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  #1  
Old 24th June 2017, 22:37
hollowone hollowone is offline
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Default Why you shouldn't live in a seaside town

The only future you'll face in a seaside town is a life of joblessnesss, labour market exclusion, stagnation, and worst of all as consequence, social isolation, social frustration, datelesssness, dating market exclusion, hopelessness & misery. Depression and the bottle are never far away. It is akin to something where light falls in, but never excapes due to the most extreme gravitational pull.

Just like the gravitational pull of a black hole, it sucks you into it's maws. That COMFORT ZONE you feel; You're contented but unhappy, surviving, but not living. that's it's gravity well spaghettifying you without you even noticing! It saps your motivation and energy, it destroys your inspiration, aspiration adn ambition. It sucks your soul out of you. Facing the factors in the previous paragraph are like heavy weights rendering achieving an escape velocity even more unlikely.

Meanwhile, you know that greener pastures are out there. Your resources and fuel that are needed to make the transition to a better life are being depleted from underneath you. What you need to do to make changes gradually becomes insurmountably scary; this force sends a wave of over-powering doubt, fear and questioning that paralyses you; the black hole's gravitational field.

The 'escape velocity'=the metaphor for the desire, confidence, independence and willing to step out your comfort zone required to turn your life around and evade this fate
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  #2  
Old 24th June 2017, 23:21
Clementine Clementine is offline
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Default Re: Why you shouldn't live in a seaside town

My seaside town is nothing like that, thankfully. Well, not so I've noticed at least, it's probably worse in busier towns. There are a heck of a lot of old folk though, why do so many old people feel the need to flock to the seaside to die?
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  #3  
Old 25th June 2017, 03:34
hollowone hollowone is offline
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Default Re: Why you shouldn't live in a seaside town

You cannot meet any new people except those your parents and grandparents age, or else scummy people such as ex cons and addicts who come down because of the abundance of former hotel stock converted to bedsits.

It's a nightmare to get a social life partly due to the employment problem.. If the people you went to school and college with have gone their seperate ways, settled-down, or grown apart there's nothing you can do (except if you get the right type of job, which the local economy is stacked against you) to meet new people except those your parent's and grandparents age, it's easy to say that there's loads of stacked against meeting new people.

Worse, the career prospects, the fact that it's all dead-ended jobs. Either that or unemployment. If you're single, how attractive is that going to be? Who could lie with that? Live with that, who could?

Such an environment is depressing and destroys your mental health, your curiosity, your ambition. The social isolation is too much.

I'm scared that conventional hard right people would criticize me for being weak for the very act of expressing these feelings, that I feel trapped in a black hole. It feels like there's no point in trying.

I've most likely gotten the articulation wrong. Someone out there with the same problem will express what I'm feeling but articulate better than I can sooner or later.
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  #4  
Old 25th June 2017, 04:17
newbs16 newbs16 is offline
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Default Re: Why you shouldn't live in a seaside town

Personally I think you need to push yourself to try and meet new people. I very much doubt that everyone you could possibly come in contact with is old enough to be your gran . I have often thought that it must be difficult when you live near the seaside, compared to the city. Are you able to travel further where there may be more jobs available. Maybe you could try for a seasonal job, it will help you to meet new people, give you a bit of money and give you some experience. I know it can't be easy, I hope you manage to feel a bit better about things.
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  #5  
Old 25th June 2017, 08:03
Spectrelight Spectrelight is offline
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Default Re: Why you shouldn't live in a seaside town

I'd move back to Brighton in a shot if I could get a decent job there
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  #6  
Old 25th June 2017, 08:26
Ronnie_Pickering Ronnie_Pickering is offline
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Default Re: Why you shouldn't live in a seaside town

I badly wanted to move from Plymouth, as there was 'instincts' there. Some of the instincts were right (found far better employment opportunities), some of the instincts were wrong. (That my SA would go down, I'll meet load new people)
You evidently feel miserable living where you do, so what I did in Plymouth was tried to make most of it, but while making strong efforts to move.
Ideally you need an idea where you want to move to, you need to have visited a few times. Then it's looking at stuff like spare room and job opportunities. It is hard to move town/city I would admit that as you are trying to couple a job and accommodation. (Unless you look for DSS places. )

I do share frustration of the lack of opportunities to meet new people. I think it's a plague of this modern age.
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  #7  
Old 25th June 2017, 12:14
Tembo Tembo is offline
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Default Re: Why you shouldn't live in a seaside town

I don't think this issue is confined to seaside towns. It appears to be similar in most places outside of the large cities.

The seaside towns near me are much better than they used to be about 10 years ago. Places like Whitstable, Margate, Herne Bay are very up and coming, have lots of interesting events, things to do, and young people, and even some foreign tourists! It is largely getting better due to gentrification and DFLs (Down From London), which of course pushes local people out who can no longer afford to live there , but it's great to see the local economies doing a lot better than they used to.
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  #8  
Old 25th June 2017, 14:54
Coffee Coffee is offline
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Default Re: Why you shouldn't live in a seaside town

I think you're right OP seaside towns in this country have become an awful concentration of social problems, it's such a shame.
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  #9  
Old 25th June 2017, 20:28
Damp_Squib Damp_Squib is offline
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Default Re: Why you shouldn't live in a seaside town

No wonder the population of many seaside towns is falling, while the UK as a whole has had its biggest population increase for 70 years.
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  #10  
Old 25th June 2017, 20:43
Tom Morello Tom Morello is offline
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Default Re: Why you shouldn't live in a seaside town

You could say similar things about cities apart from the very biggest ones. I live in a small city where nothing much goes on, it's very "studenty" and a pretty closed shop unless you made loads of friends at school/college or go to one of the unis. It wasn't easy to find work either.
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  #11  
Old 25th June 2017, 21:42
Quicksand Quicksand is offline
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Default Re: Why you shouldn't live in a seaside town

When youre the middle of the countryside in a wee 'twee' town where social status matters a hell of a lot, trust me its no better. once tried eyemouth (for two nights with my 6 month old at the time) and was brought back by car in defeat to home town. never been able to leave it since. every time i try even when i take a well earned break with my youngster being chaperoned by a school teacher abroad i might add...mother goes nuts. its like its a prison sentence to me. sigh. seaside towns prob advantageous if only for getting that sea air into the lungs...and the odd yacht or boat ride if you have friends in the right places....provided the seagulls arent evil bastards ofc stealing your chips or battering you for no reason if just that theyre angry at life themselves.
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  #12  
Old 26th June 2017, 10:59
Mr. Nobody Mr. Nobody is offline
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Default Re: Why you shouldn't live in a seaside town

the ones I've lived in were Aberdeen and Blackpool and they're pretty vibrant places,
certainly no social isolation there, unless you're looking for it.
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