SAUK Discussion Board

Go Back   SAUK Discussion Board > General Discussion > Games Room
Join! Blogs FAQ Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Notices

Reply  Post New Thread
 
Thread Tools
  #301  
Old 1st October 2014, 11:55
Gog Gog is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: in squalor
Posts: 399

Mood
Shoveit

Default Re: tell lies

I want to kiss Nigel Farage on the lips and have his babies.
Reply With Quote
  #302  
Old 1st October 2014, 19:29
Silent Ninja Silent Ninja is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Cambridge
Posts: 4,466
Default Re: tell lies

I'm a really happy and positive person and I enrich the lives of all those I meet.
Reply With Quote
  #303  
Old 1st October 2014, 22:51
Gog Gog is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: in squalor
Posts: 399

Mood
Shoveit

Default Re: tell lies

I often pull down my pants and crap on the floor in WH Smith if they dont have the latest issue of great british locomotives magazine.
Reply With Quote
  #304  
Old 1st October 2014, 23:03
Focused Focused is offline
Member
 
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Manchester
Posts: 2,934
Default Re: tell lies

I don't tell lies.
Reply With Quote
  #305  
Old 3rd October 2014, 12:55
Gog Gog is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: in squalor
Posts: 399

Mood
Shoveit

Default Re: tell lies

I like to hide in church doorways dressed as a monk then jump out and scare vicars.
Reply With Quote
  #306  
Old 3rd October 2014, 13:10
You Have 0 New Messages You Have 0 New Messages is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Asleep in your hedge
Posts: 206

Mood
Starving

Default Re: tell lies

I'd like to give David Cameron a hug.
Reply With Quote
  #307  
Old 3rd October 2014, 13:23
Z. Z. is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Up My Own Arse.
Posts: 11,235
Default Re: tell lies

The two women in the bakery today who were complaining about those on job seekers, and who said they were voting Conservative in the next election, were very intelligent and well informed.
Reply With Quote
  #308  
Old 3rd October 2014, 21:30
You Have 0 New Messages You Have 0 New Messages is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Asleep in your hedge
Posts: 206

Mood
Starving

Default Re: tell lies

Quote:
Originally Posted by stoopkid
oh me too...he looks so ' huggable', right?

i am a well balanced, clear thinking, over achiever who should really slow down a little to give others time to catch up.
Did I say hug? I meant cudgel.. I mean, cudgel.. erm (strains) cuddle.
Reply With Quote
  #309  
Old 3rd October 2014, 21:54
Clayman Clayman is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 724
Default Re: tell lies

I like to lick the salt and vinegar off chips and put them back in the packet.
Reply With Quote
  #310  
Old 3rd October 2014, 22:01
Rocket Spud Rocket Spud is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 12,615
Default Re: tell lies

^
Reply With Quote
  #311  
Old 4th October 2014, 07:51
Merritt Merritt is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: This abyss
Posts: 4,445
Default Re: tell lies

Dust is ceiling dandruff.
Reply With Quote
  #312  
Old 13th October 2014, 23:24
Gog Gog is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: in squalor
Posts: 399

Mood
Shoveit

Default Re: tell lies

Ellen DeGeneres started off as a part time bingo caller in Cleethorpes.
Reply With Quote
  #313  
Old 14th October 2014, 08:48
CyprusPluto CyprusPluto is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 848

Mood
Dead

Default Re: tell lies

Great British Bake Off is the best thing on TV
Reply With Quote
  #314  
Old 14th October 2014, 16:09
umm umm is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 1,371
Default Re: tell lies

I always lie.
Reply With Quote
  #315  
Old 14th October 2014, 16:19
CyprusPluto CyprusPluto is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 848

Mood
Dead

Default Re: tell lies

I never lie, because I'm Superman
Reply With Quote
  #316  
Old 18th October 2014, 22:47
Gog Gog is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: in squalor
Posts: 399

Mood
Shoveit

Default Re: tell lies

Cleo Laine used to be the stunt double for Adam West in Batman.
Reply With Quote
  #317  
Old 18th October 2014, 23:26
CyprusPluto CyprusPluto is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 848

Mood
Dead

Default Re: tell lies

I'm 6ft 5, built like The Rock and look like Brad Pitt
Reply With Quote
  #318  
Old 19th October 2014, 00:57
You Have 0 New Messages You Have 0 New Messages is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Asleep in your hedge
Posts: 206

