What is the worst thing someone has ever said to you? - Page 4

Defiance · #91 3rd December 2010, 00:55

Quote:

Originally Posted by AxelFendersson

If being jokingly turned down causes her to wish you dead and accuse you of being a potential rapist, I think you probably dodged a bullet not getting too involved. Certainly you didn't lose much.

she was wrong to say those things and i don't condone it, but i can tell she only said them because she thought she had been snubbed,

and speaking from personal experience if you put yourself out there and you end up getting actually snubbed (not just rejected) it can invoke a strong mix of negative emotions within ones self, and the quickest way to relieve that is to have a pop at the person who made you feel that way..

or failing that, saying something bad about them to someone else...

neither of those things is the right thing to do, but it will make the person feel better

Medea · #92 3rd December 2010, 00:56

I remember there was naming calling at school and at home. There was never any escape from feeling shit about myself. It haunts me and I have spent a lot of time in therapy attempting to see I'm a good person, but it doesn't last long.

Caribou · #93 3rd December 2010, 01:01

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cynic

I take it he ceased to be your best mate after that?

We still speak but the friendship has largely fizzled out.

Mortigantoj · #94 3rd December 2010, 01:15

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dragnet

But really it's your choice, not hers.

I can go ... with the flow!

Defiance · #95 3rd December 2010, 01:25

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mortigantoj

I can go ... with the flow!

if you feel strongly about her it might be hard to just keep seeing her as a friend. that constant reminder, day in, day out..

i honestly don't know if i could do it. i know for a fact i would feel like poo if i saw another guy come onto her and her reciprocating..

Mortigantoj · #96 3rd December 2010, 01:34

Don't think I've ever used this phrase before, but ... meh!

Phool · #97 3rd December 2010, 02:35

^ Mort - this gonna sound completely counterintuitive but its easier to stay friends if you've had a relationship. I've remained friends witha couple of exes for a number of years after we broke up. The most painful feeling is unrequited love...I've never handled that well and neither have guys who have been 'in love' with me but who I didn't feel the same way about. It never really works as you will always hold a secret hope that they will change their mind.

Again sounds counterintuitive but it could be that if you hold back a bit...she may realise what she's missing?

Sphinx · #98 3rd December 2010, 10:51

I've been called all kinds of things in school such as:

an ugly dog,

ugh you're so thin are you anorexic

moose

that i looked like a boy so i must be a lesbian, (wtf so stupid, and doesn't even make sense)

stuck up bitch etc etc

Looking back now it seems pretty ridiculous to me. I think the most hurtful thing someone could comment on now would be my quietness as I hate people pointing it out.

Mortigantoj · #99 3rd December 2010, 11:42

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phool

it could be that if you hold back a bit...she may realise what she's missing?

She's not missing much, to be honest

Ember · #**100** 3rd December 2010, 12:12

Not so much to me, but after I split with my ex and he got himself a new gf his brother said " Nice to meet (new gf name here) she is much better than (my name), she actually talks!"

That kinda hurt.

Then the usual, people asking if I am scared of them, saying I'm stuck up, blah blah blah. Someone said I had ruined their life because I didn't have feelings for them, that I'm a lesbian.

disarm1234 · #**101** 3rd December 2010, 19:06

The worst thing ever said to me was "I don't love you anymore" off my ex of 4 years. It really destroyed me because I loved her so much and still do a little even after a year has nearly passed.

Mortigantoj · #**102** 3rd December 2010, 19:10

^ I could have written that post myself, almost word-for-word!

indiegirl1980 · #**103** 3rd December 2010, 19:11

'Why can you never get anything right?'- my Mum years ago, when all I'd done was turn the grill nob up on the oven instead of the oven nob and she thought I'd burnt the lasagne. (The stupid thing about this story is the pigging lasagne wasn't even burnt)

'If you're like this with other people, no wonder they don't want to have anything to do with you' my Mum again when I was unhappy at uni

'Quite frankly, you come across as arrogant'- a manager at my voluntary placement.

'You're so ugly' every day at school from the age of at least 11.

'You're so strange'- see above.

'It's better than dressing like a f*ckin lesbian librarian like she does' said by someone at work to my manager when she mentioned something about her dress being too short (I had noticed that you could see right up her skirt when she bent over).

Just thought of some more to do with work:

Not actually said to me but overheard whilst on a temping job at a company with a lot of phone work. The supervisor was on the phone to the agency and said:

'We need another temp for the next few weeks, someone more outgoing. Quiet mouse, won't work' (I was out of the room at the time as I had gone to the toilet so she thought she was safe).

