What does CBT involve? - Page 5

Mina · #**121** 27th August 2012, 02:11

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rocket Spud

^ They may do. Maybe. They won't push you though. As long as you state your preferences, you'll be fine... (I'm bloody useless

)

Other people?? It's all confidential. Only people that need to know... know. I'm sure you have a greater say in that, even if you want to.

I know it's silly for me to say that. I work in healthcare myself so I know it's all confidential, but because I always think that I am exceptionally stupid compared to other people, I imagine anything I could write to try and explain my feelings would be laugh out loud funny to a therapist or just sound pitiful like I don't have any real problems and I'm being a "drama queen"

It could be a mixture of 2 things really. In addition to the writing phobia I have never really talked about my feelings before. I grew up in a family where everyone just argued and shouted about stuff that got them down, nobody from my family says "I love you". Obviously, my SA has prevented me from having anyone I could really confide in so I've never shared my feelings with a friend. I do have a boyfriend and he is usually great with understanding the emotional turmoil of living with me (he thinks all girls are crazy anyway) but whenever I try to talk about the stuff that's at the heart of my anxiety and start crying, he starts being really silly and trying to make me laugh to change the subject. I suppose this site is the first time I have ever really shared my true anxieties with anyone.

P.S. Thanks Celine, I didn't see your post before. I think you are right, if I'm going to conquer my SA I might as well aim to get over my writing fear. It is an integral part of my SA and I might as well get help for it from a therapist instead of more avoidance

Celine · #**122** 5th October 2012, 00:28

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mina

P.S. Thanks Celine, I didn't see your post before. I think you are right, if I'm going to conquer my SA I might as well aim to get over my writing fear. It is an integral part of my SA and I might as well get help for it from a therapist instead of more avoidance

Hi Mina,
I hope you are doing well

I like your attitude and even if you just start by countering your thoughts on paper in the TEA form CBT exercise I think that will build your confidence as well as help you overcome your writing fears. It's a real basic exercise and has helped me immensely.

herb · #**123** 29th October 2012, 21:29

Quote:

Originally Posted by Celine

Hi Mina,

Writing and countering your thoughts is a very integral part of CBT. However on the bright side the focus is on changing how you process what happens in your life and not critical at all about how well you write and will not be shared with anyone other than your therapist. Based on my experience I think facing this fear about writing will be very beneficial to you with the help of a good CBT practitioner. You will likely discover than this fear, like many others is irrational and not nearly as troubling as it seems to you in your head.

I hope this is helpful and that CBT will prove to help you feel a lot better

Well done. Great insights Celine!

Celine · #**124** 26th November 2012, 23:29

Quote:

Originally Posted by herb

Well done. Great insights Celine!

Thanks. I hope you Mina and everyone else are doing well. You are all in my thoughts

helzy · #**125** 14th December 2012, 02:12

For me, CBT involved a nurse telling me everything I already knew, having done a psychology A level. It was rather patronising! I had CBT with this nurse, and told him more than he'd studied, so he could do nothing more with me. It was a complete disappointment, especially when all you need is direction.

Mina · #**126** 28th December 2012, 02:26

Sorry I have returned to this after quite a delay lol

What is a TEA form?

Progress · #**127** 28th December 2012, 11:51

^ That sounds great. Glad you've found a good therapist

cogent · #**128** 28th December 2012, 12:05

^
Good stuff, glad it went well this morning.

clawhammer. · #**129** 28th December 2012, 16:45

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mina

Sorry I have returned to this after quite a delay lol

What is a TEA form?

TEA forms are very similar to the 'thought records' you practise in CBT.

Quote:

Originally Posted by V-2 Schneider

For once somebody asked me about my childhood and relationship with my parents,homelife,school and she didn't just steer me away from it and say "well we just need to work on the now" as others have.

If you're having CBT then, other than first getting to know you, I doubt the therapist will focus much on your past.

I may be referred to mid-Essex IAPT in the near future, so I'm interested to see how you get on - I might even end up with the same therapist.

pavlovsdog · #**130** 1st January 2013, 14:27

Hi all, I haven't read through all the posts relating to this question so apologies if I am repeating info.

CBT is available on the NHS nationally so no-one should have to consider going private. There are IAPT services available in most localities and you can generally refer yourself, or if not, your GP can refer you. Services are delivered in a stepped care apprach, depending upon the severity of your condition. The is also 'guided' CBT which is an online programme with weekly telephone contact from a CBT practitioner. Whichever way it is delivered, CBT is a collaborative approach where you are expected to actively participate and challege thoughts and behaviours, so it can be a demanding process

There are some excellent self help books, particularly the 'Overcoming..' series which are quite cheap to buy. The one on SA is by Gillian Butler and uses a CBT approach.
I
Lastly, though CBT is currently the recommended treatment for anxiety/depression and many other disorders, it doesn't suit everyone, so its worth shopping round to see what else your local NHS offers. If your not sure where to find out have a look at your local NHS website for mental health services, or ask your GP what is available.

