Hello Again

[AutumnLeaves]

Hello everyone. I disappeared from the forum for a while. The last time I was active on here, I was doing my Masters on social anxiety from a sociological perspective. I wanted to show how difficult it can be for people with social anxiety when in the workplace, or trying to get a job. Unfortunately, my own social anxiety got the better of me, and I ended up handing in a rough first draft of my paper. So bye-bye went my chance of a scholarship and taking the research any further. I felt so bad that I had let my participants down, especially as I know how much of an effort it takes to do something like that when you have social anxiety. I am on my fourth job since finishing my masters, and I left each one because I was messing up, forgetting things and not coping because of my anxiety. My current workplace is the best place I have ever worked, and my colleagues could not be kinder. But I feel like a fraud, and I don't really know what I'm doing, and I keep doing or saying embarrassing things and getting myself into sticky situations. I would have stayed a cleaner all my life if I hadn't developed such a sore back. Anyway, that was a bit of a rant. But, as has been the case in the past when I left the forum for a while, I have missed the people I used to talk to, and I am just saying hello again to the people who already know me, and to new members. This is a great forum, and attracts lots of interesting people, who come to seek advice and to support each other.

[Mr. Nobody]

good to hear from you again AL,
sounds like you've had a tough time with those jobs,
but I get a sense that you're not giving yourself a break and have a very high expectation of yourself, and rigorous self-standards
in the workplace, I see all sorts of people just muddling by with very little finesse or attention to detail, but still they seem to get by, just doing the basics required,
maybe try and relax in the work and not leave just because you feel you're standards have slipped a little,
most people wouldn't notice, and I'm sure your work was fine.

hope you get on okay in your current job, that sounds like a cool bunch of people.

[AutumnLeaves]

Originally Posted by Vasco Da Gama

good to hear from you again AL,
sounds like you've had a tough time with those jobs,
but I get a sense that you're not giving yourself a break and have a very high expectation of yourself, and rigorous self-standards
in the workplace, I see all sorts of people just muddling by with very little finesse or attention to detail, but still they seem to get by, just doing the basics required,
maybe try and relax in the work and not leave just because you feel you're standards have slipped a little,
most people wouldn't notice, and I'm sure your work was fine.

hope you get on okay in your current job, that sounds like a cool bunch of people.

Thank you Vasco, good to hear from you too

Yes that's true. I see people getting by like that too, though I find it hard not to see myself as special and making an especially bad job of things! I have been watching the sitcom, Friends again on Netflix. Sometimes I think it would be wonderful to be like Joey - so blissfully unreflective, unaware of his ignorance and flaws, and happy as long as he has his comfy recliner, TV and pizza (OK, the hot girls on tap probably helps to block it out too).

I hope you are doing OK yourself ***9786;***65039;

[AutumnLeaves]

Originally Posted by GlasgowFilmTheatreFan

Hi AL good to see you again. As one of the Skype participants (old name AuroraSky) I don't have any thoughts of being let down, I recall it as a pleasant and wideranging conversation. Although you would have no doubt liked to research further, as my sister said to me once in another context "education is never wasted" for your own personal development outside of career gains.

I have also has the discouraging experience of walking out on several jobs in my 20's and 30's, they say never walk out on a job without another lined up but on several occasions it was either quit or crack up and sometimes health had to come first. I think jobs can be a bit more precarious nowadays with big established companies letting people go, so I don't think you would be seen as a "job-hopper". If you are in a good working environment now though I hope you find the mix of organising and stress management skills to keep it sustainable for you.

So hello again * waves *, you've definitely not been forgotten here, and I hope you continue to find this site a source of support and friendship this time round.

Good to hear from you again too GFT fan

I am glad you do not think that I let you down. And that is wise words from your sister. It is something I have to remind myself of regularly, as a sociology graduate . And I do tell people whenever I can the kinds of things I found out from my research - which I guess could be considered to be awareness-raising at a grass roots level.

Thank you for your good wishes. I remember you telling me about a couple of courses/interests you were hoping to pursue. Perhaps you could tell me how that went some time by PM, or if we have another Scottish meet