What was the worst period of your life?

[choirgirl]

The uncertainty must be so difficult.

[Chess&Junkfood]

^^

[kirbycrackle]

^^^ Jesus. That’s awful. Hope you’re all okay.

[newbs16]

^^^^ I hope you start to all feel better soon.

[Consolida]

@ Nanuq It sounds like a horrendous situation to be in. I hope you soon start to see some light at the end of the tunnel, physically and mentally xx

[twosocks]

Last year.
This year is pants but last year i was in a really difficult place that i barely managed to crawl out of.
I thought 2017 & 2018 were bad but they were just building up to it.
I spent a good 5 years as a teenager barely speaking to anybody with no internet which was tough. I read books from the library and walked my dog. As isolating as that was and as down as i got i adjusted and most of the time was spent in a rather monotonous sheltered boring bubble with pages of escapism. As hard as it was it was still a much simpler time back then.

[ynwa247]

Right now I had a breakdown in January and my motivation has been sapped since.

Between 16-24, 22/23 were better than 18, but the lack of urgency or awareness I have now is super harsh. Since I've tried my best but my mind isn't being nice to me.

[Utopia]

I would say right now, comes and goes a bit.... I can't even concentrate anymore I just can't deal with my emotions anymore, I just wish they would switch off completely at this point it is too painful to witness. I am just hated by literally everyone I have ever known it just didn't make any sense why? It really isn't in my nature to be cruel, but it is even brainwashing me because if people just abused me, left right and center, my whole life, why bother helping others? There really isnt any other reason I would think to want to vote right wing.

I have never felt so miserable and alone.

[Consolida]

I don't quite know what to say, other than you aren't alone in feeling this way

If you feel that you have been misunderstood by people most of your life it's hardly surprising if you end up feeling disappointed, hurt and cynical. We are naturally a very social species and every single one of us needs love and acceptance to thrive. If this isn't forthcoming we will inevitably feel rejected and very isolated and close ourselves off to future social interactions for self protection. It can all become a vicious circle...

All I can say, is that there are people in this world who will understand and accept you, Utopia, so don't you go giving up on the human race just yet

Hope some of that made sense!

[Lone Dog]

Now seems like a good answer to this. It's the result of the accumulation of all the problems and failures of your life. With a virus being the icing on the cake.

[3stacks]

Hm the "life" part of it

[mossieman]

Basically from 7 yrs old to 55 yrs old and counting with the odd short periods of not so bad.

[Orwell20]

Originally Posted by mossieman

Basically from 7 yrs old to 55 yrs old and counting with the odd short periods of not so bad.

Same. But for me it's 7 to 43 (i.e now). Life has changed at each stage, but only from one kind of unhappiness to another.

[Utopia]

Originally Posted by Consolida

I don't quite know what to say, other than you aren't alone in feeling this way

If you feel that you have been misunderstood by people most of your life it's hardly surprising if you end up feeling disappointed, hurt and cynical. We are naturally a very social species and every single one of us needs love and acceptance to thrive. If this isn't forthcoming we will inevitably feel rejected and very isolated and close ourselves off to future social interactions for self protection. It can all become a vicious circle...

All I can say, is that there are people in this world who will understand and accept you, Utopia, so don't you go giving up on the human race just yet

Hope some of that made sense!

Thank you consolida - don't ever feel you've done the wrong thing by offering support.

This is a very unproductive way to be feeling, I'm really not convinced that many people suffer quite like this, Im sure some do, but I have depression about as severe as it possibly could get , I am treating it but Im also very alone and people in my life have just abused me in any possible way they feel they can get away with. I mean if you knew how I felt you would realise I am disabled by my emotional state. I think my GP realises and is surprised with the progress I have made. I haven't given up though because it can be reversed, but personally I think I will need ECT to reset things, as well as some external improvements, which really hasn't been helped by this pandemic.

[Consolida]

^ As someone who has suffered with severe depression off (and more often on) for a very long time I can relate very much to what you are saying Utopia.

At its worst (like now) I almost feel physically paralysed by the depression and struggle to even get out of bed. I used to think the depression was caused by external events and unfulfilling or toxic interactions with others but I'm not so sure anymore. My life is better than its ever been in that I now have a husband and son that I love dearly and who reciprocate that love, but the depression is as bad as ever. It's so ingrained in my psyche that I don't think I'll ever be free of it. Even though my life in many ways is in a much better place my thoughts persist in going back to all of the desperately unhappy and negative events of the past. I'm unable to move forward because I'm continuously looking back..

So, I would say that the worst period of my life is always right now, in the present, because the past continues to drag me down and the future fills me with absolute fear

[Rufus]

its probably the last year - to many things to mention and its not over yet - people say Im catastrophizing about the future but I in all probability, these things will happen

[Kipper]

It feels like the last 2 years have been. Became enamoured with a work colleague, felt she encouraged me but then changed her mind. Still see her most working days and it still hurts like hell.

[Ro26]

I would say my childhood was probably my lowest point, was very traumatic and difficult. But in some ways how I feel in myself atm is a sort of rockbottom, feel more anxious/depressed than I have in years :/