Collection of SA/self-help book recommendation threads and links to free CBT - Page 2

#31 20th October 2005, 23:11

I know there are lots of books about this subject, but I'm wondering if anyone here has read one and could recommend a good one?

pboy · #32 21st October 2005, 08:57

Just to bump this thread, I know there are books on amazon but I havent yet bought one. If I do I will report back.

OldBailey · #33 21st October 2005, 10:33

The main book on the subject is The Highly Sensitive Person by Elaine Aron. If you can relate to the stuff on the website it's definitely worth reading the book - although I don't agree with everything in the book.

I haven't read any of the other books. They seem to focus on one particular area (work, relationships, kids) so the Aron book is definitely the place to start.

#34 21st October 2005, 18:03

Thanks pboy and OldBailey.

That Elaine Aron book looks worth buying, and I definitely do relate to the stuff on the website.

mico · #35 23rd October 2005, 12:32

SA usually effects us pretty heavilly in some way on a daily basis. Most of this goes unnoticed since it's been part of your daily living for so many years. But every now and again you find yourself in a situation that really makes you wonder why you put up with it, highlighting the absurdity of the whole deal.

It's usually these very situations that motivate me, and right now, I'm motivated... I've come to a point where I really want to do something about it, but first I need my ammo. Over the next few weeks I'm planning on do all the research I can, before putting together a definitive guide.

So, firstly, I want to know what all the best books are, the cream of the crop, specific to SA?

mico

Fighter86 · #36 24th October 2005, 05:39

Quote:

Originally Posted by mico

SA usually effects us pretty heavilly in some way on a daily basis. Most of this goes unnoticed since it's been part of your daily living for so many years. But every now and again you find yourself in a situation that really makes you wonder why you put up with it, highlighting the absurdity of the whole deal.

mico

Ditto! I get this feeling from time to time as well.

I see a therapist so I don't know much 'bout self help books for SA. But I think there is a fairly popular audio 'therapy' that is invented by this Richard something or other. However, I heard its expensive. About 300 plus bucks I think...

reality · #37 24th October 2005, 11:09

Attacking Anxiety & Depression - Lucinda Bassett mp3's
Great set of MP3's these.

For those who know how to use torrents -

For those who dont know how to use torrents read the FAQ (frequentley asked questions) on the website.

jontyboyoh · #38 24th October 2005, 20:35

Quote:

Originally Posted by mico

SA usually effects us pretty heavilly in some way on a daily basis. Most of this goes unnoticed since it's been part of your daily living for so many years. But every now and again you find yourself in a situation that really makes you wonder why you put up with it, highlighting the absurdity of the whole deal.

It's usually these very situations that motivate me, and right now, I'm motivated... I've come to a point where I really want to do something about it, but first I need my ammo. Over the next few weeks I'm planning on do all the research I can, before putting together a definitive guide.

So, firstly, I want to know what all the best books are, the cream of the crop, specific to SA?

mico

I'm sure you have good intentions, Mico, but what do you hope to gain from this exercise. I've had similar ideas in the past, but risked disappearing up my own fundament. In my experience you can know everything about anxiety and depression etc, but unless you're willing to go out there and do it, its not worth a great deal.

Don't mean to p1ss on your bonfire, but there you are!

mico · #39 24th October 2005, 20:59

Thanks people.

Although I might look into the audio, especially the mp3's (I do like a good bargain

), I'm really looking into getting some reading material. I'm surprised no one's mentioned, well, any books yet

, I thought there may have been some comments on Gillian Butler's Overcoming Social Anxiety... etc. I'd appreciate some comments/reviews on these.

Quote:

Originally Posted by jontyboyoh

I'm sure you have good intentions, Mico, but what do you hope to gain from this exercise. I've had similar ideas in the past, but risked disappearing up my own fundament. In my experience you can know everything about anxiety and depression etc, but unless you're willing to go out there and do it, its not worth a great deal.

Don't mean to p1ss on your bonfire, but there you are!