Hope this helps and sorry again if I have repeated stuff, but I've seen a lot of posts like this.

Good luck whatever you do!

Celine · #**131** 9th February 2013, 03:08

Quote:

Originally Posted by helzy

For me, CBT involved a nurse telling me everything I already knew, having done a psychology A level. It was rather patronising! I had CBT with this nurse, and told him more than he'd studied, so he could do nothing more with me. It was a complete disappointment, especially when all you need is direction.

There are lots of good and bad CBT practitioners... Sounds like you found a horrible one

Celine · #**132** 9th February 2013, 03:10

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mina

Sorry I have returned to this after quite a delay lol

What is a TEA form?

The CBT thought countering exercise in the book by Sam Obitz and Michelle Craske (www.tao3.com)

Celine · #**133** 9th February 2013, 03:13

Quote:

Originally Posted by clawhammer.

If you're having CBT then, other than first getting to know you, I doubt the therapist will focus much on your past.

I always cringe when people say they are in CBT and go on to mention talking about their past.... That's not real CBT. CBT is all about moving forward and cares little about how you got where you are today. CBT teaches you how to deal in the present and worked really well for me.

herb · #**134** 11th February 2013, 01:14

Well said Celine. Far too many therapists claim to be doing CBT but are not. CBT is not traditional talk therapy and does not involve talking about your past. It's all about learning to use tools like the TEA form etc to train your brain to react more objectively!

mayo1 · #**135** 25th May 2013, 00:37

Quote:
Originally Posted by herb
Ditto and well said. The TEA forms from Sam Obitz's cbt book have worked wonders for me, or shall I say I have used them to work wonders for me

Quote:

Originally Posted by Celine

I like the way you said it here in a proactive rather than passive way. You deserve all the credit for your successes!

I agree, the TEA forms work great if you spend time doing them. Been a life changer for me

I can't believe it has been over a year since my last post? Time flies a lot faster when you feel great

iTz0kt0Bu · #**136** 25th May 2013, 00:51

Quote:

Originally Posted by herb

Well said Celine. Far too many therapists claim to be doing CBT but are not. CBT is not traditional talk therapy and does not involve talking about your past. It's all about learning to use tools like the TEA form etc to train your brain to react more objectively!

I've never done CBT but wouldn't looking into your past help you to find and have deeper understanding of your triggers. Everyones SA trigger is unique, although being taught how to deal with social situations seems beneficial having deeper understanding of your triggers seems more beneficial and seems like a logical way to find the best ways to think in social situations.

iTz0kt0Bu · #**137** 25th May 2013, 00:53

Quote:

Originally Posted by Celine

I always cringe when people say they are in CBT and go on to mention talking about their past.... That's not real CBT. CBT is all about moving forward and cares little about how you got where you are today. CBT teaches you how to deal in the present and worked really well for me.

How you got here today explains partly how you developed SA.

herb · #**138** 31st May 2013, 19:23

Quote:

Originally Posted by retep

I've never done CBT but wouldn't looking into your past help you to find and have deeper understanding of your triggers. Everyones SA trigger is unique, although being taught how to deal with social situations seems beneficial having deeper understanding of your triggers seems more beneficial and seems like a logical way to find the best ways to think in social situations.

I spent many years working on my past with few lasting results. Once I got into CBT and dedicated myself to using the TEA forms daily I started seeing big changes for the better in a few months. I learned it was not important what triggered my anxiety but rather how I reacted to what triggered it. As Obitz says you can't change your past but you can change your future.

herb · #**139** 31st May 2013, 19:26

Quote:

Originally Posted by retep

How you got here today explains partly how you developed SA.

Are you more worried about discovering the cause/explanation or feeling better?
When a soccer player gets injured he's not wasting time going over how it happened (it really makes no difference), he's spending his time on getting better so he can get back in the game.

Belinda · #**140** 31st May 2013, 20:24

I'm doing CBT at the moment too. My therapist is quite keen on finding out about my past and thinks my relationship with my Mum has had quite a bearing on my difficulties.

I seem to be a bit CBT-resistant but I really like my therapist so I've been trying my best with it. I think my problem is that I seem to do a lot of the techniques they teach you already so it hasn't taught me anything new as yet and I'm now getting near the end of the course.

iTz0kt0Bu · #**141** 31st May 2013, 22:19

Quote:

Originally Posted by herb

I spent many years working on my past with few lasting results. Once I got into CBT and dedicated myself to using the TEA forms daily I started seeing big changes for the better in a few months. I learned it was not important what triggered my anxiety but rather how I reacted to what triggered it. As Obitz says you can't change your past but you can change your future.

