Found arseholes judging me online

[Ben]

The guy was crude, exploitative and way out of order, the whole site is creepy. This thread is starting to get creepy with comments regarding bashing his head in, comparing him to a nazi, volumous ch*unt references.

I think SM is right that an e-lynching of this immature, thoughtless kid could provoke the thousands of other silly kids on that forum to swamp this site and render it useless. By all means be outraged by his actions, but dont be outrageous in response. The best way to mock (if you feel the need to do so) his immaturity and stupidity, is to respond in a mature, sensible, and firm way imo.

[png]

Originally Posted by Deepguy

Indeed. I'm wondering if I might have misinterpreted that post. I took it to mean that YCM was a Trekkie and is representative of Trekkies in general. If that's not what you meant Pantini then I'm sorry :embarass:

It was a throwaway comment, that being the only thing i could remember about the guy. I'm sure trekkies are generally decent people.

[png]

hilarious 'shopping btw Deeshow

[WalkinTall]

"Mince" is now a meme

:rolleyes:

[Pal]

Originally Posted by Fibbs

I get it a lot on a site I help with as we expose trolls/fakes/players and nasties just like YCM on a big UK chat site. It goes with the job title, nasties turn nastier when exposed in my experience!

YCM is most likely watching all this unfold getting some sad kick from the devastation he has caused, usually you find thats how these people work!

It's their anonimity that protects them although you do get one or two who get cocky enough to reveal more then enough personal information about themselves, usually because they have a sufficent number of mates in their local area to back them up should they need it.

In many cases if they weren't spending so much time trolling on line they'd probably be hanging around street corners in baseball caps.

[Rick Sanchez]

Wow... I just have to echo what everyone else has said - what a c***.

Still, for what it's worth, eBaum's world forums seems to be largely full of vile, pubescent teenage cretins who post vile, gratuitous images of people with their heads blown off in Iraq and Photoshop "FAIL" on it, or something and then "ROFL!1!" and LOLZ!1!" at it.

Their opinion means nothing.

[LexSless]

Originally Posted by Silver

Oh man I so wanna pm that **** and give him a piece of my mind. But apparently my account isnt activated on that site yet. Ah well

If youre on myspace you can do so via that. easy to find (he posted it) if you can be arsed

[Pal]

Originally Posted by Cynic

Were they the same ones that you spoke of during that court case?

Not related!!

Originally Posted by Cynic

Its their sense of anonyminity that deludes them into thinkingn they are safe.

Sense in some cases, not so in others, i've heard of trolls who go so far as to create fake ID information about their real lives including pictures. :rolleyes:

[cheesehoven]

Originally Posted by Ben

The guy was crude, exploitative and way out of order, the whole site is creepy. This thread is starting to get creepy with comments regarding bashing his head in, comparing him to a nazi, volumous ch*unt references.

I think SM is right that an e-lynching of this immature, thoughtless kid could provoke the thousands of other silly kids on that forum to swamp this site and render it useless. By all means be outraged by his actions, but dont be outrageous in response. The best way to mock (if you feel the need to do so) his immaturity and stupidity, is to respond in a mature, sensible, and firm way imo.

Surely name calling and photoshopping is doing to Mince as he is accused of doing (I've not looked at the thread in question)? It is hard to see he will learn from his immaturity by seeing this. He is more likely to justify his behaviour retrospectively ie "I know I was out of order but this is too much". I gather he sent an apology via pm to Ray, which should have been the end of it.
This whole thread is a sorry reminder of how quickly a mob mentality can build up with people needing to up the ante to fit in. Exactly like Ebaum in fact.

[diplodocus]

Originally Posted by Ben

The guy was crude, exploitative and way out of order, the whole site is creepy. This thread is starting to get creepy with comments regarding bashing his head in, comparing him to a nazi, volumous ch*unt references.

I think SM is right that an e-lynching of this immature, thoughtless kid could provoke the thousands of other silly kids on that forum to swamp this site and render it useless. By all means be outraged by his actions, but dont be outrageous in response. The best way to mock (if you feel the need to do so) his immaturity and stupidity, is to respond in a mature, sensible, and firm way imo.

I agree, the immaturity stops right now!