'The thing is (my name) you get stroppy at us and tell us what to do, but you don't back it up with work': boy during a group project at uni. I was the one actually getting us to settle on one idea, because as soon as I had done some work, they all decided that they didn't want it again.

kastra · #**104** 3rd December 2010, 19:16

oh yay I've been reminded of another one - 'you're so quiet that if I hadn't seen your A level results I would just assume you're stupid'. Also made me cry but can't remember if I managed to hold off until I was out of the room or not.
It was from my first year tutor at uni, she was the only female member of the teaching staff in the department but after that I didn't exactly seek out conversation with her

littlejack · #**105** 3rd December 2010, 20:03

Some people are just fecking horrible.

wjfox · #**106** 3rd December 2010, 23:10

"You're a spectacled, alien poof!" - a guy shouted this at me, during an art class, while the teacher was out. I didn't do anything to provoke him whatsoever, he just blurted it out.

"He looks like a transvestite!" - in my 2nd year of college, a girl said this to her friends as I approached a bar, thinking I couldn't hear her.

"You're as skinny as a rake!" - my own mother screamed this at me. I've since returned to a normal weight. But at the time, it made me really self-conscious of my appearance.

Rubik · #**107** 4th December 2010, 00:10

Somebody told me that I was antisocial once.

I dont know, most of what anyone told me throughout school was insulting, and nobody else did anything or say anything, including the teachers, i couldnt obviously stand up for myself. I see these people from school sometimes, most of the time they ignore me or patronise me, i have no idea what i did to make them detest me so much

FastLad · #**108** 4th December 2010, 00:23

We were talking about potential jobs in my class and one guy asked me how I hoped to survive in a steady job since I was so weird and awkward and the others agreed. Not that bad but I thought I was making improvements, guess not lol

Sadpup · #**109** 4th December 2010, 00:25

Quote:

Originally Posted by diplodocus

'Oh **** off you chinky git!' That was my best friend at school at the time! That cut real deep and I was too stunned to even react. Needless to say that was the end of that friendship lol

(o.0) Friend my arse

Bananas · #**110** 4th December 2010, 01:19

I only got to page 3 of this thread. What bothers me most is I dont understand how people can behave in the manner they do, Im sure in some scenarios they might not know they do it but in others its just horrible. Are these people human? ....Im a human and I dont feel any urge to have the malice to put people down or ridicule them, is this something wrong with them, or with me, as I seriously do not understand the reasoning behind such behavior.... its not emotional, its not stimulating, its not logical, its not necessary, its not nice, its not beneficial, its not rewarding, it serves no purpose...so why?

Scott03 · #**111** 4th December 2010, 13:55

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rebeccax30

What was said about me was horrible (not going there), but what got to me was the fact that it was my dad that said it.

Some of the most horrible things that have been said to me have been said by my Dad.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bananas

I only got to page 3 of this thread. What bothers me most is I dont understand how people can behave in the manner they do, Im sure in some scenarios they might not know they do it but in others its just horrible. Are these people human? ....Im a human and I dont feel any urge to have the malice to put people down or ridicule them, is this something wrong with them, or with me, as I seriously do not understand the reasoning behind such behavior.... its not emotional, its not stimulating, its not logical, its not necessary, its not nice, its not beneficial, its not rewarding, it serves no purpose...so why?

In my opinion, people say hurtful things in some cases because they are feeling insecure in some way and need to put someone down in order to feel good about themselves, especially if they do it in front of an audience. They are not necessarily 'bad' people, but a weakness they have causes them to succumb to this kind of behaviour. Indeed, on the flip side, despite our Social Anxiety, I am sure some of us here have said stuff to people in the past that we regret. I know I definitely have.

I also think that some people do it because they do genuinely worry about the person that they are saying it to, and they have a misguided view that giving someone a 'kick up the backside' will help them in some way. It doesn't, of course, and usually just exacerbates the situation by creating hurt feelings. Unfortunately, when someone does this it is probably because that is how they have been dealt with previously.

This is just my opinion though, and I could be wrong.

Illogical Lady · #**112** 5th December 2010, 22:36

A guy that was behind me pinched my bum. When I turned round, he said to his mate

"Nice arse - shame about the face"

and they both laughed at me. At the time i didn't have a problem with the way i look but it got me thinking about what other people have said about me which at the time i took no notice of. Now i have real trouble with the way i look. I would trade anything to have a nice face. It's the one thing i can't change.

Wheelie Bin Bird · #**113** 5th December 2010, 22:42

Will you marry me??

Detox · #**114** 5th December 2010, 22:51

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rufus

The only conclusion is that a good part of humanity are vile scum.

Sums everything up in a nut shell really.

AxelFendersson · #**115** 6th December 2010, 00:12

Quote:

Originally Posted by Illogical Lady

A guy that was behind me pinched my bum. When I turned round, he said to his mate

"Nice arse - shame about the face"

and they both laughed at me.