Mood
Starving

Default Re: tell lies

Zip.. Thud...
Reply With Quote
  #319  
Old 19th October 2014, 22:51
Gog Gog is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: in squalor
Posts: 399

Mood
Shoveit

Default Re: tell lies

People with hairy arses are 57 times more immune to the ebola virus than a banana.
Reply With Quote
  #320  
Old 19th February 2018, 01:10
Kevin Hodge Kevin Hodge is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: lazy town
Posts: 25,915
Blog Entries: 51

Mood
Sneaky

Default Re: tell lies

My mate was just asking me why i started posting on here again and i had no idea what he was talking about. So I've logged on, changed my password, and I'm now going through the stuff that's been posted in my name over the past few days
Reply With Quote
  #321  
Old 19th February 2018, 13:04
anxiouslondoner anxiouslondoner is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Pandaemonium, SE27
Posts: 4,784
Default Re: tell lies

I'm only here to avenge the death of my brother, Neville, who was killed by a socially anxious ninja death cult who I heard lurk these forums.
Reply With Quote
  #322  
Old 19th February 2018, 19:25
Kevin Hodge Kevin Hodge is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: lazy town
Posts: 25,915
Blog Entries: 51

Mood
Sneaky

Default Re: tell lies

i just met you
and this is crazy
Reply With Quote
  #323  
Old 20th February 2018, 11:48
Merritt Merritt is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: This abyss
Posts: 4,445
Default Re: tell lies

The song Express Yourself by N.W.A. is about the joy of breastfeeding.
Reply With Quote
  #324  
Old 20th February 2018, 21:07
Kevin Hodge Kevin Hodge is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: lazy town
Posts: 25,915
Blog Entries: 51

Mood
Sneaky

Default Re: tell lies

stephen hawking has nothing wrong with his body, he just thought that being a kind of wheelchair cyborg person would increase his book sales. during the 70s he peddled a story that he had been unable to communicate with the outside world at all until computers were developed enough to translate his thought waves into sound waves, and that in his completely internalised world he had been busy rewriting the laws of physics. since that time people have become progressively less gullible and he has had to change his story.

if you ever see a thin man jogging in cambridge wearing a surgical mask it is likely to be professor hawking in disguise. i like to provoke him by shouting out things like "e equals mc cubed" and watch him twitch as he longs to correct me, but he daren't because he knows that regular lay people cannot comprehend such complex maths, and his ability to recite the correct equation would definitely give his identity away
Reply With Quote
  #325  
Old 20th February 2018, 21:59
anxiouslondoner anxiouslondoner is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Pandaemonium, SE27
Posts: 4,784
Default Re: tell lies

Sharks actually have arms and hands. It's true. They just keep them well hidden at all times. Would you get close enough to a shark to check? Especially as they might whip out their arms at any time and punch you with their sharky fists. They never wear wristwatches though.
Reply With Quote
  #326  
Old 23rd February 2018, 21:29
Kevin Hodge Kevin Hodge is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: lazy town
Posts: 25,915
Blog Entries: 51

Mood
Sneaky

Default Re: tell lies

you stole the sun from my heart
Reply With Quote
  #327  
Old 8th March 2018, 00:57
slrrrrp slrrrrp is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Brighton
Posts: 1,837
Blog Entries: 8
Default Re: tell lies

I have 10 wives
9 lives
8 husbands
7 elbows
6 squid
5 testicles
4 he's a jolly good fellow
3 in 1 coconut oil
2 you 2 me
And a parting on a my knee

-----------
Daniel
-----------
Reply With Quote
  #328  
Old 22nd March 2018, 21:51
Arpeggio Arpeggio is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2018
Location: France, and abroad when on tour
Posts: 13

Mood
Relaxed

Default Re: tell lies

I've eaten a hippo tonight.
Reply With Quote
  #329  
Old 10th April 2018, 21:31
Kevin Hodge Kevin Hodge is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: lazy town
Posts: 25,915
Blog Entries: 51

Mood
Sneaky

Default Re: tell lies

I shagged your ma
Reply With Quote
  #330  
Old 10th April 2018, 21:51
anxiouslondoner anxiouslondoner is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Pandaemonium, SE27
Posts: 4,784
Default Re: tell lies

I live inside your nostril.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools

Forum Jump


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 05:42.


SAUK Award
Logo designed by abc
Powered by vBulletin
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.