crappy mates

jludvig · #1 25th March 2009, 11:27

im sick of my crappy mates none of them ever bother to text me in the week or ask how i am... i just feel like they cant be arsed and got better things to do.... any ideas what i can do to get out of this mess

Ashtray88 · #2 25th March 2009, 15:13

You are probably making them think that those sort of things are not your style. i know it's unfair but do it with them first, but yourself out there as often as you can. If they are good friends, they will reciprocate. Don't feel like they don't care about you, make them care about what you are upto!

Ruby1 · #3 25th March 2009, 15:51

I love my friends to bits, often think about them and wonder how they are, sometimes when i'm feeling more likeable i'll even tell them how special they are to me but nethertheless i hope they always know they mean alot to me.

I bet your mates love you to bits too and just like me often think of you, my mum has friends that she only speaks to every few months but they've been mates for many years and know in times of trouble they are there for eachother.

It's hard when you have sa to make the first moves, to think will they want to hear from me, i'm terrible for worrying bout things like that, but yeah i bet your mates care far more than they show.

jludvig · #4 25th March 2009, 15:58

i do text them quite a bit half the time they dont even reply!

stripeymouse · #5 25th March 2009, 16:19

some friends are crap like that - i think everyone wants different things from their friends. Maybe you want more of a family-ish, support each other type of friendship and they're more into casual, hanging out type friendship? The only thing i can suggest is enjoy these ones for what they are and try to find others to fill the other needs you have - i know that aint easy tho

Ruby1 · #6 25th March 2009, 16:44

Quote:

Originally Posted by jludvig

i do text them quite a bit half the time they dont even reply!

Sometimes texts don't always require a reply, i know i sometimes think to meself, are they wanting me to respond to that? if i respond will they then think 'oh bugger now i have to chat with Sarah Ruby' but if they are the sort of texts that are obvious you want to talk it's hard and i can see why it gets you down, i'd agree with stripeymouse sometimes mates are as you say crappy that way, we shouldn't take it to heart and theres lots of folks out there who would be the sort of mate who will repy.

Ashtray88 · #7 25th March 2009, 17:05

Oh yea, I get that sometimes too, the not replying to texts things. Try to speak to them on msn or facebook or something.

*bambi* · #8 25th March 2009, 17:07

Wish I knew the answer to that. I had a really crap week last week, and the worst part of it was that I felt so alone through it all. Thankfully things improved, but not through the help of friends...
Maybe it was just a problem that needed to be solved and I did that myself, but still it would have been nice if a friend had been there for me. Maybe I don't give people the chance to, wish I knew.

It also annoys me when others don't appreciate my being caring - a colleague at work seemed very down yesterday and I sent her a text saying comforting words, and offering to be there if she wanted to talk, she didn't even react to it and today mostly ignored me at work. That did make me feel a bit silly.

stripeymouse · #9 25th March 2009, 17:55

Quote:

Originally Posted by *bambi*

It also annoys me when others don't appreciate my being caring - a colleague at work seemed very down yesterday and I sent her a text saying comforting words, and offering to be there if she wanted to talk, she didn't even react to it and today mostly ignored me at work. That did make me feel a bit silly.

aww bambi - that's tough but don't stop doing things like that, it's good to do them i think even if the other person doesn't respond - it doesn't always mean they didn't appreicate it, just that they don't know how to respond *hugs*