That's really quite shocking. It's so totally out of order on so many levels. I'm baffled as to how anyone could think that was acceptable behaviour in any context.

Astonishing.

Illogical Lady · #**116** 6th December 2010, 00:20

Quote:

Originally Posted by AxelFendersson

That's really quite shocking. It's so totally out of order on so many levels. I'm baffled as to how anyone could think that was acceptable behaviour in any context.

Astonishing.

Maybe because there are some superficial people that don't give a s**t about the person they are saying stuff about. Unfortunately the comment had weight because it was a completely unbiased view.

bunkoff · #**117** 6th December 2010, 02:28

"Why do you have to be so boring?"

Don't know why this has particularly played on my mind. I guess I'd have rather they pointed it out in a straightforward manner like everyone else so I could just brush it off as a consequence of them being rude than put it into a stupid question which leaves me bemused and upon consideration annoyed that I can't actually answer it.

nessa456 · #**118** 6th December 2010, 07:34

Quote:

Originally Posted by bobblehat

"Why do you have to be so boring?"

Don't know why this has particularly played on my mind. I guess I'd have rather they pointed it out in a straightforward manner like everyone else so I could just brush it off as a consequence of them being rude than put it into a stupid question which leaves me bemused and upon consideration annoyed that I can't actually answer it.

An ex partner of mine once said 'You're so dull!' which while by no means the worst thing anyone has ever said to me, still stung. I have the perfect 'excuse' of having Asperger's Syndrome, which means I'm not ever likely to be socially adept but to have it bought home to me so bluntly wasn't nice.

On holiday as a child with my parents and younger brother (Daniel), me and my Dad were observing another child playing with a puppy and my Dad said 'That's what Daniel needs, a puppy; you're no good to him!'

Whenever I've bought this up as an adult to my Dad he always says, "I don't remember saying that" in a bemused, completely unapologetic way as if it's of no consequence at all how it might have affected me. Not surprisingly, while I have practically non-existant self esteem, my brother has thrived on all the parental adoration and has a teflon-coated sense of himself being rather fantastic.

And the ultimate irony is that it was my brother who put my father (who now has dementia) into a care home while me and my partner wanted to continue caring for him in his own home.

You couldn't make it up. It's like something out of a Dickens novel!

blubs · #**119** 9th December 2010, 21:19

The most horrible things said to me were by staff in hospital after having my babies, particularly the first.
Or rather about me not to me..I was in a room opposite the nurses station & at night could hear the night staff talking about me almost constantly.
Some that stuck in my head were..what's wrong with her face?
Good job she's not on a cancer ward she'd depress everbody
She's disgusting
People like that shouldn't have children.
One morning one of the staff came in chatting to be really friendly about her own children & told me all about her daughter having big ugly feet..I said 'oh, poor thing, I've got big feet & I hate them' (which I have) only to hear her repeat the whole conversation 5 minutes later followed by peals of laughter & of course she was making it up, just pointing out I had ugly feet in a sly & horrible way.
They were so bad a senior staff member repremanded them one night & I heard her saying something about my mental health history. When she'd gone they fell about laughing sayin 'oooh, I'm shy!' to each other.

What Absolute Bitches.
I was suicidal by the time I left hospital, aswell as having severe anaemia, that I refused a transfusion for as I wouldn't stay there any longer, and a womb infection.

Thankfully, it turns out people like me should definately have children because mine are gorgeous & love me to bits.

wjfox · #**120** 9th December 2010, 21:25

Quote:

Originally Posted by blubs

The most horrible things said to me were by staff in hospital after having my babies, particularly the first.
Or rather about me not to me..I was in a room opposite the nurses station & at night could hear the night staff talking about me almost constantly.
Some that stuck in my head were..what's wrong with her face?
Good job she's not on a cancer ward she'd depress everbody
She's disgusting
People like that shouldn't have children.
One morning one of the staff came in chatting to be really friendly about her own children & told me all about her daughter having big ugly feet..I said 'oh, poor thing, I've got big feet & I hate them' (which I have) only to hear her repeat the whole conversation 5 minutes later followed by peals of laughter & of course she was making it up, just pointing out I had ugly feet in a sly & horrible way.
They were so bad a senior staff member repremanded them one night & I heard her saying something about my mental health history. When she'd gone they fell about laughing sayin 'oooh, I'm shy!' to each other.

What Absolute Bitches.
I was suicidal by the time I left hospital, aswell as having severe anaemia, that I refused a transfusion for as I wouldn't stay there any longer, and a womb infection.

Thankfully, it turns out people like me should definately have children because mine are gorgeous & love me to bits.

That's absolutely horrible. I can't believe people can be so cruel.