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  #1  
Old 12th August 2018, 00:02
hollowone hollowone is offline
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Default To afraid to reply to a fb message from an old friend

I know this might sound silly, but the reason I'm not logging on to reply is the fear of being asked what I'm doing with my life. The only update I can give is that I've been setting up 2 blogs on wordpress.com and learning various tunes, pieces and jigs, and been a regular at a folk session. I know deep down the reason people ask 'what have you been doing' is to start a conversation, not as a way to turn the conversation to an advice session.

I've got two choices;
a) do I log on and reply when a bit tipsy & feeling confident enough, but run the risk of saying something stupid, or
B) do I wait till another time, and run the risk of being too scared to even log in though not running the risk of saying something stupid?
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  #2  
Old 12th August 2018, 12:11
Aelwyn Aelwyn is offline
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Default Re: To afraid to reply to a fb message from an old friend

I can't see anything wrong in what you've been doing. Are you worried because you don't have a job?

What is the worst that could happen if you just told him or her the truth? If they're a real friend they're not going to judge you.
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  #3  
Old 12th August 2018, 13:13
hollowone hollowone is offline
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Default Re: To afraid to reply to a fb message from an old friend

Yes as a matter of fact, I'm embarrassed about my circumstances & fear having to give an explanation. To be fully honest would be as scary as jumping off a cliff into water of unknown depth. It's an incredibly powerful psychological forcefield.
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  #4  
Old 12th August 2018, 14:29
Aelwyn Aelwyn is offline
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Default Re: To afraid to reply to a fb message from an old friend

Quote:
Originally Posted by hollowone
Yes as a matter of fact, I'm embarrassed about my circumstances & fear having to give an explanation. To be fully honest would be as scary as jumping off a cliff into water of unknown depth. It's an incredibly powerful psychological forcefield.
I guess if you were going to have any kind of ongoing relationship with this person, you would either have to tell the truth, or just put up with whatever conclusions they might jump to. If you don't feel you can do either of those things, it seems to suggest your friends will need to be drawn from places like this website where people will understand the situation.

It's tricky, I know, and I do understand the feeling.
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  #5  
Old 12th August 2018, 23:48
snoo snoo is offline
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Default Re: To afraid to reply to a fb message from an old friend

I am facing the same situation as well, the only difference is that the message is now over a week old because I procrastinated over it.

It seems counter productive but I feel slightly divorced from the friends I had a few years back, because I have not followed the traditional path of having kids and a stable career (virtually everyone I know has done this).

I imagine meeting up and feeling inadequate, which is a really crummy feeling which takes a while (for me) to recover from and brings on other crappy feelings.

I think that is what I dodge, that feeling. Of course it's in our control whether we feel this or not, just don't know mentally how to adjust.
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