Anyone used meetup.com?

[Tom Morello]

Thinking about going to a meet but really don't like the thought of meeting a group of complete strangers. I'm incredibly awkward around new people, my mind goes blank and I sit in silence usually. To be honest I don't like socialising in groups at all but I feel like I have to otherwise I'll continue to lack friends and relationship prospects (the bigger issue for me). Really don't know what the alternatives are to bolster my prospects.

[Mr. Nobody]

there's a few people on here who've moved from SAUK meets onto meet-up.com and done quite well,
I think it's almost like a 'next step' in recovery,
there's a few SA-themed meet-up groups too, which should be a gentler, easier introduction to meet-up meets.?

[newbs16]

Maybe you could attend a meet organised on here and then try using the meetup page. I have an account on the website but have only attended one meet which was a few weeks ago.

[Cepaea24]

I have been going to them quite regularly because I haven't had any luck organising stuff on SAUK. I have found them rather hit and miss, I have been going to a group aimed at introverts. When there is a smallish group it's quite good and I enjoy it, but sometimes the group sizes tend to balloon quickly and can be quite overwhelming especially when you are the organiser!

I'm going to one meant for people with anxiety problems this Saturday which might be better, but even this event has over 20 people and counting attending! If you can handle big groups go for it, i guess the large group size might just be a symptom of living in a large city like Bristol

[Tom Morello]

There aren't any Sauk meets around this area, I went to one in London a few years ago but the travelling was annoying. I should've mentioned that I'd prefer something local (Oxford area).I'm thinking about taking up something like yoga instead as it's less pressure socially and good for mind and body.

[newbs16]

^^ Most people will probably not attend when it comes to it

[newbs16]

There is a thing on Facebook called mental health friends it might be work looking to see if they have a upcoming meet, I'll have a look for you when I get home.

[Indigo_]

I've been to about 5/6 meets for SA peeps which I co-organised or organised on meetup. They all went really well and I met lots of friendly, lovely people

[newbs16]

Sorry it was called mental health mates

[sensitivesoul]

I love the idea of Meetup in order to cultivate the friendship circle I need in my own area. However, it seems very geared around group meets and I struggle with the idea of meeting a group of strangers, where I find it hard to speak out to the group and will likely be the quietest. I much prefer one to one contact and I have anxiety over initiating contact with people locally by message before a meet as it feels like not many really do the "chat online and then meet" avenue or doesn't feel as socially acceptable. I've tried and got rejected by locals when I reached out as a stranger to them through message although on the other hand, I did have one very socially out going and kind woman message me first at random and did strike up a connection where we've met up a few times now.

[βetty]

^^ there's lots of board game groups in Cambridge. Just saying... In fact I bet you two pounds there'll be one near you, they're everywhere! Even my village has one (which you're welcome to come to, it's very friendly. But probably a bit of a drive for a Monday evening :-()

[Indigo_]

Originally Posted by biscuits

Then on the day you can drop to the floor and roll out of there unnoticed.

A little bit like this...?

Why it's repeated over two and a half minutes I don't know

[βetty]

There's a couple on Saturdays that I know of, if I ever get brave enough to go along to one I'll report back

[hollowone]

@ Tom.

In my experience most people at meetup groups have been lovely; very accommodating and non-judgemental. It's generally OK to hit a few silences and not know what to say, most are in the same boat and have the same concerns. You will probably find quite a few shy people at some of your local meetups too, some maybe quiter than you.

RE the activity. Good point about doing something where there isn't the pressure to be talking all the time, Yoga looks like a great idea. Walking and other activities can be great too. Board games nights can also be great in that you've got the activity, plus plenty of opportunity to talk when you want to. If there are any events in your area like that, I recommend you go.

[Velcro-Touch]

I joined meet up in march since then I've been going to a group called 'social team games' in Edinburgh, it's basically a fitness class attended by people mainly on their twenties then pub after for food and drink if you're up for it

I've made a few new friends, and got practice on social situations particularly with women, I work and socialise exclusively with men so it's been good for me

Typically no one attends the social anxiety groups but I have been to a few other meetups, there is little pressure because people don't really know you and you may never see them again

I've noticed there maybe be hundreds of people in a group but only a handful will attend meet ups

[kite]

I have been tempted to many times but never really had the courage or the motivation to actually physically take myself there. But I like the concept of it, and it's a great tool for those who can go.

[wlien]

I've been on meetup for over 5 years now. I've made lots of people, some of which I might even call friends by now. Its also helped me with conversations and just being around people.