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  #31  
Old 13th July 2014, 22:17
Custard_cream Custard_cream is offline
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Default Re: Hi everyone

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Originally Posted by thetalkingstove
I think its just a matter of finding people on the same wavelength to hang out with...and that doesn't necessarily mean a sibling. I know a few people who have plenty of friends but don't see their brothers and sisters much as they're just not similar people.

I wouldn't worry that it says anything about you
Thanks, I haven't had friends for the last 16 years, since I was 10, I hope to one day find some people who I feel comfortable with and can just do normal things like going shopping, going for a few drinks, having a girls night in etc., part of me worries that because I haven't grown up with friends I have missed out on some of the best years and also that I haven't developed good social skills too because of barely speaking to anyone for most of my life apart from my family.
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  #32  
Old 13th July 2014, 22:44
Custard_cream Custard_cream is offline
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Originally Posted by purplerose
Hi custard cream

If i get asked what im doing at the weekend i too always answer with " i dont know yet" like im actually going to be making plans when i know full well i will be sat at home all weekend and pretty much all week with no plans!!

i avoid speaking about personal things to i find it awkward.

i understand how awkward it can be not knowing what to say to people and having those awkward silences but i now try and tell myself that its not down to just me to keep a conversation going so dont worry so much.
Hi Purplerose, it's awful isn't it having to lie just to make it sound like you might be doing something at the weekend.

I also find discussing personal stuff awkward. Do you find that it is easier to discuss someone else rather than your own personal things? I tend to get asked about what my sister is doing, her work etc when the person asking doesn't even know her....maybe they do that because they just haven't got a clue what to say to me?

I really hate awkward silences, I don't know whether the other person realises, but I never know where to look and start fidgeting. I think it is so obvious when I'm worrying about what to say, part of me feels like saying to the other person if they are getting bored then I don't mind if they want to leave...I sometimes feel like people only join me because they feel like they have to.
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  #33  
Old 13th July 2014, 22:53
thetalkingstove thetalkingstove is offline
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Default Re: Hi everyone

Quote:
Originally Posted by Custard_cream
Thanks, I haven't had friends for the last 16 years, since I was 10, I hope to one day find some people who I feel comfortable with and can just do normal things like going shopping, going for a few drinks, having a girls night in etc., part of me worries that because I haven't grown up with friends I have missed out on some of the best years and also that I haven't developed good social skills too because of barely speaking to anyone for most of my life apart from my family.
I can certainly sympathise with feeling a lack of social skills! Or 'traditional' social skills, anyway. Chatting on here is socialising, even if it doesn't necessarily lead to nights out.
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  #34  
Old 14th July 2014, 02:47
CherriBlossom CherriBlossom is offline
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Default Re: Hi everyone

Hey Custard Cream
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  #35  
Old 14th July 2014, 18:51
Custard_cream Custard_cream is offline
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Default Re: Hi everyone

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Hey Custard Cream


Hi CherriBlossom, how are you?
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  #36  
Old 18th July 2014, 21:58
purplerose purplerose is offline
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Default Re: Hi everyone

Quote:
Originally Posted by Custard_cream
Hi Purplerose, it's awful isn't it having to lie just to make it sound like you might be doing something at the weekend.

I also find discussing personal stuff awkward. Do you find that it is easier to discuss someone else rather than your own personal things? I tend to get asked about what my sister is doing, her work etc when the person asking doesn't even know her....maybe they do that because they just haven't got a clue what to say to me?

I really hate awkward silences, I don't know whether the other person realises, but I never know where to look and start fidgeting. I think it is so obvious when I'm worrying about what to say, part of me feels like saying to the other person if they are getting bored then I don't mind if they want to leave...I sometimes feel like people only join me because they feel like they have to.
It is awful especially as every night of the week not just the weekend im stuck inside with no plans.

I have to agree it's definitely easier to talk about others ( probably because they have stuff going on in their life's which u can talk about but when it comes to talking about yourself there's nothing to discuss because of lack of friends, socialising and hobbies etc)

Awkward silences are the worst especially when you want to go but are to scared to say your going to go now.
Does your sister have social anxiety ?
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  #37  
Old 19th July 2014, 13:21
Custard_cream Custard_cream is offline
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Default Re: Hi everyone

Quote:
Originally Posted by purplerose
It is awful especially as every night of the week not just the weekend im stuck inside with no plans.

I have to agree it's definitely easier to talk about others ( probably because they have stuff going on in their life's which u can talk about but when it comes to talking about yourself there's nothing to discuss because of lack of friends, socialising and hobbies etc)

Awkward silences are the worst especially when you want to go but are to scared to say your going to go now.
Does your sister have social anxiety ?
No, my sister is the complete opposite of me. Lots of friends, I think nearly three years younger and had a few boyfriends too, one long term...saw her yesterday and she was telling me that she had signed up to a dating website and had met up with someone - would actually love to do that, but hardly an advert is it, socially awkward and won't have a clue what to say? Would be one of the last things I'd ever do!

Had lots of awkward silences this week - partly created them myself though as not really been in the mood for speaking. Even when I do speak though even the day after the conversation I can end up feeling mega anxious about what I actually said and whether the person thinks I am weird and what they think about what I said - do you feel like that too?
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