How is everyone feeling? (31)

[Amara 94]

Sociology and Criminology

[biscuits]

Great choices

[Professor Willow]

Sad

[Percy]

Sorry to hear that Prof Willow.

[Dougella]

^ 3 stabbings in one week? That's pretty bad.

[Tembo]

Originally Posted by Dougella

^ 3 stabbings in one week? That's pretty bad.

On further reading, it was more like 2 weeks, and one of those was a violent assault rather than a stabbing. But still….

[Percy]

Stabbings are on the rise and have been for sometime.

[Rocket Spud]

This is probably the worst i've felt this year.. ? Just a shitty period of feeling very low (with all the trimmings) and the nonsense at work. I desperately want a break from everything.

[Dougella]

^ I know it sounds like a standard response but do you think seeing a counsellor or therapist to talk things through with could be helpful? Also maybe seeing your GP? I'm sure once the stuff at your work is resolved (hopefully) that will be a weight off your shoulders.

[Rocket Spud]

The chances of getting a good therapist/counsellor for my circumstances is ridiculous. You get out what you put in too and i feel incredibly demotivated to even work with someone to help with myself. I need a sanctuary tbh. I want to go somewhere and get away for a good couple of months.

[Chess&Junkfood]

I hope it gets better for you soon, Spud! Sending the best your way!

[Dougella]

^^ I don't know about that, depression is a very common thing for someone to be suffering with, and sometimes just getting your thoughts and feelings out to someone can help, with no pressure to start working on anything if you don't feel able to do that yet. But I know what you mean, especially if you go through the NHS it can be very hit and miss so I understand your reticence.

[Amara 94]

Originally Posted by Tembo

^^ hope you’re feeling better today Prof. Willow!

I’m finding it really hard to stay positive. Believe it or not, I do tend to try and focus on the positives (but don’t tend to post when I’m feeling positive on here - I should do that more).
It really feels like most things are going backwards in this country.
Going for a walk tends to make me more positive, but my local tranquil spot along a river full of wildlife habitats is planned to be built on, and the river was found to have 1,000 dead fish in it due to the government allowing Southern Water to dump sewage in it.
Crime is increasing in my area - 3 stabbings over a week in my town. That’s (almost) unheard of for this area.
Someone at my work who I’ve known for years was always positive about everything and never moaned - but he has become more cynical lately. I’ve noticed this with a lot of people.

I know the grass isn’t greener, but I wish I took the chance to study abroad or work abroad back when we were in the EU. One of my work colleagues’ son who’s the same age as me did it, and is now applying for Dutch citizenship. But would I have been able to cope with living alone abroad back when I was 18? Probably not.

Rant over!

Did you see the stabbings?

[Rocket Spud]

Thanks, Chess

^^ Well yeah, but it's not just depression.

[Mo34]

^ Sorry your feeling rubbish Spud.
I know the feeling of just wanting to get away from everything for a bit.

[biscuits]

Sorry that you are feeling that way, Spud

^ we need an sauk world cruise, it seems so we can all escape for a bit.

[Percy]

Sorry you're not feeling good Spud. You can have biscuits for a day to cheer you up.

Good idea biscuits, you're paying.

[Tembo]

Right, whose driving? I nominate Percy. Just don’t try to turn around along the Suez Canal.

Spud, I hope things feel better for you soon. I can’t really give much advice, but could pulling a sickie be a viable option? I remember when I was so incredibly stressed at my previous workplace (to the point where i’d upset a trade union and a manager shouted at me), so I gave myself a day off work and took myself to an animal park. It felt so good. It didn’t make the problems at work go away, but I felt more confident dealing with it when I returned.

[Percy]

I'm driving?

[Rocket Spud]

Thanks, all

^^ Ha, i've taken 4 days off of the last 8!

I can't say for sure whether i'm going to go in tomorrow. There's a major part of me that wants to bring this chapter to a close and start again elsewhere. I really, really need somewhere i can settle and if that means working apart from others then so be it. If you go into a new work environment as part of a team, there's always the risk of being cast aside as a black sheep by a few rotten ***** and if you're the sort of person to let it happen then things go to shit soon enough. I do endorse working with people - i'd rather work with people, but what's the chances of finding somewhere ****-free... ?

[biscuits]

^ have you spoken to your brother about it - the depression side of things? I used to be really closed off from my family and now I tell my sister everything. It used to be impossible for me to talk about it, but now it's really hard for me not to overshare as well, so she needs some sort of prize!! It really helps to have someone close help to put things into perspective.

As for work. You can self certificate for a week then a doctor can sign you off as well. Your well being is the most important thing and if being in that environment is having a knock on effect and making mental health snowball, it's not worth going back.

Hope you find a more welcoming place to work and that something good can come from your absence e.g. them acknowledging and addressing their problem of workplace bullying.

It's their loss, rocket spud! Their loss!!

[Rocket Spud]

Hmm, i don't know your sister (obvs) but we're probably comparing apples and pears here. We don't have that sort of relationship at all and i'm rubbish at opening up anyway even to people that encourage it.

I haven't looked at the things i'm able to do where sickness is concerned and i don't really want to do that to the company. It's family-run and they've been exceptionally good to me so i won't drag this out unless they're happy to give me the time off in sickness as a grace period before seeking employment elsewhere.

I'm not sure what the aftermath will be from all this if i do go. I think they'll be more watchful of things around him but tbh i let this situation develop and it takes a certain type of person to let that happen. I really need assertiveness lessons - i've always had a problem in that area and i'm certain it's hindered my prospects.

[Merry]

^ Have you tried researching about assertiveness online? I don't know if that's any use? But there might be some advice that's helpful.

I'm feeling stressed and miserable.
I have two herniated discs and arthritis in my back and usually that doesn't bother me, but I have to look after myself in a certain way to manage it.
I hadn't been doing the right things and now I have a slipped disc, which happened last week. So far it's not really improved, and I think it's going to take a few weeks for the pain to subside.
I don't really manage set backs like this very well. I spend the days by myself and long dog walks keep my mental health under control, without that I feel very anxious and low.
I know all the common sense things like "this too shall pass" yadayada... but I tend to live in the present and find it difficult to actually imagine being pain free and moving around normally again, even though it's only really been a few days

[BFG_]

^have you ever tried one of these Merry?

https://www.amazon.com.au/Teeter-Han.../dp/B000DN7IY0

I've had one for about 5 years since having a slipped disc and it's been quite helpful. Probably not a good idea when herniated disc has just happened but I've found it good for trapped nerve problems and helping recovery later on.

[Merry]

No, though I can see how it might help..
I'm guessing that you need help with it? I wouldn't want to get stuck

[BFG_]

^you can use it on your own it's fairly easy to use once you've got it set up. There's a strap that stops it inclining further than you feel comfortable with. Start slightly inclined then eventually fully inverted.

Once you've got it balanced perfectly you can return to being upright just by moving your hands forwards.

I had horrible sciatic pain before I started using mine.

[BFG_]

^^this also helps if I'm away and can't use my inversion table thing.

[Ryan*]

Having to really confront my SA for the first time in a few years has me down. You think you're smashing it but actually your avoidance has just been on point lol.

[biscuits]

^ haha that's incredibly relatable. It's like, "oh!"

Good on you for trying things out and realising. It's good to know, I think!

[Jen.]

Been feeling awful after entering quite a bad depressive episode over the last couple of weeks. I only realised last night that it's probably because I've forgotten to start using my sunrise alarm clock this year (which I usually do as soon as September starts) so started that today, hopefully it helps to get rid of it soon.