I understand every word of this jonty, I really do. Plenty of times myself I've went over this idea, even posted something similar not so long back. But every day I get older, the more I want to do something about it, I refuse to live the rest of my days in fear. Over time, the motivation just gets stronger. For example, last time I wasn't even prepared to go down the book route because I would have felt so embarrassed if someone found them (partly an SA thing I think), but right now, I don't care. There have even been a few times lately where I've thought about subtly coming clean about my SA, which is not me, at all.

As for knowing everything about it...this is the exact reason I'm working on a plan. In the past 8 years I have learnt so much about my anxiety and myself I have almost become a different person. If you read many of my posts you'll probably notice that I tend to do a lot of thinking. Some of which makes sense, and other bits are so muddled up because my mind can be a mess at times, it's kinda like my bedroom, thoughts lying all over the floor. The knowledge is there, but no way to reference it.

So, I want to put a plan together, get it written down and have something I can put into action rather than sitting here thinking about it all day and not doing anything. It's all about the action. Give me a few weeks and I'll tell you if it was a good idea or not...

mico

pboy · #40 24th October 2005, 21:05

I can vouch for Personal Power 2, that first got me kickstarted in beating SA although ultimately it led me to burn out as I wanted to do "too much". Apart from that, Nicks posts from here and the other forum are very useful, and also 'Feel the fear and do it anyway'.

mico · #41 24th October 2005, 21:32

Thanks Pboy, I might 'obtain' PP from somewhere, a lot of talk about it on these forums, although I'm a little skeptical myself I guess you shouldn't knock it until you've tried it.

Feel the fear I think I recommended to you, that one's worn out now, a good read. I might even read it again if I have the spare time.

And as for Nick's post, I have a printout somewhere, which I'll be having a good read through.

mico

mico · #42 25th October 2005, 21:47

I've looked up some books on Amazon. Anyone read any of them? Have any comments?

Gillian Butlers book, I know there has been a lot of talk about it in the past:

Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/...797106-1806268

This came up in the little bit that says, 'like this, why not buy this as well?'. I'm not sure if their is any connection, but the author has worked on other books with Gillian Butler in the past, looks very similar to the above:

Overcoming Low Self-Esteem
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/...797106-1806268

How to Accept Yourself
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/...797106-1806268

Self-Esteem
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/...797106-1806268

Quantum psychology?? How cool does that sound?

I've included this one on that basis alone:

Quantum Consciousness: Guide to Experiencing Quantum Psychology
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/...797106-1806268

Self Consciousness: An Alternative Anthropology of Identity
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/...797106-1806268

I'm really interested in finding out more about self-consciousness, so any other recommendations on that front would be greatly appreciated. But reading the synopsis of this it sounds a very interesting read, an interesting theory indeed:

Quote:

Originally Posted by synopsis extract

Bermudez argues that a paradox (the paradox of self-consciousness) arises from the apparent strict interdependence between self-conscious thought and linguistic self-reference. The paradox renders circular all theories that define self-consciousness in terms of linguistic mastery of the first-person pronoun.

The Paradox of Self-consciousness
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/...797106-1806268

mico

craig · #43 17th December 2005, 18:39

G,day - can anyone recommend any claire weekes books (theres a few) or any in general

mico · #44 17th December 2005, 19:38

I have two. Self Help for your Nerves (which is good), and Essential Help for your Nerves (which is two books rolled into one, and it's also good).

