People from the same area as you

[Orwell20]

Do you live in the house or village in which you were born? Does this make it hard for you to move on? I keep bumping into people who've known me all my life, who know what a loser I was in my teens, who know about my years of unemployment, etc. I feel like I'd be a different person if I moved 100 miles away.

[FindingFaroffrivers]

.....

[Jen.]

I live about 3 hours away from where I grew up (and over 5000 miles from where I was born lol) so no chance of bumping into anyone I knew when I was young. Although none of my friends from school stayed in that area either, and everyone I was friends with at university moved away after they graduated and I was the only one who chose to stay here. I don't know what it's like to be in your situation, but even though living somewhere else would mean you escape people judging you based on your past, being far away from everyone still comes with problems of its own. It'd probably just be replacing one thing with another.

[Jen.]

This reminds me of a comedy-drama on BBC3 a few months ago called 'Back to Life' that was about something like this. A woman moves back in with her parents after being in prison for 20 years. It's mostly about how she copes with people she grew up with judging her for her past while she's trying to move on. It was really good.

[Toxic]

I was conceived about a mile down the road in that direction *points*

From the age of about 1-16 I lived about a mile down the road in that direction *points in the other direction*

Now I'm somewhere in the middle, I've not gone far

To be fair most of the people I grew up with have vanished themselves, so me being here hasnt worked out too bad in that regard. The 2 people I got on with the most during the school years are still within a 2-3 mile radius (not that I ever really go visit)

The few friends I made during uni have literally disappeared. I know at least 2 are in Canada, one is in Australia, one went travelling around in India and I think ended up marrying a girl in Malaysia..god only knows where the others ended up..probably a few still lurking in the UK, presumably down south..thats where they all seem to go for the decent jobs!

I don't really leave the house enough to bump into people I may know...I suspect I would feel quite a lot of shame about the situation if it ever happened..but I don't think theres enough left in this town for it to happen!

[limey123]

You can't run away from yourself. I've lived in 5 different countries including the UK. Each time it was like re-branding myself to some extent. But the SA also followed me around, and making good friends wasn't always so easy.

But yes, to answer the OP, not having locals who know your weak points can certainly be an advantage.

[BritishPeace]

In a way, I as a youngser was a 'bad boy' hanging ou in gangs and such and I feel embarrassed when I see someone who I used to hang around with and are stilll in that lifestyle and I'm not. So I have to talk them like 'brap brap' and all that fake shit.

[Jane Doe]

I live still live in the town I was born in but in not in the same area. I went to school in a different town and apart from one person who I haven't seen for a while, I didn't keep in touch with anyone.

I'm invisible on the internet because I've never been on social media and that's how I like it. Nobody could find me even if they wanted to. I believe that in the future most people will regret sharing their lives online for a variety of reasons. There are some positives to social media but generally, it has been a bad idea.

I'm lucky that I don't bump into people from my past because I'd hate to be put in a position where I might be judged for my failure to properly integrate in society. The "Oh hello, what are you up to now?" questions I'd likely face, and having to listen to what they've been doing all these years fill me with dread.

[Moksha]

Originally Posted by Jane Doe

I'm invisible on the internet because I've never been on social media and that's how I like it. Nobody could find me even if they wanted to. I believe that in the future most people will regret sharing their lives online for a variety of reasons. There are some positives to social media but generally, it has been a bad idea.

I'm the same. I deliberately have no Facebook page or Twitter account, and I would NEVER put photos of myself anywhere. I don't want any of the people I went to school or college with back in my life. Most wouldn't remember me anyway, and the ones who would can be divided into those I hated and don't ever want to see again and the ones I liked but who bring back bad memories. Because I don't go on these sites, I have no idea what people look like now. I have probably stood next to a kid from school in a Tesco queue and not known who he was.

I still live in the same village in which I was born, and I drive past my old school on the way to the gym. I hate it. I dream of moving away from Essex, preferably somewhere along the south coast, like Southampton or Plymouth. But I never could. I have an ageing, widowed mother to look after. And even when she has gone I'd like to be around to keep an eye on my younger sister, who has her own problems. So I'm trapped here forever, in a place where I literally wear a hat pulled down so no one recognizes me. When I do get away, I feel like a different person. I wish I could have left when I was young. At 42 it's too late to start again anyway.

[Dougella]

^ I'm not invisible online as such but I don't have my photo as my profile picture anywhere because I prefer not to have my face staring out at people. I also don't find it necessary to post about my life or my relationship. I don't want people I went to school with to be able to search for me either. My school no longer exists, well the buildings, it was demolished and a new building was built instead
There are some lovely costal places in Essex, you could move somewhere slightly different but still close enough to be near family. And it's never too late!

[Gosties]

I'm of the same disposition as yourselves when it comes to posting online.
I've never had the thought to divulge every minute detail of my life on Twitter and Facebook.
Which is why I have never setup accounts.
I think certain things deserve to remain private and not for public consumption.
I rarely bump into people I went to school with although I still live in the same city.
I'm way past the stage of seeking approval or affirmation from any of them.

[humphrey]

I still live in the same house have done since I was 5 months old (that was when I was finally allowed to come home from the hospital). I could count on one hand how many of the people I was at school with that are still around here. I very rarely bump into anybody anyway, I have managed to hold down a full time job since I left school, 35 years ago.

I don't goon social media as when I tried it years ago it didn't have any relevance to me so I only dabbled in it for a few months, as most people structure their life around it, not being on it seems to make me invisible, which is the way I like it.

[blancmange]

Bumping into people from my past is one of my biggest hang ups. I no longer live in the places I grew up, however because I'm not very far away, I always worry I'll bump into people and they'll ask me awkward life questions. I'd like to one day do a therapy session where we role play that scenario.
There was once a time where I didn't even go into the city for fears of bumping into people but I have made progress with that recently, so hopefully onwards and upwards.

[newbs16]

^ Well done dimples, you've made amazing progress.

[Utopia]

^^ Yes, I can understand how that would be awkward, this has only happened to me a few times thankfully, but I live in Londom which seemed to have such a large and varying population and people don't often talk unless they personally know each other. One of the times it was someone from primary school but it didn't seem like their life was going that great at the time either and the other times I wasn't asked luckily.

[3stacks]

I live in the same area I was born and I don't really know that many people around here but I don't think anyone around here views me negatively really. I was popular enough at school but I was worried about running into people and then having to explain I've been doing nothing with my life but it turns out when I do run into them that since we went to one of the lowest rates schools in the city they're not doing much with their lives either. Well some are trying to be rappers.