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#32
16th May 2021, 07:42
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Re: Do you ever feel a negative vibe from some people towards you?
I'm not sure that I would pick up on negative vibes, I'm unsure what that means, or what to look out for. (Perhaps it's best not knowing!) I just pre-assume that most people would rather spend time with other normal-er people than spend time with me lol
Instead, it feels like people see me as a lost puppy that they've found in a shrub, in serious need of looking after  .In all new situations I've been in, someone really friendly has noticed me and then sort of taken me under their wing - taking me along to places. They've never minded that I'm really chatty and silly with them but really quiet in a group. I've spent many nights out just sat with their friends like an awkward pebble  but they still invite me  they don't give up on me.Some people are just next level lovely
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#33
16th May 2021, 16:55
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Re: Do you ever feel a negative vibe from some people towards you?
One of the sad effects of SA is that people think you are arrogant and aloof when in fact the opposite is true. Or they assume you don't like them, or wish to be left alone, etc.
I had this experience at a boxing gym a few years ago. Contrary to what you might imagine, boxers are some of the kindest, nicest people you'll ever meet. But I held myself back and didn't speak to anyone. I also left in my sweaty gym gear rather than use the showers and changing room (where I'd have to talk to people). I remember a new guy starting who, within two sessions, had made more friends than me. In the end I left. I couldn't bear the feeling that I'd offended or upset people I liked and respected. ****ing SA.
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#35
17th May 2021, 09:34
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Re: Do you ever feel a negative vibe from some people towards you?
Yeah, that's a definite cruel aspect of SA - that it often makes it seem like the thing you want (connection, friendship) is something you are actively rejecting.
I guess it's some sort of automatic self defense mechanism? Make yourself look unapproachable to avoid people approaching you, even if you don't realise that's what you are doing. I think at heart, SA is a self preservation mechanism gone hay wire. Your brain things you are in danger so it puts up all it's barrier to stop you being "attacked"? They do say SA works on the primitive part of the brain that reacts on instinct rather than anything you've consciously thought out or planned to do.
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