Out of the two, I think I prefer Self Help. It's all good stuff and all the books seem to run along the same lines of thought.

mico

ivorthegalliant · #45 17th December 2005, 20:39

craig, i dont know if you are serious but if you are .one word.google.the name and youll get the lot.the trouble is reading books will not get rid of sa, unless you believe in education gets results.no, im an ex soldier, but reading is no good, you need to override the negatives and get yourself out there.i like this site because although void of life experiance the

majority are deep and thoughtfull people, but thats the trouble, **** you is my only answer, get out there, and be.live the life you deserve, stop with this deep, you only live once.the more you fight sa the more people will respect you.it sucks i know, but hell is where the shy live.

jontyboyoh · #46 18th December 2005, 12:09

Quote:

Originally Posted by ivorthegalliant

craig, i dont know if you are serious but if you are .one word.google.the name and youll get the lot.the trouble is reading books will not get rid of sa, unless you believe in education gets results.no, im an ex soldier, but reading is no good, you need to override the negatives and get yourself out there.i like this site because although void of life experiance the

majority are deep and thoughtfull people, but thats the trouble, **** you is my only answer, get out there, and be.live the life you deserve, stop with this deep, you only live once.the more you fight sa the more people will respect you.it sucks i know, but hell is where the shy live.

I'm interested in what you have to say...... A lot of people on the site (inc. myself) are deep-thinkers, and it would be good to hear another point of view.... Or maybe thats all there is: 'Just get on with it'..... Which is certainly a view to be taken into consideration....

mico · #47 18th December 2005, 12:36

I'm probably one of those culprits in the deep thinking department. But, I fully understand the argument, and it's true. It['s my thinking that gets me into so much trouble.

The books are useful, they can put you on the right approach, for many people there's a lot of confusion on which way to go. Gaining a little knowledge can help that side of things. But when it comes down to it, there comes a time when you've got to stop thinking about it and just get on with it, putting what you've read into practice, abandoning the multitude of thought avenues that you think may help you. You can't solve the problem in your mind. You can find the route, but then you've got to step outside and start walking down it.

mico

ivorthegalliant · #48 18th December 2005, 18:53

i am no expert, i get anxiety for different reasons, ie fear of death because its been in my life since the first gulf war.having said that anxiety is anxiety, i really feel for you lot, its deep seated and we are all individuals, but sa i believe is a form of being a prisoner of your own mind.i certainly would never judge you by looks or personnality or even your opinion.like i said, get angry do something that stops these people that you imagine in your mind from stopping you from doing what you want to do.learning about sa in books is ok, but you are the one ultimatly responsible for your life.its just in your heads and if you try hard enough you can break out.ive read of people thinking that the other person is thinking about what your thinking, that is deep, b ut you need to let go.anti anxiety pills help but are just a crutch, you are all special people and you deserve friends and a healthy life.a happy life.go on i dare you, be strong about being you, there are crap people out there, but the more we shy away the less good ones remain.look after each other, like you do on this board, but remember you can be one of the strong ones too,by leading by example.its your prisons, break out as dave grohl would say.good luck.

jontyboyoh · #49 18th December 2005, 20:56

Quote:

Originally Posted by ivorthegalliant

i am no expert, i get anxiety for different reasons, ie fear of death because its been in my life since the first gulf war.having said that anxiety is anxiety, i really feel for you lot, its deep seated and we are all individuals, but sa i believe is a form of being a prisoner of your own mind.i certainly would never judge you by looks or personnality or even your opinion.like i said, get angry do something that stops these people that you imagine in your mind from stopping you from doing what you want to do.learning about sa in books is ok, but you are the one ultimatly responsible for your life.its just in your heads and if you try hard enough you can break out.ive read of people thinking that the other person is thinking about what your thinking, that is deep, b ut you need to let go.anti anxiety pills help but are just a crutch, you are all special people and you deserve friends and a healthy life.a happy life.go on i dare you, be strong about being you, there are crap people out there, but the more we shy away the less good ones remain.look after each other, like you do on this board, but remember you can be one of the strong ones too,by leading by example.its your prisons, break out as dave grohl would say.good luck.

Very inspiring!

mico · #50 18th December 2005, 21:15

Yeah, it's good to see an injection of positivity on here Ivor.

mico

superj · #51 18th December 2005, 22:06

absolutely inspiring post. Its the kind of thing we need to be hearing more often on this.

Positive thinking the help we need to move forward.

