Alternatives to the pub vs. being shut in the cave

[hollowone]

Hi again,

I would appreciate any suggestions of social activities or things that can be done during the weekends that could have a social element that doesn't involve drinking.

The problem with going out is that it requires friends; friends who are increasingly unavailable, or who flake-out at the last minute. I don't want ot go out into town on my own, too scary, done it before, didn't like it one bit. Equally, I hate being shut in the house, especially if it's day after day after day.

I don't understand why there's no groups on meetup that meet during the weekends. Is it assumed that everyone's got a busy social schedule? What about people in my boat that don't want to be imprisoned in the house at the whim of a friend's decision.

Are you supposed to love being a lonely workoholic in this country?

*mini rant*
Why is it that people make less and less time for friends and family? Why do people prioritise being busy? Why do you have to make appointments to see friends these days? Why can't there be places where you can drop-into to semi-guarantee seeing familiar faces, such as the couchsurfing meet? Why are there no informal social opoprtunities (except for loud pubs, but that don't count).

How come, when people decide they're
It's so ****ing infonvenient

Why does no-one give a ****ing shit about the levels of social disconnection in this country? Am I the only one that kicks-up a fuss or feels this way?

Why is meeting members of the opposite sex confined to online dating? Simple, people these days lack social opportunities to meet people through friends-of-friends. Everyne drives everywhere, everything's done online, including things like shopipng, the post and everything else that can have a social element. All those opportunities to get to know nodding acquaintences which could be doorways into new social circles are sealed shut.

People don't go to pubs to meet peopel anymore, it's all about getting pissed to escape the daily grind. The only places that are not like that are those frequented by a much older crowd.

[umm]

I bang on about it enough, and this post will be no different: cycling. It can be solitary, with occasional social dips if desired. It is very good for you and you get to see nice parts of the countryside, and it's not some mental drinking club but pretty much a normal person's activity. The cost of it can be spread out over months if need be. I cannot fault it.

[hollowone]

RE

If there are meetup groups where you are but not meeting when or where you want to, or doing the type of meets you want, have you considered either hosting an event yourself

don't know how to go about the and the commitment but..

or suggesting an event to the Organizer?

Yes I have thought about that. Proposing a games night (board games, such as uno, jungle-speed, card games etc.) as a social opportunity. That's how the couchsurfing meet started.

I bang on about it enough, and this post will be no different: cycling. It can be solitary, with occasional social dips if desired.

Yeh, I do enough of it myself. Wish I had a nice young woman to join me.

By 'informal social opportunities' I was really referring to things that you could just drop into, where there might be a core of regulars, not necessarily pubs, but this includes drop-in groups, meet-up groups and the couchsurfing groups. Places where you're bound to bump-tinot people who are regulars, get to know their social circles.

What I meant about pubs was that these days, they are not used as such avenues, they're used just to get pissed as a fart and escape the grind, not as a social 'third place'. It's only older people that use them that way and it's only older people that you can have decent conversations with.

RE

I bang on about it enough, and this post will be no different: cycling. It can be solitary, with occasional social dips if desired.

This is one of my favourite activities, and a good mood booster in and of itself. I just wish I had people to join me on rides. I do join a local ccling club on rides on Tuesday nights, depending on where they do rides and accessibility. It's my mates dad's working mens' club, so socially, it's all middle-aged men. would be nice to have a woman to go on rides with, go exploring the countryside, but such is not accessible. I might as well be stranded on top of a mountain or stuck inside a submarine.

Was in a pub tonight, surrounded by plenty of women. As far as social connections and social circles go, reasons to start conversations goes; I felt so distant, that I might as well be in a submarine under the arctic looking at pictures. That's how far-removed I feel from meeting new people. This last paragraph is bringing-up a slightly different note from the OP.

[les]

Have you tried looking at the groups and associations page for your area on gumtree ? it may be worth a look