The 30+ how are you feeling thread

[Dougella]

^

[Cairn]

Seriously where would i be without anxiety?

Dealing with the other shit.

[Dandelion10]

Feel like my boyfriend doesn't really care about me. Lent £70 to a friend, don't think I'll see it again :/ finally finished this lot of coursework (before the inevitable June lot), tutor said 'let's get you into year two' that's one of the nicest things he's ever said!

A genius friend of a friend said he would personally mentor me on programming languages. Sounds too good to be true.

[Azalea]

Sad, lonely, lost.
Missing my grandsons so much, almost 4 weeks since I saw them.

[Azalea]

^ Thanks.
Their mum likes to play silly power games

[Azalea]

^ He's under the thumb but out of the 4 of them he's the one I have least to do with.
When his dad moved out he tried to brainwash all 4 kids into siding with him and told them a pack of lies.
This son still believes everything his dad says, thankfully the others have worked it out for themselves over the years.

[dezzy94]

why are we in the club 30 to 81 it just makes me feel old and grrrr feel like p*ss

[laracroft]

^Wassup, sweetie? wanna come to poole tomorrow?

[Oddity]

^ I think you should move out and just tell your siblings: "Your turn "

[Azalea]

Fed up only being thought about when people want something.
Can't wait for everything to be over.

[challangerchris]

Originally Posted by Azalea

Fed up only being thought about when people want something.
Can't wait for everything to be over.

I understand that completely. I am the 'go to' person when it comes to fixing something. All other times I am irrelevant.

Hope you feel better about things.

Sent from my Nexus 5 using Tapatalk

[José Raúl Capablanca]

Originally Posted by Angelica

Disappointed. Received email with arrival times etc yet i've been ignored for months so why pretend to care about my birthday.

Wish I could just book a hotel or knew someone to run off with. I'm now free for four days but it's never simple with me and I probably don't deserve it given the lack of decent progress i've made since last year

Come to Bulgaria with me! I could do with somone to drive me around. You can have your own 'wing' . We fly from Bristol Airport in three hours

[anxiouslondoner]

Stressed, even though I'm off on holiday in two days I don't have the energy to look forward to it.
what a stupid, surreal week.

[Pink*Lady]

Lost, aimless, depressed and ****ed in the head.

[anxiouslondoner]

^ what's bothering you Pink Lady?

[Rocket Spud]

Frustrated, etc.

****ing BBQ's are the bane of my life. Ditto Dad's gf - she's loud, obnoxious, utter trash .. and she's sat in the garden .. i dread what the neighbors must think. And i wish i could get out of here.

I wish a stroke upon her, please. Just something to shut her the **** up

[Pink*Lady]

Originally Posted by anxiouslondoner

^ what's bothering you Pink Lady?

People giving me shit for the sake of it.

[Cheshire Cat]

Disappointed with myself, alone, out of ideas, out of energy, out of time, out of luck, knowing therapy is pointless, knowing the world is changing, knowing it is only survival of the fittest, knowing we aren't important, knowing all the nice things therapists say are lies, knowing the bullies are right, knowing there is neither good or evil, just survival, knowing children are right, knowing adults are frightened liars, knowing power and money are important, knowing respect is important, knowing young people are more important, knowing people don't care for you, knowing other people are as lost as you, knowing everything my family is (conservative, traditional) is despised by people, knowing people are jealous of your abilities, knowing when you die it will be as though you never even existed, knowing there was an answer to freedom and happiness but I was just too scared to go for it. Knowing I've screwed up, knowing I've met plenty of lovely, wonderful people but now none of them are here because I was afraid of closeness. Knowing I don't know how to love or trust people. Knowing I'm selfish. Knowing anxiety and depression aren't psychological disorders but simply emotional immaturity. Knowing it's my fault. Knowing real therapy is not paying someone and sitting on a couch but out there in the real world, confronting people, arguing, meeting, making enemies as well as friends, sticking at jobs and relationships rather than running away from them, knowing every decision I've ever made at self-preservation was the worst decision, despite what well-meaning people say, because it just leads to further illness and isolation. Knowing I'm still a child at 37. Knowing suicide is not a tragedy, and sometimes we're better off dead, knowing it gets worse, knowing the good times are in the past, knowing your family is a bunch of immature babies, knowing the WW3 is coming, knowing children don't have a future, knowing the party is over, knowing evil and fear always win, knowing 'peace and love' vigils won't defeat terrorists, knowing love lost, knowing there is no such thing as peace, knowing I am the worst human being who has existed, knowing people are sick and tired of me, knowing I hate myself, knowing I've tried everything, knowing there's no God, knowing Buddhists and enlightenment seekers are deluded, knowing happiness doesn't exist, knowing thought and consciousness are freaks and tragedies of evolution, knowing facist ideology is closer to nature than we like to admit, knowing we are the offspring of the victors in war and bloodshed, of those with the bigger guns, knowing music and art mean nothing, knowing culture means nothing, knowing the next people who move into your house will tear down what you yourself built, knowing species will die, knowing you'll never again feel the warm sand on a beach between your toes, or fall in love, or have a hug from your mum, or have an adult ask you what you want to be when you grow up, or feel excited or warm and cosy inside. Knowing you are the saddest, loneliest soul on the plant, and pray for a god to take you away quietly in your sleep.

[Pink*Lady]

Despondent.

[Pink*Lady]

Hopeful - I have two job interviews coming up so fingers crossed. Even if I'm unsuccessful it doesn't matter because at least I'm making the effort. I can't stay where I am any more. It's crap being ignored all day.

[Indigo_]

Best of luck Pink*Lady

[Norris]

Starting therapy (for the 3rd time). Feel kinda shitty but hopefully with just enough level of motivation to be therapised.

[Norris]

^ Yeah things are well with her, just thinking of the future makes me anxious (I'm not working much at the moment). Plus she's way too sociable for my liking :P

How are you? happy about Portugal winning?

[Pink*Lady]

Thanks Hellosunshine and Biscuits. Was bitch stared at in work today by groups of people. No idea why. Anyone would think I'd murdered someone. **** I can't get out of there fast enough.

[Norris]

^^ Yeah I thought they had an outside chance before the tournament started but then I watched them in the group stages and didn't rate them at all! it's a funny old game.

Hope the cold goes soon, I had that sort of thing a couple of weeks ago, it's a bugger (though mine was worse obviously cos I'm a man).

[Azalea]

Hope it goes ok Angelica.

I feel sad, lonely and had enough of life.
Can't wait for it all to be over.
Every morning I wake up disappointed that I've woken up and have to endure another day.

[Mo34]

^
Take care Azalea.

^^
Hope it goes OK Angelica.

[Azalea]

Been on antidepressants for years, recently had them increased again and on a waiting list for more therapy.
I still rarely sleep so that doesn't help.
Thanks for hugs both of you.

[Northern Natterer]

Fed up of feeling like an outsider all the time and not being able to do anything about it.

[Azalea]

Originally Posted by Northern Natterer

Fed up of feeling like an outsider all the time and not being able to do anything about it.

That's how I always feel, like I don't belong anywhere.