What do you get out of being here? or reading here?

[Mountainstream]

Validation? Connection? Understanding? ''Belonging''? Something else?

[gregarious_introvert]

All of the above!

I've said this before, but I found SAUK when I was at my lowest - and I owe this place everything. There has been support and understanding when I needed it and encouragement at other times. Without SAUK, I wouldn't have discovered meetup or had the two wonderful relationships which have helped me through these past seven years.

I have come a very long way in those years and I feel like part of a family here; as in all families, I've had disagreements with some (not that often) but those have been temporary. There are people here, some whom I've met and some I haven't, who - to me - are part of my life, even though they may not know it and don't feel the same about me. There are also those who have gone away and I miss, but I hope that they are living better lives now and I have also felt sadness for those we have lost.

I hope that some of my posts are helpful to some - I know that I don't post now as often as in the past but that doesn't mean that I don't care about everyone or want the best for all of you. I can never give SAUK as much as it has given me, but that doesn't mean I will ever stop trying. I dream of the day when I read that everyone here is leading the life they want and I am not ashamed to admit that I have been moved by stories of progress made by some people here. I wish there were more!

Sent from my SM-J330FN using Tapatalk

[Indigo_]

Similar to GI, and it may sound cheesy as hell, but this forum turned my life around. I have also had two relationships as a result of this forum and when my first partner died suddenly this forum was a lifeline.

[Aelwyn]

Because of the stigma that sadly still surrounds any kind of mental problems, there usually aren't many people we can talk to openly about them. It's valuable to have a place like this where these issues can be discussed safely.

The forum has been very interesting and helpful to me, and for several years I have had a much valued correspondence with someone else on this site.

It's also nice to feel we can occasionally help others who are in the same situation as ourselves.

[Toxic]

Old habit

I did meet a very good (and still ongoing) friend here who I meet up with regularly so thats a positive

I had a sketchy relationship from here (not ongoing!) wish I hadn't got involved with that one but cant really blame the forum, more my own fault.

It's nice to feel you can post stuff/have a bit of a conversation about things on here that wouldn't be so easy in real life, but mostly its a habit, I don't think I'd be particularly missed if I vanished from here, nor do I particularly contribute much but when I'm at my PC and not doing other things I have a bit of a forum trip and this just happens to be on the list.

[Mr. Nobody]

Originally Posted by Mountainstream

Validation? Connection? Understanding? ''Belonging''? Something else?

I notice you don't include "recovery from SA" or "help with SA" in your list of reasons you imagine everyone else uses this site,
which seems vaguely disdainful somehow?

[Mountainstream]

Originally Posted by Mr. Nobody

I notice you don't include "recovery from SA" or "help with SA" in your list of reasons you imagine everyone else uses this site,
which seems vaguely disdainful somehow?

Hi, not at all, I didn’t intend to be disdainful at all. I experience SA and I would like to be able to find help for it or to recover from it. I have found some helpful insights on here but haven’t found an improvement in my SA. Or my general anxiety and depression. I will keep trying though.

Someone asked me this question and I was not sure how to reply. I am not good with words. Sometimes people imagine I am disdainful or even nasty when I am far from that. In fact I try to be kind. However I do have a harsh inner critic (from abuse and depression etc) which tells me how worthless I am and how undeserving of even the respect that all (imho) deserve.

[Mountainstream]

btw sorry if my post sounded abrupt. I was having a bad day and so was worse with words than my usual.

[Mountainstream]

Thank you gregarious_introvert for your post.

Originally Posted by gregarious_introvert

All of the above!

I've said this before, but I found SAUK when I was at my lowest - and I owe this place everything. There has been support and understanding when I needed it and encouragement at other times. Without SAUK, I wouldn't have discovered meetup or had the two wonderful relationships which have helped me through these past seven years.

I have come a very long way in those years and I feel like part of a family here; as in all families, I've had disagreements with some (not that often) but those have been temporary. There are people here, some whom I've met and some I haven't, who - to me - are part of my life, even though they may not know it and don't feel the same about me. There are also those who have gone away and I miss, but I hope that they are living better lives now and I have also felt sadness for those we have lost.

I hope that some of my posts are helpful to some - I know that I don't post now as often as in the past but that doesn't mean that I don't care about everyone or want the best for all of you. I can never give SAUK as much as it has given me, but that doesn't mean I will ever stop trying. I dream of the day when I read that everyone here is leading the life they want and I am not ashamed to admit that I have been moved by stories of progress made by some people here. I wish there were more!

Sent from my SM-J330FN using Tapatalk

[Mountainstream]

Thank you everyone for the replies.

[Mountainstream]

I think you'd be missed. You took the time to reply to my post, and I'm unknown and even a bit prickly sometimes. I'm working on that. (being prickly)..

Originally Posted by Toxic

Old habit

I did meet a very good (and still ongoing) friend here who I meet up with regularly so thats a positive

I had a sketchy relationship from here (not ongoing!) wish I hadn't got involved with that one but cant really blame the forum, more my own fault.

It's nice to feel you can post stuff/have a bit of a conversation about things on here that wouldn't be so easy in real life, but mostly its a habit, I don't think I'd be particularly missed if I vanished from here, nor do I particularly contribute much but when I'm at my PC and not doing other things I have a bit of a forum trip and this just happens to be on the list.

[Mountainstream]

I agree about the stigma that still sadly surrounds any kind of mental problems. That is why I find a safe place like this to talk to be valuable. I also try to help other people occasionally (but am not good at it).

Originally Posted by Aelwyn

Because of the stigma that sadly still surrounds any kind of mental problems, there usually aren't many people we can talk to openly about them. It's valuable to have a place like this where these issues can be discussed safely.

The forum has been very interesting and helpful to me, and for several years I have had a much valued correspondence with someone else on this site.

It's also nice to feel we can occasionally help others who are in the same situation as ourselves.

[Bluebear]

Originally Posted by Nanuq

I didn't read that into it at all, and weirdly I think I get a little bit of all the things the OP said, a bit of validation from not being the only person that struggles on a daily basis from social anxiety, a bit of human connection, albeit online, a bit of understanding and maybe even a sense of belonging?
I don't come here thinking it will help me recover, more just to help cope. But maybe I am a particularly bad case? I think if I were intent on recovery I would be doing different things

I don't think you're a particularly bad case. I didn't think the post sounded disdainful either (but I'm not that smart )

[gregarious_introvert]

Originally Posted by Mountainstream

Thank you gregarious_introvert for your post.

You're welcome. I hope you're getting something from being here - you've seemed quite lost recently and I know there are times when nothing seems to help, but I'm hoping that you realise what a wonderful supportive group of people we have here and find something there to help you through.

Sent from my SM-J330FN using Tapatalk

[Mountainstream]

Originally Posted by gregarious_introvert

You're welcome. I hope you're getting something from being here - you've seemed quite lost recently and I know there are times when nothing seems to help, but I'm hoping that you realise what a wonderful supportive group of people we have here and find something there to help you through.

Sent from my SM-J330FN using Tapatalk

Thank you

[Rocket Spud]

Frankincense.