Joining a sports team

[OrdinaryJoe]

Has anybody joined a sports team as an adult after not having played for a few years? How did you find it? I have moved to a new area and am seriously thinking about joining a rugby team. I know when they train and it's just a case of asking if I can join in.

Obviously, I'm worried about making a tit of myself because I haven't played since I was a teenager. I'm also worried that I'm not going to get on well with anyone there due to my introverted nature. I can imagine people thinking, "what's the point in joining a team if you don't speak to anybody".

[Dounia]

I think this is a really good idea as long as you genuinely like rugby! The main point is playing so you've got a purpose and something to talk about.
I've given some thought to joining a team but decided against it. I've been going to fitness classes at the gym for a few weeks now. The same people go every week so I might make some friends but even if I don't I'm enjoying the classes anyway so I don't feel like I'm wasting my time. Everyone I've met seems polite, even if it's just a smile.
Hope you manage to give it a go!

[Bno1]

If ur not sure how to ask maybe just go watch and stand near coach or sum1 and say how r u hopfully there say ok you? And you say yeah just watching- actually are you looking for any other players you want to get fit so you can start playing again. Sorry sounds stupid written out but i try have a direction for the convo to go otherwise i go blank.
Because your in a new town would it help if you just keep telling yourself im in a new town nobody knows me. Maybe half a pint first for courage if it helps you then maybe your talk a bit and have the impression they like you(which im sure they will) in your head for next time? I know easier said than done. New town new start you can now let youself be yourself

[OrdinaryJoe]

Originally Posted by Dounia

I think this is a really good idea as long as you genuinely like rugby! The main point is playing so you've got a purpose and something to talk about.
I've given some thought to joining a team but decided against it. I've been going to fitness classes at the gym for a few weeks now. The same people go every week so I might make some friends but even if I don't I'm enjoying the classes anyway so I don't feel like I'm wasting my time. Everyone I've met seems polite, even if it's just a smile.
Hope you manage to give it a go!

Well, I love watching rugby! I used to play but I joined my last team as a kid and progressed through the age groups. It's a different kettle of fish turning up on your todd having not played for ten years. I have just joined a gym so I'm going to try and build my fitness up a bit first.

Originally Posted by Bno1

If ur not sure how to ask maybe just go watch and stand near coach or sum1 and say how r u hopfully there say ok you? And you say yeah just watching- actually are you looking for any other players you want to get fit so you can start playing again. Sorry sounds stupid written out but i try have a direction for the convo to go otherwise i go blank.
Because your in a new town would it help if you just keep telling yourself im in a new town nobody knows me. Maybe half a pint first for courage if it helps you then maybe your talk a bit and have the impression they like you(which im sure they will) in your head for next time? I know easier said than done. New town new start you can now let youself be yourself

That's a good idea about going to watch. Their website says they are recruiting players so hopefully they'd be quite welcoming.

I think the main reason I'm thinking of joining up is because I'm in a new town where nobody knows me. It makes things much easier. I detest bumping into old friends and acquaintances.

[SamD]

Yes. I have joined new football teams 3 times, all as an adult. It's a win win situation, because of course, you want to make new friends, but in the event that you don't, you're still getting a tonne of exercise. As the new guy, people will expect you to stay pretty quiet to start with, so there's no pressure to impress.

If you can just make ONE friend from sport, that can trigger a whole new social life. Even if that friend turns out to be no good for you, he/she will at some point introduce you to someone who's more compatible. You just need 'a seedling', to get things going and if you're into sport, playing it is certainly a way to plant the seedling.

[PussyRiot]

When I first moved to Oxford I joined a women's netball team - it was great fun and a good social life. They don't seem to have that up here in North Wales though unfortunately.

[José Raúl Capablanca]

I don't play in a sports team at the moment , But a few years ago I picked up the goalie gloves after a ten year hiatus, It was a small group and I had a great time getting back into it. I was always nervous before a match and still was overly critical of every goal I conceded but that was just part of my character, and in a way all part of what I enjoyed in the first place. there are all sorts of teams with all sorts of characters and like most things it was about finding the right team for me.

[GoldFish]

Yep! I joined at 27 by putting my name down at the sports centre as an emergency. This was to play basketball. I played for one season in a team that was sort of a bit neurotic. El capitano kept losing it over the referees and kept getting thrown out. One of the players hogged the ball from defense to offence every single time but his jump shot was around 80% efficient. I then left after a season when the player returned from overseas. As I was just an emergency. I am glad I did it. But it wasn't as good as when I played indoor soccer 9 years ago.