[Ben]

Originally Posted by cheesehoven

Surely name calling and photoshopping is doing to Mince as he is accused of doing (I've not looked at the thread in question)? It is hard to see he will learn from his immaturity by seeing this. He is more likely to justify his behaviour retrospectively ie "I know I was out of order but this is too much". I gather he sent an apology via pm to Ray, which should have been the end of it.
This whole thread is a sorry reminder of how quickly a mob mentality can build up with people needing to up the ante to fit in. Exactly like Ebaum in fact.

I do agree, especially the bits I have put in bold. Peoples disgust is understandable, but I think keeping the moral high ground requires a modicum of restraint, when expressing it.

People in general (me too) like to be outraged, they like to have someone to vent at, and the phenomenal number of views and responses (and their tone) to this thread seems to validate that. Part of me wishes the mods had removed this thread before it mushroomed, and dealt with it behind the scenes, to save the exploited women the sense of paranoia they now feel. Also it would have prevented some of the frankly distasteful responses that have occured here.

But they were not to know this would happen, and fair play to them for the measures they have taken to get the images removed.

[Defiance]

I'm not condoning this guys actions, and just as a disclaimer I myself don't go around pulling people's photos.


however, I'm the same age as company man and see this sort of thing alot in social forums where adolesence/young adult males tend to make up the vast majoirty of posters stuff like this happens frequently, i think possibly he might be an ok guy underneath but just got caught up in the mentaility of it all.

let me just try and explain.

basically what tends to happen is someone posts a pic a of female. The female posted often (around 70% of the time) tends to have a somewhat unconventual look about her ...or a look that borders on what people (the media) deems to be the ideal of beauty.


the picture of the posted female is often followed by words like "would you?" or "would you hit it?"

the further the female looks from the media's ideal of beauty the more brutal the comments tend to be. the (males) weather they're themselves attractive, average, ..or bare close resemblence to shrek seem to jump on in with derogatory comments designed to raise a smile in an nasty kind of way.


people here who got thier pics put up on there don't take the comments to heart, it's not worth feeling lousy over. you'd be surprised at how many girls who do fit quite closely to the media's ideal view of beatuy still get ripped appart in those threads. seriously even if someone put up a picture of Kelly brook or someone who fits the mould as on the same level as that they'd probably atleast a couple of guys in there making off comments.

..it can be sort of a guy thing amounst the age group online ...sorta like how a guy will act more macho or "hard" when with his mates then when he's by himself ..it's basically the same sort of thing going on here. truthfully if given the choice most of the guys who make the derogatory comments would indeed "hit it" ..they're just saying those things to look big.

[diplodocus]

Yeah it's pretty normal for guys to do this sort of thing on other forums. Seen it plenty of times and you're right even supposedly perfect women get ripped to shreds.

Thing is taking an SA members pictures and posting them on a forum knowing full well that they may (more than likely) get ripped to shreds is pretty despicable. Especially since self-image is a highly emotive and sensitive issue for a lot of people, both men and women on here. So knowing that and still doing it then apologising saying that he didn't realise that would happen?? Stinks of bullshit to me.

I'd have probably left it if I thought he'd given a decent heartfelt apology that really showed he fully understood the damage his actions caused.

What he's getting now is nothing more than happens on plenty of sites up and down the land to people much less deserving than himself. At least he knows what goes on in them parts so he at least is habituated to this sort of stuff. He brought it on himself by his actions and then didn't properly apologise. At least he have some say in whether this happened or not. The people he did this to had no say at all.

If you can't do the time, don't do the crime.

*I doubt he's that bothered by the photoshopping anyway. We are talking about a guy who takes self-protraits of himself with pants on his head after all.

[Ben]

Good post Defiance. I think a stern word or three with this lad would be more helpful than saying he is an evil chunt, with accompanying threats of physical violence. I do think for him, its like you say, getting caught up with a particular thread on that site, and because of interpersonal inexperience he has done something profoundly hurtful to some people, not because he is nasty, jus cause he is young, full of testosterone, and inexperienced.

I for one dont think this guy is evil, and I personally dont think he should have been permanently banned. The errors of his ways should have been explained to him, and he should have been punished, but banning him permanently is reactionary and short sighted.

