'You don't seem anxious at all'

[CurbYourAnxiety]

Does anyone else get this?

Every single medical professional i've seen for anxiety i have got this response, that's dozens of GPs, a handful of therapists and a couple of psychs.

Do i need to go in there drenched in sweat, shaking from head to toe with shit dripping down my leg from anxious bowels just to be taken seriously?

[Mo34]

Oh I get this in spades. More in the past than now. I've had from Gp's, a CPN, counsellors, work collegues and friends.

I've tried to explain that for the most of my life I've desperately tried to hide anxiety and am good at it. I've also tried to explain that my anxiety is like a spectrum - at the one end it's outward (nervous, heart palpitations, shaking etc and at the other it's inwards almost a kind of disassociation which can leave me disorientated, unable to process information and unable to cope in situations.

I think half the time the NHS seems to think you need to be frothing at the mouth and ready to throw yourself out of the nearest window to have a problem (in particular a psychological one as opposed to organic mental illness) that will warrant any proper worthwhile treatment.

[Ajax Amsterdam]

I have had that reaction in the past. I always went to extreme lengths to mask my anxiety, so I suppose it shows that I did a pretty good job of that for the most part. The immense amount of effort it took to try to give off a sense of reasonably calm normality really took its toll though. The whole thing was extremely draining and it didn't take too much for the mask to crumble.

I think anxiety disorders are a bit like an iceberg. People only get to see the relatively small bit at the top, and even that is something most of us mask extremely well. Few people actually get to see the sheer size of the problem that is beneath the surface. Also, what goes unseen often goes unrecognised, thus unacknowledged.

[Captain Nemo]

I experienced this with a mental health nurse I saw. Said she expected someone much more anxious - but I have also become good at hiding it.

Also, for me personally I am not likely to be too anxious in a secure place like a mental health practice, as I know it's a safe place where I can speak honestly about myself.

[Dougella]

Yes, me too. I've had to explain in quite a lot of detail before medical professionals would understand, I had to write my GP a letter at one point.

I think when people see me for 5 minutes they think, "She seems quiet but she can't really have any serious anxiety problems."

[BottleUpAndExplode]

Haha. That's precisely what every counsellor/therapist I've seen has said.I try to explain that the formal setting we're in, precisely to discuss my issues without any fear of judgement naturally puts me at ease. It's not the same as "real" everyday life. Don't think it's always been taken on board.

[neil324]

I had the exact same words from my one and only GP visit regarding SA.

Judging by that and the other anecdotes on here it seems the medical world has a complete lack of understanding about SA and they really know nothing about it.

[firemonkey]

Originally Posted by CurbYourAnxiety

Does anyone else get this?

Every single medical professional i've seen for anxiety i have got this response, that's dozens of GPs, a handful of therapists and a couple of psychs.

Do i need to go in there drenched in sweat, shaking from head to toe with shit dripping down my leg from anxious bowels just to be taken seriously?

I think that's half the problem or more. Even online sites make a big play of overt physical signs. However not all of us get the kind of overt physical symptoms you describe.

For me the biggest overt sign is mild hyperventilating. A less overt sign is a raised pulse (100/110+) which I only know about when I have my medical check at the depot clinic.

Is my anxiety any less real or severe because of the relative lack of overt physical symptoms? No!

[newbs16]

I went to the doctors several years ago explaining about my Ibs and how it's linked to anxiety. He gave me a questionnaire and then commented "Oh I thought your score would be much worse" I just explained to you low I feel and you don't give a ****.

[newbs16]

Originally Posted by CurbYourAnxiety

Does anyone else get this?

Every single medical professional i've seen for anxiety i have got this response, that's dozens of GPs, a handful of therapists and a couple of psychs.

Do i need to go in there drenched in sweat, shaking from head to toe with shit dripping down my leg from anxious bowels just to be taken seriously?

I'd have all these symptoms if I sat in the waiting room long enough

[Dimgeek]

I used to get this all the time whenever I went to sign on. I always thought it strange because I always felt so anxious that often I would be visibly shaking and barely holding back tears. If the idea weren't so terrifying maybe I could be an actor.

[Coffee]

I used to get this a lot too, we become quite good actors in order to cope yet don't even realise it.

[ashp]

to be honest i'm really glad to see everyone's responses to this, because i get this all the time too. i havent plucked up the courage to seek help from a GP yet, but when i've talked to counsellors they dont want to diagnose me because they think i dont seem anxious enough, and even when i talk to other people like friends and family they always say things like 'oh everyone gets that' or literally just being told that i dont seem anxious. ofc i dont seem anxious, i dont want anyone to know im anxious so i hide it without even realising i am sometimes. and its not always as bad everyday, but i dont see why people cant believe me when i say that im tired of always feeling self-conscious and walking around feeling like the whole world is staring and laughing at me. like im pretty sure its not normal to feel watched and flushed all the time and having to hide out in bathrooms because ur out of breath/overwhelmed. idk.

[CurbYourAnxiety]

I too am glad to see the responses, it's nice to know i'm not the only one that gets this all the time.

I also agree with you Coffee, i never thought about it but i guess a lot of us have developed into very good actors probably as a defense mechanism.

Slightly odd question but has anyone tried acting MORE anxious when visiting a GP, therapist, counsellor or whatever? think i may try this next time i go to the docs.

[David K]

Originally Posted by CurbYourAnxiety

Slightly odd question but has anyone tried acting MORE anxious when visiting a GP, therapist, counsellor or whatever? think i may try this next time i go to the docs.

Whenever I see a new doctor the first thing I tell them is that I can't help downplaying my symptoms, so they should account for that.

[Between The Bars]

You might be slight anxious at certain times, more anxious at other times.

How the hell would they ken???

[Between The Bars]

Originally Posted by Between The Bars

You might be slight anxious at certain times, more anxious at other times.

How the hell would they ken???

Follow up.

**** THEM.

[Ajax Amsterdam]

Originally Posted by ashp

... i havent plucked up the courage to seek help from a GP yet, but when i've talked to counsellors they dont want to diagnose me because they think i dont seem anxious enough...

Just wanted to point out that counsellors do not diagnose. It's not their job.

[Ajax Amsterdam]

Originally Posted by CurbYourAnxiety

Slightly odd question but has anyone tried acting MORE anxious when visiting a GP, therapist, counsellor or whatever? think i may try this next time i go to the docs.

I haven't. Actually being anxious has always just been a natural part of me although I've often tended to mask it very well. It's strange, but I actually wouldn't know where to start when it comes to trying to act more anxious. I can be it, but I can't act it, if that makes sense.

It's similar with recovery too. When I was consumed for decades by anxiety I often wondered if once I worked through it I'd be able to accurately describe how I did it. Well, I have come through it, and no, I can't accurately describe how.