Low self-esteem is making my life impossible

[Clockface]

I'm feeling really fed up with myself right now. In fact I feel like this often. Every day of my life is a constant feeling of not being good enough for the world, feeling hated by everybody and people not wanting to know me. I live a boring existence due to lack of money, despite working full time, but even if I was leading a more interesting life, such as owning a house or travelling abroad, I would still be hating myself for who I am. Even if I try and pick out a few good things about myself, they are just overridden by all the things that are wrong with me and those that highlight that I'm simply not good enough. I feel as if my friends think about me and just shake their heads in disappointment. I feel like I'm not good enough for my girlfriend, and I'm terrified of losing her. I feel sad and fed up most of the time and zone out a lot due to my feelings so I can't concentrate on anything.

I can't bear the thought of living like this for the rest of my life but at the same time I can't change my opinion of myself and stop people being disappointed in me. I hate myself!