Roberto · #52 18th December 2005, 22:19

"hell is where the shy live" :D

craig · #53 19th December 2005, 12:53

What a unnecessary

replyAsk for a simple bit of feedback about a book and you get that - **** you . I know where i am with sa and what i have to do but if i am curious still to hear claire weekes point of view then so be it. that has put me off using this site i acknowledge the points but i know that.
Thanks micro i think it was for the references

Phazed Out · #54 19th December 2005, 13:05

Craig, don't be put off, there is still of a lot of useful stuff you can gain from here. It really is no different to society at large, though there is a higher portion of people who will relate to your situation.
I found some books completely changed my perspective on how to challenge my avoidant behaviour/anxiety etc, in my experience the more educated you become the less daunting things can be.

craig · #55 19th December 2005, 14:24

cheers phazed out, your right

becoming more and more educated every day....Merry XMAS

Hoople · #56 19th December 2005, 16:00

Not wanting to p*ss on anyones parade but for those who buy more than one selfhelp book then i'd recommend reading this book:
"SHAM
Self Help Actualisation Movement
How the Gurus of the selfhelp movement make us helpless"
Steve Salerno

ivorthegalliant · #57 19th December 2005, 19:13

craig i meant you to say fcku u too the people in society that hold "you" back, i never meant any hostillity towards you, its just my way of dealing with life.else id never go out, as i explained i have ptsd which involves a total different type of anxiety.i love people, but mostly the people i can relate to, ie you lot and certain others that dont make my life anymore difficult as it is by their ignorance towards people like us.life is hard but even harder with anxiety.all im looking at is a bit more posotive mental attitude about what you all think about yourselves.even "normal" people dont like things about themselves, but dont have sa.

THE ANXIETY AND PHOBIA WORKBOOK
ISBN 1-57224-223-X
NEW HARBINGER PUBLICATIONS-INC
AUTHOR - BOURNE
I AM READING AT THE MINUTE.
TRY PLAY.COM
GO TO BOOKS AND SEARCH FOR IT.it may help.good luck ok.

thephoenix · #58 20th December 2005, 03:27

hello ivor im glad you had adopted this attidude but essentially what you are saying is just fcuking snap out of it. isnt this like saying to an anorexic " heres a bigmac meal just eat it you silly cow"

if this is working for you than thats great i wish it would work for me as i have tried many many times to throw myself into situations but always always feel ten times worse after it.

you appear to have no understanding of SA and your own anixety if i am correct is related to death. well guess what, every ones dies sooner or later, just get over it and live life to the full. dont even think about death ever again ok. the more you think about the more you give power to it.

Stepford · #59 20th December 2005, 08:38

Thanks ivorthegalliant you’re absolutely right! SA self help books in my opinion just say in a ton of words and psycho bullshit this, and I know many of us hate to hear it, to get out more.

Anyway basically you’ve wrote what I know to be the absolute truth of the matter. I’ve lately decided that this is what I need, real movement and have started doing more and making goals. Anyway good luck to all of you in 2006.

ivorthegalliant · #60 20th December 2005, 11:55

pheonix i take your advice in good faith, thanks.but i actually faught in the gulf war and i wont let you into what that was like.just to say i have been sectioned twice , once for walking down the m1, it was what they call a flashback.and ive done most of what the socalled experts have suggested, im currently on high medication, and i am dealing with life day to day.i have read lots of books, and although i now know about my condition they never helped.it is an individual thing if one thing works and another doesnt.i would never knock any of you, i think your fine people, i have been kicked down so many times, but what doesnt break you will make you.its true you will be more exposed out there because of sa, but i got this, im kind, giving and would help anyone out.these are my assets, i use them like a craft.it gets me by, some take advantage but hey why should i change.thanks to those who gave posotive replies, and craig try that book, its the best ive seen yet.ive had the pair of curtains treatment, ie pull yourself together, but it aint like that.all i tried to say was, there are some very nice people on this board who will not get better if they let people dictate their lives for them,you all deserve a healthy and happy life.just keep trying as much as you can, god loves a tryer.have a good xmas all of you.