How is everyone feeling? (3)

[Rebekah]

I'm feeling rather depressed at the moment.
A "friend" of mine has cut all contact with me because I can't bring myself to go out and drink with her.

I'm also worried about tomorrow because I have to go shopping in town and in the evening I've agreed to go for a meal with a few people (which I hardly ever do). So I'm hiding under my duvet just at the thought of tomorrow.

[djaa1978]

Have you explained to her about your S A. If she is a real friend she would want to meet you NOT in a pub and in another way. If she doesn't, well you are better off without her.

I have cut links most of my friends who frequently act in selfish ways.

[Rebekah]

I've tried explaining to her many times and she said she understood but now so it seems she doesn't. I have tried explaining to her once again about my agoraphobia and she still doesn't want to know. We've been friends for a few years it's a shame to cut it off now but theres nothing I can do.

[djaa1978]

I am 30 and I have been friends with one bloke for 30 years. We have both changed a lot. We both get on well, but we are both drifting in different directions. I hope we are both still friends when we are 40, but who knows.

[Asymmetric Being]

Big to everyone not feeling too good.

I'm feeling angry and very cold at the moment

My boiler has packed up - no hot water and no heating, and the number I have for the landlord is no longer in use. I've contacted the person that does the gas check every year, he's away and doesn't have the number with him. I've called at the house up the road (after psyching myself up ) that also belongs to the landlord and they're not in.

At the moment, my only option is to call someone out myself, but that is going to cost me, and not sure if I will have enough. My rent goes out the bank tomorrow so can't cancel it to cover the cost. I'm sure he'd contact me with his new number then

I'm gonna have to wait until the morning and see if my neighbours are in, after that I'm not sure what else I can do

[Kop4]

Hi, Im grand thanks.

Xmas was good and hopefully so will the new year!!

Hope eveyone else is alright and doin good.

All the best

Kop4

[Ben]

Originally Posted by LeDree

Have been thinknig about life and such and battleing with the reality of thinking about it with logic. I realised that there is no mystery nothing is covered up it is all here. People like to over complicate things and over analyse them to the point where the origional meaning or the origional point is lost. Why do we cover up these things that don't need covering up? Why do we need to think that there is somthing all knowing that watches over us? I am fine with that idea I find it more comforting to know that there is nothing watching over me that would torture me for stupid things that don't even matter.

Welcome back! What are you covering up? Sounds like you had a cerebral crimbo. Are you saying you realised there is no god?

[Ben]

Originally Posted by Godfather

I just have no idea what I'm doing with my life. I just seem to live from one day to the other. No real plan, no real order, no foresight, and every time I try and get a plan in order it never works out. Everything and everyone seems to move forward whilst I'm stuck in time.

Do you have a plan, do you have goals? I saw it on one of those crappy motivation pictures, but this saying seems apt.."if you have no target, you won't hit anything". What would make you happy?

[Pal]

Have an ear infection and i slight sniffle, otherwise feeling rather good.

[doomlord]

Sore head and sore eyes. ive been on here too long.

[prettyodd]

Drunk so im all good atm.
Not looking forward to the new year though

[wd40mk17.4]

dwelling on past glories, and festering in present un-motivation.

[Reddix3]

Thoughtful, excited, hopeful and scared. Going to try something new next year. Might keep a blog of it all if I can. Just need to beat the 'cant be bothered' mentality ive been hiding behind for the last 14 years :-D

Love n Hugs to all

[RattyLady]

Panicky about money

Panicky about whether or not my brother hates me

Panicky about job-hunting in the New Year

Ick.

[LeDree]

Originally Posted by Ben

Welcome back! What are you covering up? Sounds like you had a cerebral crimbo. Are you saying you realised there is no god?

Well I've always believed that there is no god because I find it illogical. But it's more like it is in our nature to cover things up or to lie. Almost every thing is made of lies which sounds terrible but it's not. A lie is simply something that is not true but made out to be. We base our lives on this. Imagination itself could be called a lie because it is false. I just find it intriguing. I guess looking at art as well and all the bullshit that surrounds it. People need to have meaning a reson or else they can't understand it, so they do this and create meaning pages upon pages of meaning and you can't see the art for all the meaning and the person completely misses the point. And the point is there is no point. It is just there.

I'm so rubbish at explaining. I did a cartoon about this where there was like the artist standing next to a framed sock and this critic or person was remarking to the person next to him somthing like "ah yes now this piece is clearly a statement about art, life, society or all of the above" and then the artist is just standing there thinknig "its jsut a sock" I also drew it in pink and wrote two pages about how there was no meaning behind me chosing pink. I didn't agonise over it or experiment with all the colours to find that pink was indeed the perfect colour for that drawing. I wrote in big pink letters "Pink is irrelevant as it is irronic".

