Laughing at jokes.

[Lainey]

I was on a training course last week and during a break the two trainers who were quite talkative types were recounting what they thought were funny stories about their experiences working with elderly people. They were not meaning to be nasty in any way and in fact some of what they were talking about was quite amusing. However, I found myself at times forcing laughter so that my jawbone was aching ! Afterwards I thought to myself what do you do in a situation where either you don't find something funny but everyone else is laughing along, or in fact you are not in the mood for a laugh. Myself I tend to laugh along with everyone else whether I feel like it or not, just to fit in. The downside of this though, is that if it's not genuine laughter it can be a real effort. What do you do ?

[pinkmoon]

The worst thing is when you dont get the joke but laugh anyway and they see through this and sadistically ask you to explain why you thought it was funny.

Yes, I hate being told a joke and then the person waiting for my reaction, which is usually forced laughter. I don't like the way it makes me the centre of attention.

I think this raises some very interesting questions on the nature of humour - such as

Why do we find things 'funny'?

What is the motivation behind 'telling a joke'?

On the face of it - not laughing if you don't find someting funny is the only sensible course if you are to be true to yourself, on the other hand - a shared joke is one of the ways that humans create common 'bonds' - which seems to be on the whole what we strive for. So by not 'joining in' we feel bad, in that we percieve ourselves to be not 'engaging' and quite possibly the joke teller will also feel bad - since they may percieve their attempt at 'engagement' rejected.

An example of how the seemingly 'right' action - i.e. not laughing if it isn't funny - leads to what appears to me the least advantageous outcome - in terms of 'mutual understanding'.

My brain hurts...

On a wholly practical level - a possible counter to:

The worst thing is when you dont get the joke but laugh anyway and they see through this and sadistically ask you to explain why you thought it was funny.

might be either to hit them with the heavy psychology of why people have a tendency to want to fit in - and watch them slip into unconsciousness or perhaps - something like 'as it's your joke - why don't you explain why it is funny?'. 'Course - you'll have to be quick with these before the self doubt gets a chance to grab hold...

SoundMan

[pboy]

I just do fake laughter, I don't care if they can tell. Everyone finds different things funny.
Mind you if it were loads of others laughing at something vs. me not finding it funny, I wouldnt enjoy it.

[SpaceMonkey]

I cant actually laugh in front of people..its like a mental block i have.

I can laugh much too annoyingly and loudly when im alone but in front of someone i just feel too embassased to laugh and just end up putting on a big smile even if i found it genually funny. Probably looks like im faking it even though im not but i dont really care

[tigerbanana]

I think if there's more than three people there, you don't really need to laugh, it's enough just to smile, the only time I find it's really awkward is when there's basically just you and the person making the joke. My problem is sometimes that I laugh too much though. If you laugh too much will people think you're an idiot? :embarass:

[miffy]

Originally Posted by tigerbanana

My problem is sometimes that I laugh too much though. If you laugh too much will people think you're an idiot? :embarass:

I don't think that there's much need to worry about laughing too hard - people are self indulgent and the more you laugh the better they will feel. Unless of course you start to double up and bang your fists on the table at a slightly humorous remark, in which case there is probably some cause for worry.