Anyone else find the world of work absolutely impossible to defeat with anxiety?

[bey0ndanxious]

Yes, I’m making another thread about work! It’s quite obvious where my anxiety is triggered most haha. My last thread “work is getting too much” has officially gotten too much. I had a panic attack last night and decided enough was enough. I’m quitting. Disappointed in myself already in saying this, but I’ve come too far with uni to go back ten steps by forcing myself to work even though it’s making me feel physically sick every day. The last time I did that I dropped out of school and didn’t leave my room for a year. So in an effort to keep some of my sanity and emotional stability I’ve decided to pack it in. I’m already struggling to withhold from beating myself up about this and can’t manage to ignore the inner bully telling me I’m the worst, most laziest, weakling in the universe. Rational right? I’m aware this isn’t positive and it’s in my best interest but I still hate myself for this. Anyone else torn between the rational side and evil voice in their head telling them they’re useless?

[bey0ndanxious]

Originally Posted by jinny

totally.



every single day I go to work is a long and exhausting battle. I manage to get myself there, but as if it's not enough that I drag myself in everyday I spend all day internally telling myself how rubbish I am at every single bit of my job. Even though it's a job I don't really want or enjoy & I know I'm not good at I can't help beating myself up about that all day every day.

I have the exact same problem Jinny. But you know what? At least you manage to drag yourself there. I’ve failed at my last job- quit after three months of doing what you’re doing. I just couldn’t drag myself there anymore, it become too suffocating. The entire day spent worry about going to work, being at work and going home to worry about going back the next day. It’s so bad.

[Sphinx]

Work has always been the biggest problem for me anxiety wise. Though I suppose it's because I just struggle to be around people generally for any great length of time.

I just go completely into my head, suffer quite badly from derealization and end up clueless as to what's going on around me.

I find the workplace a bit traumatic actually, from all of the times I've had panic attacks and not been able to cope. It's something that bothers me a lot as it means I get a lot of judgement from people being unemployed. I've tried so many times but feel like I can't cope.

I'm trying to just get used to being around people in the hope that I'll get there one day.

[bey0ndanxious]

Me too, @Sphinx - my main issue is work. I’ve tried so many times and each time it comes to a point where I can’t cope anymore. Uncontrollable panic attacks, daily, multiple times a day actually! Almost as bad is my paranoia and shame for not having a job and what people think of me for this. The stigma surrounding mental health and unemployment is so overwhelming.

[bey0ndanxious]

Originally Posted by jinny

I've only been working in my current job for 3 months too. It's a supply role & I think it's coming to the end soon, I seem to have been moved into a different role to the one I was given (which was long term)...my original role has been given to another person from the same agency & I am now just waiting for a permanent member of staff to come back from being off sick before I finish. That makes me feel rubbish, but I have been doing my best, it's just with severe social anxiety, my best is always going to be quite poor.

What will you do after this role comes to an end? Do you have another job at the same company lined up or will you have to do the whole job search again from scratch?

[choirgirl]

Ack. I wrote a long post. What happened to it?

I've never really got over this problem. It's pretty much ruined my life - that and high housing costs. I try and deal with it by taking on jobs with little social interaction and responsibility, but that means low pay. Low pay means I can't move forward with my life, just scrape by.

I am wondering if medication is the answer. Maybe I just need to be medicated up to cope with the workplace. I used to think that was mad, even when I was aware it was even an issue. But the workplace is designed so the majority can cope with it, albeit badly, not the minority of anxious people. So maybe it is the answer. The trouble is when I read about anxiety meds, it seems like they expect people to come off them. I would see this as necessary to hold down a normal job without having some breakdown eventually and maybe do better in the workplace. I'm not sure I'm ready to take the plunge yet, what with side effects and what have you. I'm just getting my head around thinking I actually need to change who I am just to function properly in society.

[sillypenguin]

I want to be able to hold down a job but it's just far too difficult and exhausting and not only feeds my anxiety but makes me depressed as well. Surely this shouldn't be a normal reaction to working.

I'm pretty sure I'm going to quit my current job, might get another extension of my sick line as there's no way I feel like I could go bk so soon and hopefully give me time to look for another job. I'll probably just go bk to temping cos at least it's means to an end and will give me some pennies at least.

[Selina Kyle]

Can relate to all of this. Because of anxiety and other issues the only jobs I've ever felt able to do are ones which have as little social interaction as possible, this obviously severely limits what options i have and generally means low paid stuff like cleaning, factory work etc. While these pay the bills they're not the most mentally stimulating and feel like i could have achieved alot more in my life if it hadn't been for the issues that i have. Don't know whether this is something i could have changed or worked on to improve, maybe nipping it in the bud when i was younger, but i don't know, i don't think i had the necessary will and determination to do it when i was younger and doing anything about it now feels insurmountable :/

Pretty unhappy in current job, i work on my own most of the time which i suppose i should be happy about, but working on your own all the time also has its downsides, and isn't probably the way to go if you want to overcome your issues, especially if, like me, you don't have much of a social life either. Have been trying to think of some other jobs i could do, maybe starting my own business of some sort, but feels like a fairly daunting prospect atm, and have no idea what i would do anyway. Guess job i'm doing just now would be alright if i had more going on outside work, if i had friends and things to do, suppose at the end of the day majority of jobs are just a means to an end, a way to pay the bills, guess they shouldn't necessarily be the thing which our entire lives revolve around.

Sorry for being so negative, wish i had something more productive to say. Just wanted to say i can relate. Can relate to the negative inner voice thing as well. Think mindfulness is supposed to help with this kind of thing, not getting attached to what the voice in your head is saying, just letting it come and go and not latch on to it. Think it's mindfulness anyway. Meditation probably helps too, just 'being' with whatever it is you're thinking and not attaching any meaning to it, because the majority of things we think don't have any meaning at all, it's just noise.

Anyway, hope things improve for you soon. Don't beat yourself up about having to leave your job, your health and mental wellbeing come first, no job is worth making yourself ill over.