I hope that makes sense.

[brian_maiden]

I've been in a really bad mood this morning and I don't like it. It's mostly caused by technology, my bloody router has been playing up again, first losing internet connection all night last night, and all this morning, then apparently my parents got the internet back, but this morning the router wasn't even appearing on my networks list. So I get in a strop when I ask my mum if she knows what's wrong with it (pointless question, because she never does), only to then have to try and explain the difference between them being able to connect to the internet, and me connecting to the router... so then I go upstairs, reset the router for the 3rd time this morning, and that time, with people watching, it decides to work, making me look like an idiot! That router hasn't worked properly since the day we got it, and I can tell it's on the way out now, but I will have to wait until it actually dies before they do anything about it, or else put a big dent in my savings to buy a new router myself...

[LeDree]

cj0hn0 : Thanks for your comments I know there's no esacping the meaning even if you say somthing has no meaning that is still a meaning it's insane but it blurrs the line between that and the 'truth'. Maybe lie is too strong a work but I didn't mean it in a bad way. It is true if you all deside somthing is true then it is. I find it really interesting.

Originally Posted by Cynic

I agree with regards to the G0d of the Bible and other "holy books". However, there must be some kind of supernatural out there, like how did the Earth, the Universe and the human race come to being? I believe the answer is above human comprehension. I could never say that there definetely is or isn't a G0d.

Well I have been thinking that maybe there is just everything broken down and the universe and such is in a constant state of expanding then contracting. Like maybe it expands to a certain size and then contracts back down so everything gets smooshed together and then this rapid contracting and smooshing makes it explode out again and this happens over and over. Kind of a like a renewal.

I also think there must be somthing else out there that's alive just like us yet completely different.

brian_maiden : I hate technology too when it doesn't work.

[Ben]

Originally Posted by LeDree

cj0hn0 : Thanks for your comments I know there's no esacping the meaning even if you say somthing has no meaning that is still a meaning it's insane but it blurrs the line between that and the 'truth'. Maybe lie is too strong a work but I didn't mean it in a bad way. It is true if you all deside somthing is true then it is. I find it really interesting.

Meaning is assigned to a fact by an observer, nothing intrinsically has any meaning until it is assigned one by an observer.

Meaning is just an observers commentary on a fact/event, and one persons meaning can be different from some1 elses. Surely 'meaning' is strictly just one persons opinion about a fact, and not a definitive statement of truth about the fact.

A lot of SA folks say their life is one big lie, is that what your getting at?

[prettyodd]

Annoyed.
Just been trying to put a treadmill together, opened it and one of the corners is all cracked and one of the parts is missing :rolleyes:
Id rather just leave it and have wasted my money than bother asking my dad to help because all he will do is moan at me for breaking it and loosing a part and it will all be my fault. I know for a fact that it wasnt me but that wont matter. grr

Im so tired aswell only had 2 hours sleep last night..AGAIN!

[Rebekah]

I've just been shopping in town (first time in ages) and I hated it. I was made to queue in a shop for over an hour. I was doing this for my little brother and even he noticed that I wasn't dealing with it very well. I had hot flushes and I began to get a nervous twitch I must have looked like an idiot lol. Now I'm back at home and I feel better because I've returned to my 'bubble'.

I have to go back out later on for a meal with some friends and because I don't want to lose them (because of my agoraphobia), I'm forcing myself to go no matter how horrible I feel. My headaches have already started because I'm nervous about it so I'm going to try and calm myself down.

[prettyodd]

Originally Posted by Quiet bloke

^ is it new ? You should return it.

Yeah it is but then my dad will want to know why im returning it and he would have to look at it first to see if he can fix it. Stupid really but i just cant be bothered with the hassle and having him telling me its my fault for not waiting till he could do it. The only reason i decided to open it now is because its been sitting in the hall for days and ive been being moaned at to move it and my room isnt big enough for the whole box to fit so i had to take it out first. :rolleyes:.

[threadbare]

completely yuck. don't know if it's SSRI withdrawals or am coming down with something, but i've just slept for about 3 hours solid and still can't wrench myself out of bed. being ill is so much more boring and pointless when you're officially on holiday anyway.

[custardcreams]

Originally Posted by Rebekah

I have to go back out later on for a meal with some friends and because I don't want to lose them (because of my agoraphobia), I'm forcing myself to go no matter how horrible I feel. My headaches have already started because I'm nervous about it so I'm going to try and calm myself down.

good luck. do your friends know about your agoraphobia?

