my 'lack of awareness & understanding' problem

[jonasz14]

Hi everybody,
first post, long-standing problem

My SA is partly about being self-conscious primarily about a specific aspect of my appearance which got to BDD proportions some years back. Things improved or changed, clear digs stopped and I gave no opportunities to be rejected, until suddenly being asked out by a girl (too young) followed by a bunch of girls (also too young) coming over to sit behind me in a clothes store, hearing 'I know, I saw him as soon as he came in' I turned to see three of them sitting right behind looking up gooily at me.
The first incident normalised me, the sort of thing that happens, the second made me realise I was going to waste, out of touch ***8211; that I had a problem.
Prior to all this there had been the odd wolf-whistle e.g. but at least as many things to the contrary but similar followed to the point where seeing a bunch of girls ahead I'd flip record on my phone to capture evidence, sure enough capturing wolf-whistles and overt convo about consuming lollypops.
The problem: I can't use conventional understanding of these things myself ***8211; given the unusually vast spectrum of possibilities. As so many of the subtle (not verbalised) incidents could easily also be them being mean/making fun of. Each concept fits perfectly when trying to understand the behaviours, most basically looking at to different degrees. Specific e.g. arriving in a cue behind two girls one of whom saw me arrive, whispered something to the other, I was no surprise when I saw her mate then have a sly little look, confirming it was about me.
Typically eye-contact when your out, in passing ***8211; could be nothing, but now I can't help but wonder if its good (and wasting it) or bad also. One of the clearest not-verbal incidents was with someone of model calibre so again the spectrum is vast. Caught this girl I commuted with, and was impressed by and interested in (platonically), looking followed by the quick look away that's supposedly a good sign but I can't buy it. I could be approaching someone who isn't just not interested but who thinks your weird/horrible looking. Totally embarrassing myself, cringeworthy - which will serve only to setback further still
I feel its a not understanding the situation, so not knowing how to react to it. And when there is no situation

Makes the whole 'courting' process uncomfortable.
Cant be right to approach when so confused inside (i experimented a while back and it only justified the confusion). And can't even pick up on signs I should,

Ha anybody else had and/or overcome this. Is there a name for it?
What do I do about this, where should I go to sort this out?
I guess just want to be less of an outsider and in the world - finally - and stop living like this.

Thanks guys,