[threadbare]

*jaw hits floor* wow - this guy has really acted like a prize prick - i'd have been mortified if this had happened to me when i was posting here regularly. it does sound from his apology that perhaps he acted more out of some need for peer acceptance and sheer thoughtlessness rather than malice or cruelty though. i don't know whether that makes it any easier to deal with for those on the receiving end of his actions. perhaps if he had had the maturity or insight to realise how much it would mess with people's heads to do something like this, he'd have thought twice before acting this way

[threadbare]

hiya Silver - i'd not been hiding exactly, just off being troublesome elsewhere
yeah, it's good to see that the people who did have the misfortune to be caught up in this are receiving so much moral support.

[LexSless]

i think this guy's big mistake was lack of effort to reduce the likelihood of being busted.

I'm sure plenty of people here slagging him off will have objectified members of the opposite sex in pretty much the same way.

I have.

but unless you're a REALLY harsh bastard you make sure as dammit that the person you're talking about isnt ever going to hear/know, that way they cant possibly get hurt. You are (i am) still an arsehole, just not hurting anyone.

YCM is clearly a bit of a plonker... he could easily have downloaded those pictures and changed their names and re-uploaded to an anon photo hosting account. instead he just directly copied the links as given on here..... all bozrena had to do was search her username and bam, she feels like a c**t. if he'd done as above with hers and the other member photos that he posted no one here would ever have known and he'd have been an arsehole that wouldnt have done any damage.

i'd definately take the message he sent to Ray with a raised eyebrow. he probably is sorry but i'm sure he's not completely simple so he mustve realised that claiming that he didnt realise he was doing 'owt wrong doesnt exactly compute when a) if he didnt know it was wrong he'd have tried such a thread here..... but he wouldnt have dared dream of it, and b) most (i stress MOST, i'm sure SOME people WILL have posted a photo for the following reason at least to some extent but will have hidden that desire as much as possible because it'd look baaaaad) will not have posted a photo to have their f**kability discussed here or anywhere else

i agree with Ben though.... though not cheese 100% as what people are doing here isnt really like YCM did; the people in the ebaum thread were insulted without having done anything wrong whereas YCM clearly has. i think if you want to retain some class (boz/silver and everyone else abused in the ebaum thread apart, you can say what you bloody like, you've every right to be hurt and upset to f**k) then a more dignified response would be the way to go

[Ben]

Originally Posted by deeshow

Thing is taking an SA members pictures and posting them on a forum knowing full well that they may (more than likely) get ripped to shreds is pretty despicable. Especially since self-image is a highly emotive and sensitive issue for a lot of people, both men and women on here. So knowing that and still doing it then apologising saying that he didn't realise that would happen?? Stinks of bullshit to me.

Whiff off immaturity to me.

Originally Posted by deeshow

I'd have probably left it if I thought he'd given a decent heartfelt apology that really showed he fully understood the damage his actions caused.

What constitutes a heartfelt apology? If the guy was truly nasty, I am sure he would not have apologised at all. The fact he did, without any mocking tone, says to me, even though the apology was short, it was genuine, as it did not contain any mocking content. Maybe he was in a state of shock about the shit storm he caused? Or maybe he is just plain evil? If you think the latter, read his past posts, and see if you still feel the same way

Originally Posted by deeshow

What he's getting now is nothing more than happens on plenty of sites up and down the land to people much less deserving than himself. At least he knows what goes on in them parts so he at least is habituated to this sort of stuff. He brought it on himself by his actions and then didn't properly apologise. At least he have some say in whether this happened or not. The people he did this to had no say at all.

Not good enough. Petty, potentially illegal, posts saying he is a chunt and he deserves a good kicking... cos thats what happens on other sites... dont cut it for me. As much as the person in question should grow up, so should some of the responders on this thread. Whatever way you cut it, some of the responses on here have been vile, glib, and downright stupid.... much like his actions when you think about it.

Originally Posted by deeshow

*I doubt he's that bothered by the photoshopping anyway. We are talking about a guy who takes self-protraits of himself with pants on his head after all.

A lot of the women whose images were used participated in a thread where they posted pictures of themselves with their knickers on their head. Your point is pointless, (seriously) no disrespect.

[bozrena]

I just had no idea this would create such a huge response - I'd like to agree with Silver in thanking all the mods & everyone who helped solve the problem.

