What's worse; being unemployed or being in a job you hate?

[hollowone]

Hello.

You know how being in work can be significantly better for your mental health than being out of work, I'd argue that the wrong job can be just as miserable as being unemployed.

My idea of hell would be to work every hour god sends at something I hate, that's physically-demanding, socially-isolating, that doesn't get you friends & leaves you too exhausted to devote time and energy other things and having a social life. That to my mind is like a prison sentence. Unfortunately, the fear of ending up in a situation like that isn't widely-acknowledged by the system.

Has anyone ever heard the term 'ambivalence' & the wheel of change? When people want to give up things such as drinking, there are reasons they want to, benefits of doing so, yet at the same time there maybe fears and reservations. Ambivalence about change is widely-acknowledged by addiction specialists & in much material about quitting drinking and other bad habits. Bizarrely reasons why people might be ambivalent about work get no attention & are not acknowledged. The concept of ambivalence and the wheel of change is just as applicable to people who are long term unemployed as it is to people who're trying to give up substances.

Having had bad experience of workplaces in the past (I know I'm not alone, there's this youtuber I found) & having the above fear is one such reason for ambivalence which affects motivation.

The irony is more I read about change and overcoming the addiction, the more I see parallels with overcoming long term unemployment.

EDIT & DISCLAIMER;

The goal is not to discourage or dissuade people from taking up work but to address a common reason why people who're out of work might be struggling with motivation & to show that this particular reason is a more widely-acknowledged reason people might struggle with motivation to job hunt & for people in similar bots to not feel like they're the only ones.

[choirgirl]

"I was looking for a job and then I found a job
And heaven knows I'm miserable now"

Says it all really.

But depending on your circumstances, being unemployed is financially worse. They are both bad situations to be in. It's also probably easier to get another job that hopefully you don't hate from the position of being employed.

But if you mean, there is some benefit you are getting from being unemployed that is stopping you from moving forward, sure, I get it. Not having to get out of your comfort zone would be an obvious one for an sa sufferer. Familiarity. You give up a lot of control at work.

I did see some research once that claimed that very insecure work that you have no control over (like a zero hours contract) is just as bad for your mental health. Not surprising really.

Maybe it's not too good an idea to focus on the worst-case scenario. Who is to say you have to get a job that leaves you no time or energy for anything else? Only as a last resort, surely.

[Toxic]

Probably both as bad as each other

Only one leaves you financially better off so you can potentially buy things to stop yourself feeling as miserable...only you don't have any free time to enjoy them anyway.

[Schmosby]

I would say being stuck in a job you hate is worse. I feel very sorry for people who don't have the option to leave jobs that make them miserable due to financial commitments, it must be soul destroying.

[newbs16]

I think going to work is good for your health and finances but if you have to go to work everyday and hate your job and it's making you unwell than I think unemployment would be better.

[Indigo_]

I think being in a job you hate is worse. Having to get up every morning and stay all day at a place you hate I worked 5 and a half days the last 2-3 months and although money was a huge worry I was probably the happiest I'd been in recent times. Back to working full-time now though.

[Ronnie_Pickering]

only thing is most jobs are rubbish. So it requires a bit of trying to see a positive side of a job.

[Toxic]

I genuinely dont get people who enjoy their job

I always presumed people just did it because..you had to, a bit like school, turn up..keep your head down and make it through the day

I presumed you had a large amount of the population who hated every single second but had no alternative..and then the rest could "just about tolerate it but would rather not be there" I'm very much in the latter camp (unless i take a week off and come back to absolute chaos ) then its the first!

But yeah, I don't know, I suppose to love your job it needs to be something your dead interested in, something you set out to do, did the required qualifications/training and knuckled down till you got what you wanted. Fair play to them folk! I honestly can't think of a job I'd be happy/looking forward to getting to first thing on a monday morning!

[Indigo_]

I've never hated any job that I've had. I guess I've been incredibly lucky in that respect. The first school I taught in, for the first three to four years I loved it. I would jump out of bed in the morning excited to be going into work. I've become very disillusioned with the teaching profession since then and would be happy not to teach again. I believe I will always work in education though. It's what I've wanted to do since I was about 18/19.

[Gomen]

Unemployed no contest.

[FraidyCat]

If you hate your current job then find another job. There has got to be something which even if you don't love you don't absolutely hate either.

Also working part time is a good middle ground. And much much better than not working at all.

[Indigo_]

Originally Posted by jinny

Working with children definitely helps

But I don't know a single teacher who isn't wondering how to get out of the profession and do something else. The job has become ridiculous.

Absolutely.

Originally Posted by FraidyCat

Also working part time is a good middle ground. And much much better than not working at all.

I worked part time last year, it was great

[hollowone]

The thing is, the system is not about matching people with the right job, it's about getting people off benefits as quickly as possible, sod whether it's sustainable, sod whether it's something they're interested in sod whether it may result in a bad experience that might deter them from seeking work.

It all depends on your VALUES. You can make a simple comparison of being in work vs. being out of work. The pros and cons of being in work will be very conditional to the job.

