In a bad mood

[Gomen]

I've been wanting to go see the new Rogue one movie. My family was waiting until my dad got off of work Thursday. So then today Carrie Fisher dies. This depressed me greatly and makes me not even want to go see the movie anymore.

I've been looking into info about the religion I've been a member of for years. (Parents brought me into it and we don't even go to the worship place that much anymore)Today I read something that really made me question it. So then I text somebody who is also in the religion who I met online. I showed him what me made me question it and he gave me an answer.

Now the answer he gave me didn't satisfy my questioning. In fact it made me question more. When I read it in my head I went (language)

F********

. That's not normally me it just sucked reading it. I would never use language like that around anyone.

Now I am deeply troubled into thinking what is the point of life, and all the good people that die and suffer. I have struggles in life but some don't even get a chance, I have it no where as bad as them. So many people die early in life because of diseases and accidents and after having no chance they turn to a speck of dust forever? What about women having abortions because it's "incovient" for them? Where's the justice?!