[LexSless]

Originally Posted by Ben

banning him permanently is reactionary and short sighted.

i dont think there are many people who would have made him feel like a valued, welcome member if he hadnt been. He may be better off banned when you look at like that

[Medea]

Just to clear up any misunderstanding that might have occurred. YCM and his aliases are permanently banned.

What happened to the women concerned was a breech of their privacy and a breech of their trust. They posted their images in good faith in an environment especially sensitive (it was assumed) to their fears and insecurities. They did not post their images on "hot or not" or even "MySpace" and none of the images were sexually provocative or flirtatious, but simply pictures of women who use (and some who used) SAUK and believed they were posting their picture in a community of people who would understand their insecurities and not abuse their trust.

I am very sorry this happened. I cannot imagine how the women in question must feel to have had their, often brave, action of posting a photo, taken and made into something seedy and judgemental.

ren

[Ben]

Originally Posted by AnonymousLaura

Just to clear up any misunderstanding that might have occurred. YCM and his aliases are permanently banned.

What happened to the women concerned was a breech of their privacy and a breech of their trust. They posted their images in good faith in an environment especially sensitive (it was assumed) to their fears and insecurities. They did not post their images on "hot or not" or even "MySpace" and none of the images were sexually provocative or flirtatious, but simply pictures of women who use (and some who used) SAUK and believed they were posting their picture in a community of people who would understand their insecurities and not abuse their trust.

I am very sorry this happened. I cannot imagine how the women in question must feel to have had their, often, brave action of posting a photo, taken and made into something seedy and judgemental.

ren

I have took the brave step of posting my photo and have been propositioned (sometimes in a crude way) by female members of this board. Do you want their names, so you can ban them permanently?

I know for a fact that these women have discussed my image with others, in a "hot or not" way. Maybe they have exchanged my image without my knowledge?

The sillyness of some blokes actions has been totally eclipsed by the faux outrage displayed here.

This silly frenzy that has been whipped up, has made some people even more conscious of their appearance, nice one! Lexless said, completely correctly, that anyone that is human, has objectified members of the opposite sex. That is a fundamental truth, and villifying a daft kid in the way you have (cos he has done that in a crude stupid way) says more about you lot that it does him.

[Kevin Hodge]

i just wanted to say that the type of remarks on that ebaum site are extremely common among young guys. this is one of the reasons i find it hard to fit in with a lot of guys...because they are like that.

i am slightly baffled by the shock that has been displayed on here in response to this stuff.

i KNOW that for any of the women concerned, it would have been totally insane and very upsetting, finding themselves discussed in this way. but i thought that most people knew that a lot of guys were like that.

isn't it depressing to get such a strong and stark image of how shit so many people are? it's hard to find decent people

for my part...someone sent me a message on youtube recently. i had posted a tuitional video i made, and they told me i am fat and useless (imo, they were at least half right). on the other hand, some people have given me some very positive remarks too. i tend to dwell more on the latter.

[Defiance]

How can the error of his ways be explained to him, how old is he, 2?

Perhaps you should put yourself in the position of your picture being on there & then your opinion may change?

I know this comment isn't directed at me but I can see your point about how it made you feel, it really must not have been nice ..and this is a SA site afterall so probably people will be extra sensitive.

he went too far, .. alot of guys that age are like this though.

As to weather or not it would upset/anger me if i had been put up there, at this point in time no, ..but in the past when i was a lot more insecure about my looks it probably would.

I think it was right to ban the guy but only because he has really upset alot of people quite badly and I don't think him being here is fair on them seeing how upset people are.

I genuinly think he just got too caught up in the mentality of what goes on in these forums.

it's hard to describe but the more time you spend on such forums the more this sort of stuff rubs off on a person.

[Kevin Hodge]

Originally Posted by Ben

Do you want their names, so you can ban them permanently?

what possible use would there be in YCM posting here now anyway? it would only serve to further insult those he has already insulted so successfully, and he'll never get his end away now anyway.

[Medea]

Originally Posted by Ben

I have took the brave step of posting my photo and have been propositioned (sometimes in a crude way) by female members of this board. Do you want their names, so you can ban them permanently?

If you have had a problem with a female member via PM then please PM a Mod with the information and we will look into it.

The sillyness of some blokes actions has been totally eclipsed by the faux outrage displayed here.

I'd like to see how you can prove any reaction here has been "faux". I would deem his behaviour beyond silly, but that's semantics for you.

