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  #1  
Old 28th March 2013, 10:25
The Jerk The Jerk is offline
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Default 40 year old Virgins..........

......... tonight on Channel 4
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  #2  
Old 28th March 2013, 12:11
daveysurfy daveysurfy is offline
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Default Re: 40 year old Virgins..........

thanks for the heads up!
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  #3  
Old 28th March 2013, 21:13
iTz0kt0Bu iTz0kt0Bu is offline
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Default Re: 40 year old Virgins..........

I wonder what type of ppl would be middle aged virgins.

Tbh, no offence, but i wouldn't be surprised if they had SA.
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  #4  
Old 28th March 2013, 21:16
iTz0kt0Bu iTz0kt0Bu is offline
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Default Re: 40 year old Virgins..........

Saying that^ I can see myself as being a middle aged virgin if I didn't build my confidence

I honestly need to work on building my confidence.
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  #5  
Old 28th March 2013, 21:54
syncsolo syncsolo is offline
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Default Re: 40 year old Virgins..........

Quote:
Originally Posted by retep
I wonder what type of ppl would be middle aged virgins.

Tbh, no offence, but i wouldn't be surprised if they had SA.
Most have more serious mental issues, low IQs, more than SA in most cases I'd bet, but sex from developing a relationship is more a challenge for guys on the whole it seems. Plenty of physically disabled middle age virgins also that will die as such most probably. These kind of shows depresses me anyway, apparently some guy in his 40s is going to lose his virginity to an american sex therapist in her 60s!
I'll be in the same boat as him in a few years, but I'd rather die a virgin than do that to be honest.
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  #6  
Old 29th March 2013, 10:29
The Jerk The Jerk is offline
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Default Re: 40 year old Virgins..........

.......... Clive is 45..........Chloe is 29, they couldn't find a 40 year old female virgin? Also interesting to note at the end of the show it said......Chloe has now got a boyfriend, but Clive is still single........... anyway, they are both brave to appear on tv like that....
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  #7  
Old 29th March 2013, 10:48
iTz0kt0Bu iTz0kt0Bu is offline
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Default Re: 40 year old Virgins..........

Oh, I though Chloe looked quite young to be 40

45 is 40, thats why i think Middle aged virgins is a more understandable term, although it can also sound a bit more offensive.

I couldn't watch the whole show since my younger sis and mum were with me.
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  #8  
Old 1st April 2013, 04:06
Austere_Lemur Austere_Lemur is offline
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Default Re: 40 year old Virgins..........

A guy called Gilmartin coined the term 'love-shyness'. Apparently this affects the heterosexual male more than the heterosexual female, homosexual male and homosexual female - precisely because, in olden times, men were expected to initiate courtship. Due to this; 'love-shy' men were at risk of never marrying or producing offspring.

Heterosexual love-shy women were still likely to date because all they needed was an assertive male. At the time of Gilmartin's survey, homosexual people weren't really recognised as being important (because they were a minority?).

I did a little essay on this during my short time at uni, and I was sceptical because I thought it was absolute rubbish - but then I do have to remember and respect that Gilmartin was writing in the past where social values were a lot more backwards than they are today.

I believe that 'love-shyness' can affect anyone. The heterosexual male does not deserve any more pity than anyone else. We no longer live in times when men have to actively go out and ask women on a date. Even then, Gilmartin left out how that would've worked for homosexual couples.

Other people would have it that women are much more assertive in today's world, and therefore love-shy men are much more common than love-shy women; the traditional views of men initiating the courtship have gone out the window.

When I did this essay, I also had to take into account how pornography was available to certain groups. I also spoke about how, in modern times, we must look at genetic factors (predispositions where applicable), nurture, religion and culture.

And the end of the day, I do not think that 'love-shyness' affects heterosexual men more than any other group - everyone can be affected by it, all equally. Also to take into account is that homosexual people have suffered persecution for their orientation and, as a result, have been less free when it comes to exploring their desires.

The heterosexual male has always had a lot more options available to him, in terms of partners, pornography, prostitutes - where some of these things have always been taboo for others.

Obviously SAD would be a big contributing factor. Again, this still isn't widely recognised (as I'm sure you all know!)
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  #9  
Old 1st April 2013, 16:32
HaveANiceDay HaveANiceDay is offline
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Default Re: 40 year old Virgins..........

Quote:
We no longer live in times when men have to actively go out and ask women on a date.
If we're talking about young men, then they certainly do still have to pursue women actively. The explanation is straightforward although often overlooked. There's a tendency for men to pair off with slightly younger women; the difference as reflected in UK marriage statistics is 2 1/2 years. The net effect of this is that there are far fewer unattached young women than young men. Back in the days when marriage was still a relatively fashionable way for men and women to pair off, this used to show up in government statistics, for example in the spreadsheet "Marital Status Population Estimates - Mid 1971 to Mid 1981" available here which shows twice as many single men as single women in the late 20s/early 30s age range. The ratio of unattached men to unattached single women was presumably even more extreme than that, and I don't suppose the situation has changed a lot since then just because marriage has become less popular. Given that the musical chairs are arranged this way, it would be quite odd if young men didn't in practice do most of the pursuing, with the extra challenge that can pose to somebody with even mild SA.

On the subject of the thread, I've known guys who have had to wait till their 40s and there has been absolutely nothing wrong with them; in their cases, not even SA.
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  #10  
Old 1st April 2013, 22:39
Fungus Fungus is offline
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Default Re: 40 year old Virgins..........

Quote:
Originally Posted by Austere_Lemur
the traditional views of men initiating the courtship have gone out the window.
Yes, but have you any evidence for that? I did a quick search on the internet and most of the women said they still expected the man to make the first move. I also worked in the same company for 20 years and almost always the man initiated all relationships all the time.
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  #11  
Old 2nd April 2013, 12:32
Fungus Fungus is offline
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Default Re: 40 year old Virgins..........

Quote:
Originally Posted by john smith
I think that's why some men go to the Ukraine or Russia to find partners/wives as it is a lot easier to meet women given the gender imbalance in both countries.
Well if you take the trouble to go to another country to find a partner then I think you are definitely taking the initiative.
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