In terms of skill level, I was already practicing a few times a week. But I joined a B level team. Their reflexes are incredible. Mainly because they've been playing every year since young. So other teams passing speeds were just super fast, even for me. I am much better at basketball when there isn't traditional team structures, so I am good at 1-on-1 or 3-on-3. But being positioned as a main outside man to man defender in a zone point guard position didn't really suit my game. People were given specific roles. So it wasn't as casual as I would have hoped where you just go out and play your natural game.

9 years ago I played indoor soccer in a unisex team of really nice people. Kind of nerdy and not a lot of ego's. So that was a fun experience. We would go to parties as well, it was great. We won a few final series. It was kind of cool. Not sure anything could compare to that again. But certainly it is worth a try. Even if it's not what you expected it is still an experience. We'd go to each others houses and watch movies, futurama, drink, listen to music over the stereo, we were a really close team, until we just went our separate ways.

I think my interest in basketball meant that I was more likely to join and that shyness wasn't going to get in my way. Its incredible how when you are interested in things, you sort of go ahead with it, where as other things can be just too hard.

Give it a go. Remembering that you can always leave at any point.

In terms of getting on with people. If you join a unisex team then you might find it a bit easier. I joined an I.T. geeks team once and so it's a bit less intimidating if you can do that. But most teams have nice mild mannered players. There will always be the more egocentric ones and very confident ones as well.

[GoldFish]

Originally Posted by SamD

Yes. I have joined new football teams 3 times, all as an adult. It's a win win situation, because of course, you want to make new friends, but in the event that you don't, you're still getting a tonne of exercise. As the new guy, people will expect you to stay pretty quiet to start with, so there's no pressure to impress.

If you can just make ONE friend from sport, that can trigger a whole new social life. Even if that friend turns out to be no good for you, he/she will at some point introduce you to someone who's more compatible. You just need 'a seedling', to get things going and if you're into sport, playing it is certainly a way to plant the seedling.

Even if you don't make friends you still make acquaintances on some level, and if you don't then you can actually try to talk to people in the crowd on the sidelines or other teams as well.

[OrdinaryJoe]

Originally Posted by New Dawn Fades

I don't play in a sports team at the moment , But a few years ago I picked up the goalie gloves after a ten year hiatus, It was a small group and I had a great time getting back into it. I was always nervous before a match and still was overly critical of every goal I conceded but that was just part of my character, and in a way all part of what I enjoyed in the first place. there are all sorts of teams with all sorts of characters and like most things it was about finding the right team for me.

I've played in goal a few times and was always critical about the goals I let in too. God, it can be excrutiating knowing you've dropped a clanger and wanting the ground to swallow you up yet still having to carry on for the rest of the match knowing that your team mates are pissed off with you. I think you have to have nerves of steel to do that

Originally Posted by GoldFish

Yep! I joined at 27 by putting my name down at the sports centre as an emergency. This was to play basketball. I played for one season in a team that was sort of a bit neurotic. El capitano kept losing it over the referees and kept getting thrown out. One of the players hogged the ball from defense to offence every single time but his jump shot was around 80% efficient. I then left after a season when the player returned from overseas. As I was just an emergency. I am glad I did it. But it wasn't as good as when I played indoor soccer 9 years ago.

In terms of skill level, I was already practicing a few times a week. But I joined a B level team. Their reflexes are incredible. Mainly because they've been playing every year since young. So other teams passing speeds were just super fast, even for me. I am much better at basketball when there isn't traditional team structures, so I am good at 1-on-1 or 3-on-3. But being positioned as a main outside man to man defender in a zone point guard position didn't really suit my game. People were given specific roles. So it wasn't as casual as I would have hoped where you just go out and play your natural game.

9 years ago I played indoor soccer in a unisex team of really nice people. Kind of nerdy and not a lot of ego's. So that was a fun experience. We would go to parties as well, it was great. We won a few final series. It was kind of cool. Not sure anything could compare to that again. But certainly it is worth a try. Even if it's not what you expected it is still an experience. We'd go to each others houses and watch movies, futurama, drink, listen to music over the stereo, we were a really close team, until we just went our separate ways.

I think my interest in basketball meant that I was more likely to join and that shyness wasn't going to get in my way. Its incredible how when you are interested in things, you sort of go ahead with it, where as other things can be just too hard.

Give it a go. Remembering that you can always leave at any point.

In terms of getting on with people. If you join a unisex team then you might find it a bit easier. I joined an I.T. geeks team once and so it's a bit less intimidating if you can do that. But most teams have nice mild mannered players. There will always be the more egocentric ones and very confident ones as well.

Thank you for your response, Goldfish. I was forced to play basketball at school by my teacher because I was tall. We literally lost every single match we played. It's quite funny looking back at how hopeless we were.

I'm hoping that my interest in rugby will mean I can focus a bit more on playing the game rather than worrying about anxiety. It would be nice to make a few friends along the way too because it's a bit lonely at the moment.