Yeah that makes a lot of sense. But wouldn't looking into the past also help you have more understanding of how and why you react to triggers.

iTz0kt0Bu · #**142** 31st May 2013, 22:26

Quote:

Originally Posted by herb

Are you more worried about discovering the cause/explanation or feeling better?
When a soccer player gets injured he's not wasting time going over how it happened (it really makes no difference), he's spending his time on getting better so he can get back in the game.

But soccer is much different to SA. I haven't overcame SA yet but have realised the reason its hard to overcome is cause it involves changing your brains habits which have been formed over the years. It involves lots of mental and physical work to overcome, rather than mostly physical like soccer.

herb · #**143** 5th June 2013, 20:11

Quote:

Originally Posted by retep

Yeah that makes a lot of sense. But wouldn't looking into the past also help you have more understanding of how and why you react to triggers.

Hi Retep,
I'm not an expert by any means, just sharing my experience. I am just saying that you can get caught up looking into the past and trying to understand and miss doing the stuff that makes a difference. That was my experience anyway.

herb · #**144** 5th June 2013, 20:17

Quote:

Originally Posted by retep

But soccer is much different to SA. I haven't overcame SA yet but have realised the reason its hard to overcome is cause it involves changing your brains habits which have been formed over the years. It involves lots of mental and physical work to overcome, rather than mostly physical like soccer.

Fair point and maybe not the best example using soccer, but I think you got my point? Let me try a different example, if you are nearsighted finding out why you are nearsighted is of no use in helping you see more clearly. Regardless of the cause you will need corrective lenses. My point being I tried understanding and made little progress, but as soon as I learned to deal with my problems as they were happening I created new habits and that is what has helped me feel so much better. It is hard work changing your brain but worth it over time for me.

herb · #**145** 5th June 2013, 20:21

Quote:

Originally Posted by Belinda

I'm doing CBT at the moment too. My therapist is quite keen on finding out about my past and thinks my relationship with my Mum has had quite a bearing on my difficulties.

I seem to be a bit CBT-resistant but I really like my therapist so I've been trying my best with it. I think my problem is that I seem to do a lot of the techniques they teach you already so it hasn't taught me anything new as yet and I'm now getting near the end of the course.

Hi Belinda,
My experience with CBT was great (and very different from yours) we were told that how you got where you are is of little use, but dealing and moving forward is the key to feeling better. It worked for me, and I hope you find something that works for you

Belinda · #**146** 5th June 2013, 20:30

Thanks Herb- I had CBT today in fact. It's very much a mixture of the helpful and the not so helpful for me but my therapist seems to think I'm doing well with it so I shall persevere!

mayo1 · #**147** 8th June 2013, 21:48

Quote:

Originally Posted by herb

Fair point and maybe not the best example using soccer, but I think you got my point? Let me try a different example, if you are nearsighted finding out why you are nearsighted is of no use in helping you see more clearly. Regardless of the cause you will need corrective lenses. My point being I tried understanding and made little progress, but as soon as I learned to deal with my problems as they were happening I created new habits and that is what has helped me feel so much better. It is hard work changing your brain but worth it over time for me.

Great convo herb and retep

I like the nearsighted example a lot better than the soccer one, but I did understand your point in the soccer one. I would say my experience would be somewhat similar herb. I admit I still wonder how my problems started but not as often now that I am feeling so much better

herb · #**148** 1st July 2013, 22:09

Quote:

Originally Posted by Belinda

Thanks Herb- I had CBT today in fact. It's very much a mixture of the helpful and the not so helpful for me but my therapist seems to think I'm doing well with it so I shall persevere!

Thanks for the reply Belinda

I sincerely hope you experience similar results to what I have achieved using CBT

herb · #**149** 1st July 2013, 22:12

Quote:

Originally Posted by mayo1

Great convo herb and retep

I like the nearsighted example a lot better than the soccer one, but I did understand your point in the soccer one. I would say my experience would be somewhat similar herb. I admit I still wonder how my problems started but not as often now that I am feeling so much better

Thanks for chiming in Mayo1! Glad my second example was more illustrative and good to hear you are feeling well. I was totally focused on what caused me to have anxiety and depression for years but once I discovered CBT/TEA forms and they started to help me I decided to focus forward from now on

Celine · #**150** 2nd August 2013, 20:39

Quote:

Originally Posted by herb

Well said Celine. Far too many therapists claim to be doing CBT but are not. CBT is not traditional talk therapy and does not involve talking about your past. It's all about learning to use tools like the TEA form etc to train your brain to react more objectively!

Thanks and well put Herb!