First day of university tomorrow

Tom1985 · #1 22nd September 2019, 21:52

Got university tomorrow. Started last year but dropped out part way through and am repeating the year.
Got a week of induction stuff that I'm timetabled in for.
Feel as if I don't really need to be there as I know the campus etc etc and it's irrelevant information I don't need not actual lectures and seminars.
However I'm gonna go because I don't want to miss information or if I need to sign anything or register etc.
I am really not looking forward to it as it surely will involve meeting all the new students and doing "ice breaker" exercises etc.
Didn't bother me last year because I was genuinely new but I really can't be bothered with it this time around.
Feel apprehensive and fed up. Not in a lighthearted fun mood to be meeting new people and making small talk etc.
It's bad enough that I stick out cause I'm in my thirties and not 18 just finished school. Could just skip the week and turn up next week when lectures start but I just get the feeling I will have missed something I was supposed to do this week. Really not looking forward to it. Dreading it now, will be dreading it all morning and will probably feel crap while I'm there.

Marco · #2 22nd September 2019, 22:11

Good luck Tom! I can totally relate to your dread, but I have found over the years (I'm a lot older than you) that things are never as bad as you imagine they'll be. Don't skip this week - you'll be fine! All the best!!!

Tom1985 · #3 22nd September 2019, 22:18

Quote:

Originally Posted by biscuits

Hope it's more bearable than your mind is allowing you to imagine and that you meet someone nice/fun/interesting on your course

What are you studying?

I'm studying English literature. As I don't live on campus and i'm a mature student I'm not there to make friends and socialise with the young ones.
I just go to lectures and seminars. I'm not rude to people and will chat with people if the situation arises but I don't go out of my way to speak to other students. Mostly females on my course last year. I'm guessing it will be the same this year. I just do my own thing there like any mature student would in that environment.

limey123 · #4 22nd September 2019, 22:19

They'll probably be even more nervous than you, with you having done it before and being in your 30s. Perhaps you're over-thinking it.

Things will be fine, I'm sure

Tom1985 · #5 22nd September 2019, 22:23

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marco

Good luck Tom! I can totally relate to your dread, but I have found over the years (I'm a lot older than you) that things are never as bad as you imagine they'll be. Don't skip this week - you'll be fine! All the best!!!

Thank you. I know it will be fine and things are never as bad as you envisage them. I really just don't feel like it at the moment though. It was different last year as I was genuinely there for the first time like everybody else.
I'll see how the first session goes. If I feel like it's all just a waste of time i'll just leave. It's up to me obviously if I tell others that I'm repeating the year.
Although, i'll be sure to see teachers again that i had before.
I'm just gonna be honest if it comes up. Doesn't bother me tbh.

limey123 · #6 22nd September 2019, 22:25

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tom1985

I'm studying English literature. As I don't live on campus and i'm a mature student I'm not there to make friends and socialise with the young ones.
I just go to lectures and seminars. I'm not rude to people and will chat with people if the situation arises but I don't go out of my way to speak to other students. Mostly females on my course last year. I'm guessing it will be the same this year. I just do my own thing there like any mature student would in that environment.

I did English for my BA. Found it a great thing study, even if my social life for most of the 3 years was virtually zero. On my course there were 10 girls to 1 guy - not that I got anywhere with the girls at that time, lol!

Maybe you should go into the common room or whatever you have, sometimes, and talk to the other students. When I did my MA I didn't live in London, just commuted there a few times a week. Like you, I just went in for seminars. There was a department common room where the students hung out but I lacked the confidence and almost never went in there. The other students must have decided I was a snob or somehow stuck-up, and this rumour circulated around the department and eventually bit me on the arse. Don't make the mistake I did - do some socialising!

Tom1985 · #7 22nd September 2019, 22:28

Quote:

Originally Posted by limey123

They'll probably be even more nervous than you, with you having done it before and being in your 30s. Perhaps you're over-thinking it.

Things will be fine, I'm sure

Yeah, it's whether I say from the start I'm repeating the year or just keep quiet and act like i'm here for the first time.
I wish it wasn't timetabled in for me to do induction week. Could easily just turn up next week when it starts properly but I'll just worry that I missed some information I needed to know about something or other.

Jen. · #8 22nd September 2019, 22:28

Hope it goes well this time! I always thought university is wasted on the "young". People seem to get more out of it and put more effort in when they don't go straight from school (or a year later).

Utopia · #9 22nd September 2019, 22:36

Yeah, some courses seem to have a lot more males than females, and have different personalities etc. Something like mental health nursing has more females than males but physics or computer science has like 10 males to 1 female for whatever reason. There is always at least one guy that is clearly older than the rest though. I was lucky as I looked like a teenager up until about the age of 28, giving me more time, not that it matters in the age of Facebook anyway.

Tom1985 · #10 22nd September 2019, 22:38

Quote:

Originally Posted by limey123

I did English for my BA. Found it a great thing study, even if my social life for most of the 3 years was virtually zero. On my course there were 10 girls to 1 guy - not that I got anywhere with the girls at that time, lol!

Maybe you should go into the common room or whatever you have, sometimes, and talk to the other students. When I did my MA I didn't live in London, just commuted there a few times a week. Like you, I just went in for seminars. There was a department common room where the students hung out but I lacked the confidence and almost never went in there. The other students must have decided I was a snob or somehow stuck-up, and this rumour circulated around the department and eventually bit me on the arse. Don't make the mistake I did - do some socialising!

Oh did you do English yourself!? Last year I honestly didn't care about socialising because I was really not gonna tag around with a group of 18 year old girls. It would be weird for me and them. It didn't bother me and I expected it to be like that. Just did my own thing. To be honest I was really just gonna
do the same thing this time around but could get involved more in sports or activities or whatever. I'll see how I feel about it when given the opportunity.
I didn't feel lonely or isolated I just went about my business.

limey123 · #11 22nd September 2019, 22:46

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tom1985

but could get involved more in sports or activities or whatever.

Sounds like a plan

Tom1985 · #12 22nd September 2019, 22:48

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jen.

Hope it goes well this time! I always thought university is wasted on the "young". People seem to get more out of it and put more effort in when they don't go straight from school (or a year later).

lol funny! Not gonna rock up on a skateboard lol

Thanks Jen

Dougella · #13 22nd September 2019, 22:58

Good luck! Maybe there might be the odd other mature student on your course, it's not so unusual for people to go to uni later these days.

Marie8 · #14 23rd September 2019, 00:17

Good luck for your first day

Coffee · #15 23rd September 2019, 10:09

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tom1985

I'm studying English literature. As I don't live on campus and i'm a mature student I'm not there to make friends and socialise with the young ones.
I just go to lectures and seminars. I'm not rude to people and will chat with people if the situation arises but I don't go out of my way to speak to other students. Mostly females on my course last year. I'm guessing it will be the same this year. I just do my own thing there like any mature student would in that environment.

So I'm sat here in the office trying to distract myself from the week's stack of paperwork ahead...and you're telling me you're about to spend 3 years stuck in a room with a bunch of intelligent young women?