She's Out of My League / He's Out of My League

[Laura Palmer]

^

[black_mamba]

I think the idea of 'leagues' is pure bullshit.

Originally Posted by Benfica

I don't see anyone as 'out of my league'. I just don't see it in those terms. I know there are millions of women who wouldn't bother with me, but there are millions of women I'd not bother with too.

If I thought in terms of 'leagues' I'd never have got any partners. But I don't, and I've had a fair few partners in my time.

Others may think in terms of 'leagues', and may see me as out of theirs, but I don't see myself as out of anyone's league. I only want to be with people who want to be with me too, so the rest don't matter anyway.

If you pitch yourself as being out of someone's league, it's no surprise if/when they see you in that way.

What he said.

If you believe in leagues, then you are putting pointless barriers up. If there were such a thing, how on earth did I manage to get boyfriends when I'd never worn a skirt or pair of high heels in my life (so poo-poo to your girly girly generalisation Cynic) ... it's called confidence and self-esteem, believing in yourself and being proud of yourself.

[SoulSeeker]

Hmm this is such a tough question..just dont know what to think anymore really. Maybe that's down to lack of living, experience.

Looks wise..i think it's a lot harder to say someone is out of your/my league.

But for me..persoanlity..i sometimes feel really inferior. I cant believe how little i know though. I mean i do have interests..but i dont really have any depth of knowledge...that's not my fault..it's just the way i am.

I want to do things in life..it's just that i havent done anything yet..which makes my persoanlity come across as awkward sometimes.

As attraction is an all round package..well i suppose i do feel inferior to others sometimes. But those others who i may feel inferior to..have to be on the same level looks wise as myself or better looking (in my eyes) Weird ? yeah maybe.

But..it's soo complicated..because you never really are sure how you match against others (opposite sex) initial looks wise. Then personality comes into it..which just makes it even more complicated.

I think if you have good charm and you're at least a little intersting..or 'willing'..then anything is possible. I wouldn't say everybody can possibly match up 'looks wise' (imo)..though i do think quite a bit is possible to break down that intial looks barrier..and be drawn in by other areas.

[black_mamba]

A league implies that there is an objective definition of beauty and attractiveness.


There isn't.

Cynic can huff and puff all he wants about men wanting girly girls and girls wanting manly men, but with all due respect, his cynical views are just too extreme and overly-generalised to be accurate.

[Defiance]

I actually agree with cavegirl *shock/horror


as for girly girls/manly men ... as long as the girl doesn't come accross overly masculine like butch and the guy doesn't come accross as camp i don't think it will put of the masses

[diplodocus]

^ Yeah agree with her too but I don't think it's just physical. It's stupid to think that Notting Hill could happen in real life, it's very very unlikely. That films defines someone who gets with someone who is way out of their league. In reality it happens hardly at all if ever. Someone like Salmon Rushdie is never going to date an uneducated chav even one as gorgeous as say Cheryl Cole.

But like CaveGirl said people who are obsessed with leagues are probably more than likely narrowing down their options far too much.

[Detox]

This man, the exception to leagues and standards.

[black_mamba]

Originally Posted by Cynic

Because you're fit as fuck!

Bless ya, but I'm very plain looking and always have been. Esp compared to those slutty carbon-copy bimbos in Colsey's post above. :rolleyes: (And no, I'm not putting myself down, I just think they're so *vom*)

Easier said and done if you got nowt to be proud of.

If I were you I'd be proud. What's the big deal? It's not like you have anything monstrously wrong with you, you seem intelligent but you let yourself down with all the negativity.

[Detox]

Originally Posted by black_mamba

Esp compared to those slutty bimbos in Colsey's post above.

But not everyone likes those slutty bimbo types believe it or not.
Its a common thing that guys are expected to like women who look like that, and like big boobs and things... personally I hate big knockers.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and all that. Everyone has different 'tastes'.

[black_mamba]

Originally Posted by Colsey

Everyone has different 'tastes'.

That's what I mean by leagues being impossible. Leagues don't exist. Even if what some other people said is unlikely to happen (very stereotypically hot woman with a stereotypically ugly bloke) it is still not impossible.

[Defiance]

Originally Posted by Colsey

This man, the exception to leagues and standards.

hugh hefner has like millions or billions of dollars. that is not a good example because the average man can't relate.

[Detox]

Originally Posted by Defiance

hugh hefner has like millions or billions of dollars. that is not a good example because the average man can't relate.

Thats why I said he was the exception.

[diplodocus]

Originally Posted by Colsey

This man, the exception to leagues and standards.

No he's not! For one he's loaded and second he's loaded! :rolleyes:
Oh yeah and he's a 'sweetie'. He does have an inescapable charm. Charisma and money goes a long way. Plus he runs a little magazine which makes or breaks these young ladies careers. He's not an exception he proves the rule.

Originally Posted by black_mamba

That's what I mean by leagues being impossible. Leagues don't exist. Even if what some other people said is unlikely to happen (very stereotypically hot woman with a stereotypically ugly bloke) it is still not impossible.

Virtually nothing is impossible but how many stereotypically hot men with stereotypically ugly woman can you think of? Can someone, anyone name me a famous example? And no Victoria Beckham doesn't count!

[Defiance]

get yer coat mamba..

[black_mamba]

Originally Posted by Cynic

Ahem...and do you come here often?

Stop putting yourself down god dammit

Originally Posted by Defiance

get yer coat mamba..

