Um, hello...

[MissE7000]

Originally Posted by benny79

My major problem is talking to people, constantly thinking negative thoughts about myself and enduring social events, what I need is a kick up the bum and force myself into these situations that is the only way I'll overcome them. Therapy probably wouldn't help because I'm so negative I wouldn't listen to them and resort back to my miserable self, I suppose talking on here's a start. How have you been?

I think therapy would help you; it could help you address your negative thought processes. Even saying that you think therapy wouldn't work is very defeatist Maybe if you gave it go? Personally, putting myself in a social situation does not help me at all. This I think, is because I do not have the tools to deal with these situations yet, so constantly placing myself in them just causes me more stress.

Em x

[benny79]

You're probably right I still need to motivate myself to go and see a doctor and that's not that easy for me, putting things off is something I've been doing all my life

[MissE7000]

Originally Posted by benny79

You're probably right I still need to motivate myself to go and see a doctor and that's not that easy for me, putting things off is something I've been doing all my life

Is there anything we can do to help motivate you?

Em x

[Kitri]

Hi Emma, welcome to the site!

[MissE7000]

Originally Posted by Kitri

Hi Emma, welcome to the site!

Hello, and thank you! Raccoon is very cute

Em x

[benny79]

Not really I need to motivate myself, I did go out last night to a small social event with some mates it wasn't to bad, didn't speak to anyone I didn't know and there were a few occasions of silence where I didn't have a clue what to say but in all wasn't to bad. Have you done anything this weekend?

[MissE7000]

Originally Posted by benny79

Not really I need to motivate myself, I did go out last night to a small social event with some mates it wasn't to bad, didn't speak to anyone I didn't know and there were a few occasions of silence where I didn't have a clue what to say but in all wasn't to bad. Have you done anything this weekend?

Well that's a start isn't it? I just went to work- it was terrible, but I have to stress myself out and go because I need the money

Em x

[benny79]

I'm alright with work I'm a joiner so I don't really have to deal with people I just get on with my work, where do you work?

[MissE7000]

Originally Posted by benny79

I'm alright with work I'm a joiner so I don't really have to deal with people I just get on with my work, where do you work?

I wonder whether that's a good or bad thing. They say avoiding people is bad, but I find facing people is even worse. I work in one of the busiest high street shops in my town-Wilko's. And on the till... Bad bad bad...

Em x

[benny79]

I would say avoiding people is bad even though you hate it unconsciously it might be doing you good, compared to if you didn't see anyone you might be a lot worse, i spent 15 years working in a workshop so I only seen half a dozen people I think if I had to deal with the public from a younger age I might be different.

[MissE7000]

Originally Posted by benny79

I would say avoiding people is bad even though you hate it unconsciously it might be doing you good, compared to if you didn't see anyone you might be a lot worse, i spent 15 years working in a workshop so I only seen half a dozen people I think if I had to deal with the public from a younger age I might be different.

I don't think my work situation is good for me, maybe in a social situation it would do me good. I probably think it depends on the person. Maybe you're right about yourself, that isolating yourself in a workshop was the cause of your problem...Only a therapist could tell you that though.

Em x

[benny79]

Do you see a therapist?

[MissE7000]

Originally Posted by benny79

Do you see a therapist?

Not yet, I just need to give psychological services a call and I think they'll put me on a waiting list or whatever because I referred myself online. Just need to pluck up the courage to give them a call.

Em x

[benny79]

Maybe you could get the therapy and then give me therapy

[MissE7000]

Originally Posted by benny79

Maybe you could get the therapy and then give me therapy

If it actually helps...which I'm not too optimistic about really.

[benny79]

Neither am I doctors are only good at dishing out drugs that's probably why I'm in no rush to go see one

[MissE7000]

Originally Posted by benny79

Neither am I doctors are only good at dishing out drugs that's probably why I'm in no rush to go see one

I think they'd have to refer you to a specialist if you refused drugs.

x

[benny79]

Seeing one docs bad enough but getting passed around to different ones, I can't be doing with that, do your family and friends know about your sa?

[MissE7000]

Originally Posted by benny79

Seeing one docs bad enough but getting passed around to different ones, I can't be doing with that, do your family and friends know about your sa?

I know it will be hard, but if at the end of it you get help, it's probably worth it. No they don't know, I never told anyone. First person I told was the doctor because I needed anti-anxiety meds to cope with work. It was getting to the point that I couldn't deal with it, stressing out too much.

x

[benny79]

None of my mates know either I'd feel pathetic telling them, the thing is they're good mates and would probably want to help, I don't like asking for help I've always done things for myself, I hate rejection to so that stops me from asking for things

[benny79]

Do you go out with mates to pubs and clubs

[MissE7000]

Originally Posted by benny79

None of my mates know either I'd feel pathetic telling them, the thing is they're good mates and would probably want to help, I don't like asking for help I've always done things for myself, I hate rejection to so that stops me from asking for things

It's whether they'd understand though too, because people tend to judge what they don't understand. And mental health problems are still taboo in society.

I do go out to pubs occasionally but have to get drunk so fast so I can talk to people properly.

x

[benny79]

I don't that much anymore so I stay relatively sober when I'm out which isn't good, do you have loads of negative thoughts before going out?

[MissE7000]

Originally Posted by benny79

I don't that much anymore so I stay relatively sober when I'm out which isn't good, do you have loads of negative thoughts before going out?

Yes, sometimes I stress so much that I cancel and say I'm ill or something. And when I am out I just get so depressed thinking about all the people around me...

x

[benny79]

Sometimes when I'm out I can be doing alright, talking to my mates never strangers and then all of a sudden my mind will go blank and I haven't got a clue what to say then I'll start getting depressed and want to go home, if I don't know what to say to mates what do you say to strangers?

[MissE7000]

Originally Posted by benny79

Sometimes when I'm out I can be doing alright, talking to my mates never strangers and then all of a sudden my mind will go blank and I haven't got a clue what to say then I'll start getting depressed and want to go home, if I don't know what to say to mates what do you say to strangers?

Yes I know, it's just so awkward. I'm the opposite when I'm out and just chat a load of crap. I can see people all giving me weird looks because I just don't shut up because I hate awkward silences, I feel the need to fill them, with anything.


x

[benny79]

Anything's better than nothing, I wonder what's in dutch courage that enables us to speak, they should put it in pill form.

[MissE7000]

Originally Posted by benny79

Anything's better than nothing, I wonder what's in dutch courage that enables us to speak, they should put it in pill form.

You know what, there probably is a pill like that on some dodgy website or something. But you wouldn't want to have to take it all the time though

x

[benny79]

I can see the logo now, Talking pills once you pop you can't shut up.

[benny79]

What have you done today?