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  #5071  
Old 2nd December 2019, 18:58
mutedsoul mutedsoul is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Yeah ^, popular film as well. Most films I’ve seen, the rare times I go cinema don’t have as many people in the room.
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  #5072  
Old 4th December 2019, 13:53
mutedsoul mutedsoul is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Followed the meditation clip my therapist sent twice today. That’s an achievement for me.
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  #5073  
Old 7th December 2019, 05:07
Purplesnarf Purplesnarf is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

^ Well done, hope this will help you in the long run mutedsoul
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  #5074  
Old 11th December 2019, 18:13
mutedsoul mutedsoul is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

This may seems little to some but I brought a smart trench coat, not a very expensive one though and wore it to work. Maybe it’s too smart to wear to a kitchen porter job that’s messy.

At first I was uncomfortable wearing it as I don’t usually wear such clothes but I became a bit more comfortable wearing it and plan to wear it more.

Though I noticed, I think the receptionist may have been surprised I wore it cause I said hi as usual but today they turned their head quickly.

But I feel I have reached the point where I don’t care enough to not wear it cause people mostly seem to judge me more for my shyness than getting to know who I am. They seem to assume I’m somehow beneath them, that’s what I suspect especially since I’ve received the silent treatment from multiple people at different jobs.

So I’m dammed if I do or don’t. So I’m wearing it, I’m not what people say I am.

I brought it cause I felt I liked the look.
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  #5075  
Old 12th December 2019, 09:42
Jen. Jen. is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Are you sure it was because of the coat? That does seem like a strange reaction to it, unless you were also wearing a fedora or something. The receptionist turning their head could have been completely unrelated.
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  #5076  
Old 13th December 2019, 08:05
mutedsoul mutedsoul is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jen.
Are you sure it was because of the coat? That does seem like a strange reaction to it, unless you were also wearing a fedora or something. The receptionist turning their head could have been completely unrelated.
Maybe I was anxious in it. The next time the receptionist was better. It can be cause of the coat as I’m a kitchen porter and seen as low status generally at the workplace. My uniform is also messy due to cleaning the kitchen, doing deliveries also so wearing something smart is a contrast to the job role.

It wasn’t unrelated or if it was it was something I may have been doing as the reception is empty in the mornings.
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  #5077  
Old 13th December 2019, 12:34
Jen. Jen. is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Social anxiety is about not interpreting reality properly though, isn't it? Believing that situations are harmful when they're not, believing people are judging you when they're not, etc. It's when a person's reactions don't appropriately match the reality of a situation. From what you describe, it just doesn't make any sense. If you genuinely believe that the receptionist thought your new coat was somehow inappropriate for your job role and that you shouldn't be wearing it, and in response to that thought turned their head so as not to look at/talk to you because they were so disgusted, then... fine. It really could have been down to anything at all though, so it doesn't make any sense to assume anything. Just continue saying hello and being friendly as usual, otherwise it'll be how you're feeling about it now that causes a situation with them in future.
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  #5078  
Old 13th December 2019, 13:55
mutedsoul mutedsoul is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Doesn’t mean people don’t judge you. There is such thing as being taken advantage of, being looked down on, getting the silent treatment. Let’s not pretend that that doesn’t exist. People aren’t all good, no one is, but understanding why they are the way they are makes us more understanding. I don’t hate the receptionist for what he did but I found it interesting. Perhaps if I was in his situation I would do the same.

Maybe it was my body language, maybe I admittedly also have the wrong perspective but I’m not going to pretend his reaction was typical and just forget about it or blame myself for inviting such reaction.
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  #5079  
Old 13th December 2019, 22:57
ᚦaul ᚦaul is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

^
Its probably your reaction to how you think you are being perceived which is creating conflict. it often is with these things. a bit like overcompensating and making something out of nothing which would then create conflict between you and others. so with "being looked down upon" and disrespect, if you then for example over compensate and try to then usurp others as a way to perceive you are taking back control either directly or indirectly, it's probably gonna get peoples backs up.
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  #5080  
Old 14th December 2019, 12:10
ᚦaul ᚦaul is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

^ this is what is meant by creating something out of nothing. the best approach would be what has already been said, to carry on as normal and not get "defensive" or "intense" as you're probably not interpreting the situation correctly. if you let your problems get the better of you it's just going to create problems between you and other people!
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  #5081  
Old 14th December 2019, 14:57
mutedsoul mutedsoul is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

The situation happened and I'm thinking what I want to think of it. Idk, if I came across somehow posting it over here but it did happen. Maybe on my original post I came across a bit irrational, I probably am when it comes to stuff like this, but the head turn did mean something and people do react differently when you wear different stuff. It's true that there could be other reasons the receptionist acted the way they did that day, maybe my body language and stuff.