RE the part time option; I have signed on to universal credit and put down 20 hours a week that I'm willing to work (I procrastinated like hell mainly due to fear of being forced into jobs I hate and being sanctioned which I'll talk about in a future post). There are two reasons for this;
1. I'm really tired all the time, sleep pattern is screwed and I struggle with mornings & am worried I won't cope (mentioned, advisor was understanding)
2. Fear of ending up in something I hate, if it's part time, at least I won't have the bulk of my waking life consumed by it (didn't mention).

[Tembo]

My period of unemployment was a much happier time than being working in a place that contributed to suicidal thoughts.

But, at least I had savings to use during unemployment, and I was able to move back in with Mum again rather than become homeless.

[edbander]

you have no sense of purpose being long term unemployed

[sophie123]

Being unemployed.

[Sunset]

I really don't like my job, but I remember being unemployed and living with my mum which was awful....far worse.

I think work gives some structure to your day and I know that I really appreciate the small things at the end of a working day...like getting in and having a cup of tea. I also like the solitude in the evenings, but on days that I'm off and not able to see my partner or a friend , the solitude is unpleasant.

I also look forward to the weekends and make plans for them....

[BritishPeace]

I see no value in work, so being in a job which I hated which I have.

[scarlettgirl]

Depends on how 'bad' your job is.
Most days now my work is bearable, but I still have many issues which can make me feel shit at the end of the day. I think it's just that I've been there so long now that it's become an uncomfortable familiarity. Stuck in a rut, but one I'm very used to! Plus now I just need the work for the practicality of keeping my independence. You know...having my own place and material junk.
When I was unemployed it was just as bad in other ways. And I think it did worsen my anxiety and alienate me even more from others. Unemployment naturally isolates you. There's no real routine to it, days blur together and everything feels meaningless. Arguable that working a job you hate is just as meaningless, but at least you're going out, you're seeing people, you have some connection to the real world. It has to count for something, right? I've never been *badly* bullied in a workplace though, so I can't speak for that experience.
Long story short in my experience; both bad, but for different reasons lol.

[gregarious_introvert]

As others have said in this thread, both have their disadvantages; however, the only reason I have ever hated a job has been because of bullying in the workplace and I've experienced just as much outside the workplace, so I'd have to say that unemployment, for me, has always been worse. When working, I have benefited from structure and a sense of meaning, as well as the income; when unemployed, anxiety over financial issues has become crushing and I've been more likely to become isolated and depressed.

Now, however, I have finally found the best solution; with disability benefits (ESA & PIP), I don't have the financial issues which came with previous spells out of work and can channel my energies into doing something useful (well, at least more useful than I ever did when working!).

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[hollowone]

Hello again,

a bit of an update

It depends on the job your in. i did a simple pros and cons evaluation. What I found out is that the pros and cons of work are dependent on the job you're in or looking for, whilst with unemployment, the pros and cons are constant.

I think I've sussed something, list as many of the pros of being in work you can think of, what you want out of a job and how it matches your interests, then the pros of being unemployed. Think about jobs and careers that rank the highest in these. This has made me feel a bit more motivated.

Anyway, I'll reply as best I can.

@sunset
you had great points; work gives you the structure. Being out of work it is INCREDIBLY with a capital I hard to think of ways to fill your time. There's also that element of appreciating the small things when you get when you get home, I must admit I miss that.

The solitude bit; yes, if you're around people all day, then it can be pleasant. If cooped in all day then it might drive you mad. On days where you're off and not able to see your partner & friends, that's pretty much the same situation.

@scarlettgirl
It does depend on how bad the job is. Whether we're unemployed or in a job we hate, we can become comfortable with it and fear change.

RE independence;
living at home & not having your own place is absolute rubbish, especially if you get mollycoddled & have a smother mother do everything for you (which I will make another thread about). Every time I've been living out of home or travelling, it's been INFINITELY better.

@gregarious
Bullying in the workplace, this is something that's affected my motivation to look for work, the fear that it might happen again. Most of my experiences of workplace have been negative.

(as skill that's not taught in school). Does anyone remember the Sims games, they used to have a meter that showed each need?

Why I made the post
The purpose was to address ambivalence about work, this being one reason why people might be. Ambivalence is definitely a factor that affects people's motivation to look for work, not 'laziness'. Two things motivated us; a) desire to avoid pain and b) desire to experience pleasure. We'll do more to avoid pain than we will to seek pleasure. It should occur to the JC, employment services and the general public that bad experiences of work (pain)+factors that keep you comfortable (pleasure)=disincentives and motivation problems to look for work (especially if coupled with jobhunting barriers, such as fear of interviews). Solution; work has got to be more attractive & unemployment has got to be more unattractive (job-dependent, jobs are not the same, unemployment is).

Conventional right wing 'get off your butt' types of people think more of the 'stick' is all that's needed (e.g. making you so poor & so lonely you'll take anything) with no attention to the 'carrot' (e.g. interests, values etc. that might match you to a job that WORKS and that MOTIVATES you to pursue it).