in all it was a good day exposure wise and i even stayed after along with 2 women to speak to her and ask a few questions i had so im fairly pleased with myself.
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  #1757  
Old 18th June 2014, 08:56
thaigreen thaigreen is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

well done Jason
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  #1758  
Old 18th June 2014, 09:00
pheys pheys is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

its all great how everyone is making some kinda progress
soon you all will just shrug your shoulders at SA and realise how silly it is
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  #1759  
Old 18th June 2014, 16:34
Jason90 Jason90 is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

^hope so, nice avatar its good to see who your talking to i find it makes them seem more human.

@Thaigreen thanks .

Well last time i went swimming was after about an 8 year gap and long story short i almost drowned, the life guards were as good as useless and i ended up having to save myself, it was pretty traumatic and loads of people were laughing at me and taking the piss (i heard their comments). Anyway i was determined not to give up and try swimming again, so earlier i went with my dad we went into the kids pool , lucky for me it was empty, my sa made me feel incredibly self conscious but i figured if anyone takes the piss their ignorant. I felt like the life guards eyes were burning a hole in me but it was all in my head she was actually sitting in a relaxed manner with no expression. I tried swimming then just floating on my back etc but it was no use anytime i felt like my mouth was going underwater id panic about not being able to breath so i didn't really achieve anything classed as swimming and then a group of kids were having a lesson so i left but i still see it as an achievement just going. It is so frustrating that last time i went i was full of confidence and could swim and now i cant even do it in a kids pool i guess getting into the proper pool is decent motivation though. I felt like i was gonna be sick before leaving the house and i didn't notice anyone laughing or pointing or anything when i was there which was reassuring so im thinking of having proper lessons.
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  #1760  
Old 18th June 2014, 19:41
iTz0kt0Bu iTz0kt0Bu is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

I usually am able to comfortably go lunch with the 3 male collegues at work. However I don't get on with the female collegue and hence feel SA around her. But today, as I had an early lunch, I ate in the office kitchen where she also was. Despite feeling SA and being treated like I was a ghost, she spoke to other ppl but not me, I didn't let that get to me as it was her that was acting the way she was and her reaction doesn't say much about me, she isn't that bad but isn't really nice to me, most times. She is a year younger than me and I sometimes get the feeling that she feels she has to please "the cool crowd."

I should be like this more often, negative treatment and some of my assumtions maintain my SA it seems so why give them power.
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  #1761  
Old 20th June 2014, 15:49
bluefairy bluefairy is offline
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Talking Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Made a phonecall to the dentist, which I've been putting off for ages. It went better then all of the possibilities I'd thought up in my head.
Then i did this.
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  #1762  
Old 20th June 2014, 17:50
pheys pheys is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

happily explained to a very happy and pretty Polish woman about the parking regulations nearby with eye contact and no anxiety at all.
might be winning but still, celebrate every success
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  #1763  
Old 21st June 2014, 20:58
purplerose purplerose is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

i always avoid going into town at the weekends as its way too busy but i actually went today and survived lol
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  #1764  
Old 23rd June 2014, 14:33
Clayman Clayman is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

feeling happy, confident and motivated. What caused this? reading about something that lead to an a'ha moment (new neural pathway being created?) that most probably made me get away from the regular self-defeating negative thoughts that normally plague my mind.
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  #1765  
Old 24th June 2014, 17:07
Sunshine Recorder Sunshine Recorder is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

^ Awesome, Nat! I went through the city centre for the first time during my driving lesson yesterday!

Today, I managed to help a girl with getting to a place by public transport. She asked me how to get to a town, and I just Googled directions via public transport. I let her know that there wasn't a bus directly to her destination, but she could get a bus to another town, and get another bus from there.

It's probably a small thing for most people, but if this happened a year ago, I probably would've said to her that I have no idea. Whenever I feel I'm not making any progress, I'll just think back to this moment.
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  #1766  
Old 25th June 2014, 11:47
Jason90 Jason90 is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

At my group CBT yesterday i made a special effort to maintain eye contact and while doing it i thought of a way to help me do it, i tried to see what colour the woman's eyes were. Unfortunately i didn't have my glasses so i think they were blue but they may be green, anyway while trying to work it out i was maintaining eye contact which meant i had less focus on me feeling uncomfortable etc so im gonna try it some more and see how it goes.
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  #1767  
Old 25th June 2014, 12:05
thaigreen thaigreen is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

I'm going to keep a hand written log of my acheivements, I think.

At the gym this morning, I was doing some running on the treadmill, who I thought was my gym nemesis started to use the treadmill next to me, we had a conversation, he basically asked where my mate had went, meaning where my gym partner had gone, and he is under the thumb of his missus but that's another story.. lol..

Then he said how he looked like he didn't have a clue anyway and how he pretty much relied on me, which I thought was EXTREMELY complimenting! And how he thought it's not on for him to just use my training skills and then go. So so happy about being recognised as a valuable person.

We spoke about training, bodybuilding, competing, diet, all types of things, it was a very good in depth chat and no "um or yeah" type of thing, i'm trying to keep the ball rolling with conversation so much.

I want to have more experiences where I've let my SA or depression come between talking to people, and we've started talking and their absolutely gentle people.

It's funny though, because the guy was HUGE, and it was just nice to be recognised. And he had noticed how much I had helped my gym partner out. So so strange.
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  #1768  
Old 25th June 2014, 12:30
MissyP. MissyP. is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jason90
At my group CBT yesterday i made a special effort to maintain eye contact and while doing it i thought of a way to help me do it, i tried to see what colour the woman's eyes were. Unfortunately i didn't have my glasses so i think they were blue but they may be green, anyway while trying to work it out i was maintaining eye contact which meant i had less focus on me feeling uncomfortable etc so im gonna try it some more and see how it goes.
That's great you've found a way to maintain eye contact
Quote:
Originally Posted by thaigreen
I'm going to keep a hand written log of my acheivements, I think.

At the gym this morning, I was doing some running on the treadmill, who I thought was my gym nemesis started to use the treadmill next to me, we had a conversation, he basically asked where my mate had went, meaning where my gym partner had gone, and he is under the thumb of his missus but that's another story.. lol..

Then he said how he looked like he didn't have a clue anyway and how he pretty much relied on me, which I thought was EXTREMELY complimenting! And how he thought it's not on for him to just use my training skills and then go. So so happy about being recognised as a valuable person.

We spoke about training, bodybuilding, competing, diet, all types of things, it was a very good in depth chat and no "um or yeah" type of thing, i'm trying to keep the ball rolling with conversation so much.

I want to have more experiences where I've let my SA or depression come between talking to people, and we've started talking and their absolutely gentle people.

It's funny though, because the guy was HUGE, and it was just nice to be recognised. And he had noticed how much I had helped my gym partner out. So so strange.
Well done with the convo with him.
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  #1769  
Old 25th June 2014, 13:22
northeastsouthwest northeastsouthwest is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

I queued up at tesco today and spoke to the cashier for 15 minutes . After speaking to her for a while, she told me that I was a beautiful person (her words!) and that she wished me a good day.

Some nice people around after all
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  #1770  
Old 25th June 2014, 22:17
pheys pheys is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

big test for me tomorrow as the site boss (an attractive young woman) has offered to drop me off where I live as taking the train is three hours where the drive is 40 minutes
already progress as in the past would desperately be thinking of excuses to not do this even though it inconveniences me, but now, no panic at all, maybe slightly nervy but trats not gonna stop me
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