I don't really want to talk more about the situation.
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  #5082  
Old 19th December 2019, 19:00
Counterpoint Counterpoint is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Had a nice experience working with some children last few days. As the years role by I found there wasn’t an age group that didn’t cause me anxiety in some form, but I think working more with kids might be an opportunity to find some connection to life again. Children are mirrors of our own behaviour, and if I’m withdrawn and quiet I am virtually invisible to them, and that is quite a powerful, although painful, lesson to learn. They’re the most honest therapists.
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  #5083  
Old 13th January 2020, 04:44
Bluebear Bluebear is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Quote:
Originally Posted by Counterpoint
Had a nice experience working with some children last few days. As the years role by I found there wasn’t an age group that didn’t cause me anxiety in some form, but I think working more with kids might be an opportunity to find some connection to life again. Children are mirrors of our own behaviour, and if I’m withdrawn and quiet I am virtually invisible to them, and that is quite a powerful, although painful, lesson to learn. They’re the most honest therapists.
Good post (I added some of my own experiences and thoughts but deleted them). I hope it goes well for you
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  #5084  
Old 13th January 2020, 05:00
Bluebear Bluebear is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

I have certainly felt that people have treated me differently when I have worn ''smart modern'' clothes vs some very old clothes I liked but which were looked down upon by the fashion police. Although my body language etc has also been noted at times by people who look down on anyone who seems different. If I'm feeling relaxed I'm accepted.. if I'm withdrawn etc.. not so much. Just my experience. I did post an ''on topic'' post earlier which I deleted. As in a small achievement. I decided it was ''too small''...
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  #5085  
Old 16th January 2020, 08:41
Veni Vidi Vado Veni Vidi Vado is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

72 hours cigarette free !
I dreamt about smoking last night
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  #5086  
Old 17th January 2020, 00:35
Appear Appear is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Not today, but yesterday I went to a meditation class just down the road. I've had my eye on it for a while but have previously just done the easy thing and put off going. It was a pretty great experience and I chatted to a few people there without too much of the usual new context awkwardness. Think I'm going to try to make it a weekly thing.
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  #5087  
Old 18th January 2020, 12:12
Pink*Lady Pink*Lady is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

^Well done Appear.

I went to town today and bought some new clothes for work. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.
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  #5088  
Old 18th January 2020, 19:19
Professor Willow Professor Willow is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

I ventured to the theatre today, on my own.
Luckily it's a small theatre and most of the people there were older, which I find much less intimidating than being around younger people.
And I thoroughly enjoyed watching The Buddy Holly story.
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  #5089  
Old 19th January 2020, 20:09
Bluebear Bluebear is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Quote:
Originally Posted by D1662
I ventured to the theatre today, on my own.
Luckily it's a small theatre and most of the people there were older, which I find much less intimidating than being around younger people.
And I thoroughly enjoyed watching The Buddy Holly story.
Sounds good.
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  #5090  
Old 20th January 2020, 14:42
Jen. Jen. is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

I used the film developing kit I got for Christmas for the first time this afternoon and it was successful! I'm so happy. It was quite straightforward really, once I'd worked out the order and timings for everything. The roll is hung up drying now so I can't scan it yet, but from holding it up to the light it looks like everything is as it should be.
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  #5091  
Old 20th January 2020, 16:17
Tonkin Tonkin is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Did you need a darkroom for that?
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  #5092  
Old 20th January 2020, 16:21
Jen. Jen. is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

The kit came with a big black cloth bag with arm holes in it so I used that. I practised with a spare roll a few times outside of the bag, winding it round the loop thing in the canister, then tried it with my eyes closed until I knew how to do it without looking, and it was fine (although I nearly cut myself getting the roll open in the bag). Once the film is inside the canister you can take the canister out of the bag since it's designed so that light can't enter from the hole you pour the chemicals into, so there's no need for a dark room. I have a scanner that takes film so just use that on the negatives I've had developed elsewhere.
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  #5093  
Old 20th January 2020, 16:31
Tonkin Tonkin is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

That sounds cool. I developed film in a homemade dark room a few times back in the day.

Dipping the prints in the trays for set amounts of time to get the colours right etc,
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  #5094  
Old 22nd January 2020, 02:27
Bluebear Bluebear is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Didn't **** up totally and do something utterly stupid. For me that is an ''achievement''..
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  #5095  
Old 24th January 2020, 11:41
AireleeBray AireleeBray is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

yesterday I got a job (not nights like i talked about in another thread) it all happened very quickly & im so scared. it's that whole thing in my head of half happy half not wanting to.

plus I should drive but I'm still too scared to be on my own & something going wrong. so I'll be walking for now.
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  #5096  
Old 24th January 2020, 11:47
jigglypuff jigglypuff is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Thats awesome!
I dont drive but your still new to it so once your more familiar i bet it will get easier over time
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  #5097  
Old 24th January 2020, 17:27
AireleeBray AireleeBray is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

Thankyou both
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  #5098  
Old 29th January 2020, 05:09
Oddity Oddity is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

I was following an ambulance, they were only going about 40-45 so I'm guessing whoever was in there was in a very unstable condition. Anyway, I bloody overtook them didn't I It was quite nerve wracking due to us being the only vehicles on the road, night time, and the fact the ambulance was being escorted close behind by a FECKING POLICE CAR! I think I managed to do it without speeding I could easily have just stayed behind all the way home.

(It was last night, but I'm posting in here due to being quite the rebel).
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  #5099  
Old 29th January 2020, 17:20
newbs16 newbs16 is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

At times anxiety does get the better of me. But on a positive note, it doesn't always get the better of me and sometimes I think sod you what's the worst that could happen
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  #5100  
Old 29th January 2020, 22:19
anxiouslondoner anxiouslondoner is offline
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Default Re: What I did today - for small achievements and cheers

I hosted an open evening at a makerspace tonight. This means greeting visitors, showing them round and answering any questions they may have (or finding a nearby expert)
Luckily just three people turned up tonight, so it wasn't unbearable.
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