This silly frenzy that has been whipped up, has made some people even more conscious of their appearance, nice one! Lexless said, completely correctly, that anyone that is human, has objectified members of the opposite sex. That is a fundamental truth, and villifying a daft kid in the way you have (cos he has done that in a crude stupid way) says more about you lot that it does him.

I am quite confident that the vast majority of people will not be pointing fingers at me wondering why I am so outraged by the actions of this man. What he did was terrible and has upset a great deal of people and undermined the confidence of a lot of women and men on this site. Appropriate action has been taken against YCM and, should a similar situation occur in the future (which I hope it never will) we would, I am confident, take the same action.

Originally Posted by cloaca

i just wanted to say that the type of remarks on that ebaum site are extremely common among young guys. this is one of the reasons i find it hard to fit in with a lot of guys...because they are like that.

i am slightly baffled by the shock that has been displayed on here in response to this stuff.

i KNOW that for any of the women concerned, it would have been totally insane and very upsetting, finding themselves discussed in this way. but i thought that most people knew that a lot of guys were like that.

Unfortunately a lot of women are not aware of this. I had brothers so I had some idea, but they certainly never posted images of women on websites to people they had never met.
I am aware that some men talk about women in an objectified way, some women do too, but it is very different to take an image of a woman and post that image for other men to make judgements on.

isn't it depressing to get such a strong and stark image of how shit so many people are? it's hard to find decent people

for my part...someone sent me a message on youtube recently. i had posted a tuitional video i made, and they told me i am fat and useless (imo, they were at least half right). on the other hand, some people have given me some very positive remarks too. i tend to dwell more on the latter.

People can be nasty and rude and a lot of us are all too aware of this from past experience. I think a lot of the women in question would not choose to post their image on sites where they might receive unpleasant comments. What has upset a lot of people is how little YCM thought of the feelings of the women involved or thought of them as human beings.

[Grah08]

defiance is right, it's sort of laddish talk which occurs whether on some exclusive male forums or in certain male companies. He does deserve the ban, I think perhaps permanent maybe a bit harsh but there are other sa sites and it ensures he doesn't do it again.

[Pal]

Originally Posted by Defiance

I genuinly think he just got too caught up in the mentality of what goes on in these forums.

it's hard to describe but the more time you spend on such forums the more this sort of stuff rubs off on a person.

Yes indeed, i'm actually quite surprised that YCM was the guilty party since he hadn't ever struck me as that sort, hang around c*nts long enough and people do start to become one in many cases.

[Ben]

Originally Posted by cloaca

i just wanted to say that the type of remarks on that ebaum site are extremely common among young guys. this is one of the reasons i find it hard to fit in with a lot of guys...because they are like that.

i am slightly baffled by the shock that has been displayed on here in response to this stuff.

I totally agree, dont write this guy off as evil, just inexperienced, and not fully cogniscent of acceptable etiquette.

I dont know why people feel the urge to make this guy some hate symbol, he is probs as confused and mixed up as many an SA guy.

Cheesy said that people feel the need to up the 'hate' ante to fit in, I think thats correct. Dont write this kid off, cos u want to be seen as more outraged than the previous poster. I am flagging, so will just say I think thats wrong. If you know the guy is horrible, then hate him, if you dont, dont go with the flow, be a big person and give him the benefit of the doubt.

[Medea]

Originally Posted by Ben

Cheesy said that people feel the need to up the 'hate' ante to fit in, I think thats correct. Dont write this kid off, cos u want to be seen as more outraged than the previous poster. I am flagging, so will just say I think thats wrong. If you know the guy is horrible, then hate him, if you dont, dont go with the flow, be a big person and give him the benefit of the doubt.

And that benefit of the doubt would be...? That he accidently took these images and posted them on a site where men "rate" women and, after seeing one post making comments about a female posters self harming scars he continued to post images?

The argument that you shouldn't feel outraged because other people do is not a good one. People have every right to be outraged and upset without being told they are becoming sheeple.

He has been punished and will not be returning to this site, that's the end of it and I for one wish he'd never done these things to cause the pain that he has (and yes, he has caused pain to these women). I hope he's learned something from what has happened and if he goes on to other sites he wont repeat his mistake, but that's not the job of any of us, our job is to keep the people on this site as safe as we can.