Originally Posted by threadbare

completely yuck. don't know if it's SSRI withdrawals or am coming down with something, but i've just slept for about 3 hours solid and still can't wrench myself out of bed. being ill is so much more boring and pointless when you're officially on holiday anyway.

poor thready. i managed to disturb myself so much coming off the meds that i am just staying on the lower dose for the time being. so i suppose it would be better if you have caught something rather than it being that! lots of flu and stuff going about apparently. make sure you have lots of hot toddys to hand... almost worth being ill for, they are...

[threadbare]

Originally Posted by custardcreams

make sure you have lots of hot toddys to hand... almost worth being ill for, they are...

hehe! so there is an incentive for being ill on holiday after all. thanks for the tip, custs.

[brian_maiden]

Horrible

I don't know if you remember me saying a few weeks ago that I had been planning to go out on new years eve with a friend, but she cancelled because she didn't have a baby sitter... and I was wondering at the time if it was just a cover and that I would probably end up seeing pics uploaded to facebook the next day of her out having fun without me...

Well guess what? I've found out she is going out, and without me. And whats worse, she's going out with this total scumbag who cheated on her, lied to her, treated her like shit, and I was there to pick up the pieces... as far as I knew she was never going to speak to him again, she's not told me otherwise, but she's now not only talking to him, she's going out on new years eve with him, when she had arranged to go out with me.

I may as well just chuck myself under a train If that's how the person who I thought was my best friend is going to treat me, what hope do I have?

The twist is, I have actually been invited out with someone I really like now, and I almost certainly can't go because it's to far away

[brian_maiden]

I don't know if I can take this any more. It's to hard, and every time I manage to grab hold of some kind of a life, it gets destroyed and I get kicked back down again.

I really want to go any meet her. Getting there is easy enough, it's getting back, or getting a place to stay. Plus i've never been drinking in London before, it's scary for me, and it will be the first time meeting her as well, so that's scary. I really want to meet her, and I really want to go, I'm just not sure I can handle it, and I'm scared.

And the way I am feeling now because of everything else, it all just seems so hard

I don't know what to do

[Rebekah]

Originally Posted by custardcreams

good luck. do your friends know about your agoraphobia?

Yes they know and I tried explaining it to them again. But it's hard to tell someone who finds going out normal, that you don't like going out.

Originally Posted by brian_maiden

I don't know if I can take this any more. It's to hard, and every time I manage to grab hold of some kind of a life, it gets destroyed and I get kicked back down again.

I really want to go any meet her. Getting there is easy enough, it's getting back, or getting a place to stay. Plus i've never been drinking in London before, it's scary for me, and it will be the first time meeting her as well, so that's scary. I really want to meet her, and I really want to go, I'm just not sure I can handle it, and I'm scared.

And the way I am feeling now because of everything else, it all just seems so hard

I don't know what to do

I feel sorry for you, it seems like you're going through a rough time at the moment. I hope things get better for you soon.

[likeme]

I think I'm beginning to feel a bit more normal. I've been home (to my parents) for a week and coming back to my-life-away-from-home always stresses me out. I lose confidence due to having been back in the place where I spent so many hermitted years. When I leave there to come back to my 'other life' as it were, I find myself doubting whether I can do it all-over-again, worrying about my social skills and feeling weak and unworthy. It's not much fun. Coming back on sauk has helped me to feel a little more like I am 'one of everyone' and not the outsider I have percieved myself to be. Although looking back at some old posts of mine made me cringe. How is it that a change of scene can change my sense of self so significantly?
Now I need to not worry about what I have written here.

[wd40mk17.4]

Originally Posted by brian_maiden

I don't know if I can take this any more. It's to hard, and every time I manage to grab hold of some kind of a life, it gets destroyed and I get kicked back down again.

I really want to go any meet her. Getting there is easy enough, it's getting back, or getting a place to stay. Plus i've never been drinking in London before, it's scary for me, and it will be the first time meeting her as well, so that's scary. I really want to meet her, and I really want to go, I'm just not sure I can handle it, and I'm scared.

And the way I am feeling now because of everything else, it all just seems so hard

I don't know what to do

go man, Lina and the guys will take good care of you, you'll be fine! you wont regret it.

[Mouse]

This is a penguin my parents adopted at Edinburgh zoo. They were invited to see it in the penguin parade.

When I asked how they knew it was theirs I was told that it called her
Mummy and asked for a fish.