#1
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Loneliness
I know this can be a problem for some. I am quite happy with my own company most of the time. It is good to see family but I don’t make a great effort,or really any effort at all,to meet other people. I am quite asocial.
I think some of my asociality is a defensive response to finding social interaction difficult. |
#2
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Re: Loneliness
^
yip, could have written that myself, It's a sad situation, to be so affected by the social side of things that we tend to prefer isolation as it feels easier to bear, I do feel though, that given the right company, you can socialize and still be at ease and nourished by the experience, I think, that whilst solitude can feel like a freedom (from the stress of interaction ) the long term accumulative emotions involved in solitude can be a cause of breakdown and an erosion of mental health, Kind of like a creeping, unseen danger,.....something that feels like pleasure initially but that becomes a trap, a slow erosion of who we are and who we could be. |
#3
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Re: Loneliness
I, too, am happy with my own company. But, as Vasco said, is the comfort we feel in our solitude paid for at the expense of our erosion of our mental health? I'm currently at the stage where meaningful social interaction with others is a non-starter, so asociality is my default position.
Because it's comfortable for me to be like this, I feel like I don't want to break out of this situation, but I know that I must at some point in order to progress in terms of being able to cope with others. It's taking the steps to getting to that point that scares me. |
#4
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Re: Loneliness
Quote:
And it isn't only shyness. People get their self-esteem from how they feel they compare to others. When they meet someone funnier, taller, cleverer, richer, more successful, better looking, etc, it crushes their self-esteem. That's why so much human interaction is tense and uneasy. Often, the tension can barely be concealed and flashes out in spiteful remarks or even violence. The vast majority of people couldn't get through a party, or a family gathering at xmas, without a drink, or drug, or both. Plus, of course, at least a third of people are so repulsive or so ****ing dull that they aren't worth meeting. Others are simply not on your wavelength and so you end up feeling lonely and empty when you try to communicate with them. I would love a close circle of good friends – kind, funny, self-mocking people who don't take life or themselves seriously. But if it came to a choice between being on my own and socializing with someone I don't much like, I'd choose isolation. |
#5
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Re: Loneliness
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But at the same time, the past seems a far less forgiving place - I can imagine living somewhere like a British village in the 1950s (or before), if you were the slightest bit 'different', you'd probably feel completely ostracized. I get the impression everyone had to act the same in those days. |
#6
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Re: Loneliness
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