[Kevin Hodge]

Originally Posted by diplodocus

Virtually nothing is impossible but how many stereotypically hot men with stereotypically ugly woman can you think of? Can someone, anyone name me a famous example? And no Victoria Beckham doesn't count!

this doesn't necessarily reflect my personal views, but a lot of people rant about the coupling of beautiful, dead heart-throb kurt cobain, with courtney love.


i'm not much of a fan of hers, but i would stop well short of calling anyone ugly. glass houses and so on

[black_mamba]

Originally Posted by diplodocus

Virtually nothing is impossible but how many stereotypically hot men with stereotypically ugly woman can you think of? Can someone, anyone name me a famous example? And no Victoria Beckham doesn't count!

Why does it have to be a famous example? Media only give a shit about stereotypically attractive people anyway. I've seen a few rare examples in my life but they were just couples walking down the street. Who cares if they're famous or not, nothing is impossible, you said it yourself.

[diplodocus]

Originally Posted by black_mamba

Why does it have to be a famous example? Media only give a shit about stereotypically attractive people anyway. I've seen a few rare examples in my life but they were just couples walking down the street. Who cares if they're famous or not, nothing is impossible, you said it yourself.

Because I wouldn't know a none famous couple ( I said 'virtually nothing is impossible' I worded it very carefully!)

[Kevin Hodge]

oh - and i think there was mass hatred re the looks of a certain mrs john lennon, but i personally don't see what the problem was seems more like a form of racism than anything else :rolleyes:

[diplodocus]

Originally Posted by seth brundle

oh - and i think there was mass hatred re the looks of a certain mrs john lennon, but i personally don't see what the problem was seems more like a form of racism than anything else :rolleyes:

I didn't see any guys complaining about Yoko. I mean she wasn't a stunner by any means but certainly no minger. I suspect racism and jealousy were the main reasons. Anyway John Lennon wasn't a stunner either.

[José Raúl Capablanca]

Originally Posted by Cynic

They've rejected me too, and it's only a matter of time before everyone here follows suit. :rolleyes:

I consider your our 'Dear Leader"

[diplodocus]

Originally Posted by seth brundle

this doesn't necessarily reflect my personal views, but a lot of people rant about the coupling of beautiful, dead heart-throb kurt cobain, with courtney love.


i'm not much of a fan of hers, but i would stop well short of calling anyone ugly. glass houses and so on

Well Courtney Love, I don't think she was a total minger by any means. I would.

Put it like this Courtney Love or Susan Boyle?

[Detox]

Originally Posted by black_mamba

So called 'ugly' women are treated like monsters in the media, yet 'ugly' men garner no special attention. :rolleyes:

I think bad mouthing people simply based on their looks is disgusting.

Well men are meant to be ugly.
Major pressure on women to be thin and beautiful these days.

[Defiance]

i've noticed beautiful european women (more than any other race) seem to go for men who would be considered well below thier league

[black_mamba]

Originally Posted by Colsey

Well men are meant to be ugly.
Major pressure on women to be thin and beautiful these days.

Sorry I deleted the post, realised it was totally off topic.

[diplodocus]

Originally Posted by Defiance

i've noticed beautiful european women (more than any other race) seem to go for men who would be considered well below thier league

I think that has a lot to do with Socio-economic background. Just look for a pretty thai mail order bride walking about with some middle aged paedo mofo walking about your local supermarket.

[Kevin Hodge]

Originally Posted by diplodocus

I didn't see any guys complaining about Yoko. I mean she wasn't a stunner by any means but certainly no minger. I suspect racism and jealousy were the main reasons. Anyway John Lennon wasn't a stunner either.

i mean, i wasn't around at the time but i actually thought there was a huge and well known phenomenon of people hating everything about her, and one of the things people fixated on was her appearance.

anyway,as i said...i don't find anything wrong with how she looks. just says a lot about all the xenophobia in those days


as for lennon, its odd. is he really not handsome, is it all just a part of the legend? difficult to say. i suppose we could certainly say that looks or no, he was certainly attractive to a lot of people.

[Kevin Hodge]

Originally Posted by diplodocus

Well Courtney Love, I don't think she was a total minger by any means. I would.

Put it like this Courtney Love or Susan Boyle?

i don't consider this sort of thing very gentlemanly, but in all seriousness, susan boyle!

i must apologise, i think i'm perhaps prejudiced against druggy trampy sellouts

[Defiance]

Originally Posted by diplodocus

I think that has a lot to do with Socio-economic background. Just look for a pretty thai mail order bride walking about with some middle aged paedo mofo walking about your local supermarket.

worst i've seen is a white dude in his mid 50's with a borderline jailbait asian girl but i'll give him the benefit of the doubt and assume she was 16

[Kevin Hodge]

Originally Posted by CaveGirl

Life is hard the further you are from the ideal western aesthetic really , all Beatles girlfriend's were going to be disliked but with Yoko it went further in my opinion.
I see it in black girls all the time as we have it programmed in to us that we aren't attractive from a young age (I escaped it and developed issues for other reasons) and I object to people who lighten their skin , wear blue contacts and wigs!
There are quite a lot of ethnic men who still view white women as a top of the tree trophy and everyone else second best.
It's a complex issues and slightly off topic so I should hush as I am almost looking for a soabox to stand on and need sleep soon:rolleyes:

because of where i've lived, i've never been surrounded by a very diverse ethnic background, its interesting to hear about this from "someone i know"

the media certainly seems to know what it likes :rolleyes: i always had the idea tho that what people are like on a person to person basis is very different from the fascist tunnel vision exhibited by the media.