#1
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Out of place
Hi. I've never been a really social person. I tend to keep to myself mostly. I recently got married a couple of months ago. I'm still shocked that I am married and that someone wants to be with me forever. I am not perfect. I know he doesn't expect me to be. I know he isn't perfect but to me he is perfect just the way he is. I love him with all my heart. But because of my anxiety depression worries and fears I tend to try to push him away because I don't feel like I deserve him or deserve love or happiness. I feel like it's going to end in heartbreak and I try to break up with him before things get to real and serious. Then I get jealous of my best friend getting married next year. I don't know why. She was my maid of honor but she has a sister and a future sister in law that is going to be her bride mates. I'm still upset that I have no roll in her wedding. I know I should be happy for her big day but I feel like we have been friends all our lives and I don't even know her anymore. I thought we were like sisters and know I feel like I'm not even apart of her life. Part of me wants to go to the wedding but part of me feels like I shouldn't go if I can't be happy for her. I feel like she doesn't need me anymore because she has him now to talk to. I don't even go hang out with my friends anymore because of my anxiety depression and physical health. I try to tell myself just breathe and take your medication that you will be fine but then I have an anxiety attack and chicken out that I can't do it.
I just want to feel normal like I belong with my friends and family but I feel out of place. I've been diagnosed with social anxiety general anxiety depression. I try to do deep breathing to relax but sometimes I'm so anxious I can't sit still. I get acid reflux and upset stomach when I get stressed out from unknown. I want to get my physical and mental health under control but where to start. You know? Sometimes I'm like who to talk to who can I trust with my personal problems. I just want a friend I can talk to who won't judge me but who will understand me to help me but someone to not burden with my problems. I question who I am and where am I going with my life. Is it going to be like this everyday. Or will it get better.thank you for listening to my crap. |
#2
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Re: Out of place
Welcome to the show.
You should ask your DR for Zoton 30mg, that should/could help with your acid reflux. |
#3
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Re: Out of place
Welcome to the forum
Congratulations on your recent marriage, surely the best person to talk to would be your husband ? |
#4
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Re: Out of place
Thank you. Yes I talk to my husband but I feel like I'm a burden to him with all my issues.
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#5
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Re: Out of place
Just need a friend
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#6
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Re: Out of place
Quote:
I won't hold it against you, if you refuse it. |