woot! my 1st counselling sesh went well

Kevin Hodge · #1 22nd May 2006, 20:03

pah...i was really stressing out about this. you know when you get scared and then there's this feeling like a grey clamp on your brain and you can just feel all your energy getting sucked away? you can't concentrate and you just get frozen...that was me for about two hours preceding the appointment.

once i got in it was still nerve-wracking and uncomfortable, but at the same time it felt really good to talk about all my problems instead of them just being this thing in my head that makes me feel really alienated from everyone else. and i thought that at least i could say to the counsellor 'this is why my voice is quavering and i'm getting all agitated' and know that it's their job to actually help with these things.

after the initial elation of feeling like someone had understood something about me for a change, i started to realise that i have no idea how or if this is going to change things for me, but nonetheless, i feel pretty positive about it. just feeling a bit zapped now, my head's really being working hard.

got another appointment in two weeks and i'm actually rather looking forward to it

.

i just thought it would be good to post about this experience as so many people dread their first appointment, it would be good to show that it can be really positive.

threadbare · #2 22nd May 2006, 20:41

hey - well done for getting up the courage to do this sullenskink. counselling helped me through a particularly rough time, i think because i felt i was going insane not being able to compare the contents of my head with another human being who could validate them and tell me it was ok to be thinking and feeling what i was. it can be very draining and challenging, but it sounds like you are taking some real positive steps to confront your issues. hope you will continue to get loads out of it.

#3 22nd May 2006, 21:03

Well done!

Kevin Hodge · #4 22nd May 2006, 21:25

thanks threadbare and introguy!

yeah, this certainly is a way of confronting my issues. my only concern is that you only get so many appointments, so i'm sure i'll start feeling that the clock is ticking. but anyway, this is certainly a good start.

Paul · #5 22nd May 2006, 22:14

Well done

it is probably best if you don't think to much about how it is going to change you. Just keep on going. You will change yourself. You just start to see things more clearly, that's all I'm going to say.

Kevin Hodge · #6 22nd May 2006, 22:40

thanks paul, that sounds hopeful

Winnie57 · #7 22nd May 2006, 23:03

That's very encouraging sullenskink. I have an assessment session on Friday. Your experience tells me I don't have to worry too much.

Kevin Hodge · #8 22nd May 2006, 23:16

Quote:

Originally Posted by Winnie57

That's very encouraging sullenskink. I have an assessment session on Friday. Your experience tells me I don't have to worry too much.

is that the initial thing, your first session? that's what i just had, if so.

think about it - if you become aware that you are showing some symptom you find embarassing, why not just stop and explain what's happening? that's just another one of your problems that they are there to help with.

during the session, i actually brought up how my voice was cracking and quavering because it was really weird to finally get to talk about these really strong feelings, and i also talked about how agitated and sort of hyper i aws getting too. i find that actually getting it out in the open stopped my thoughts snowballing, it helped release the tension.

anyway, i know not everyone has it as good as me, i can see very easily that lots of people wuold be so anxious that they'd totally freeze up. i thought i'd just say what it was like for me though, in case it might help someone.

good luck winnie!

Winnie57 · #9 22nd May 2006, 23:18

Thanks Sullenskink. Yes it is my first session. I'm not going primarily for SA, more for depression and family problems but I'm sure SA will rear its ugly head.
Thanks for the tips and all the best for your future sessions.

fairyfingers · #10 23rd May 2006, 00:30

Well done

infinity · #11 23rd May 2006, 10:46

Well done, Sullenskink :roundnrou
I had counselling a while ago, and it really helps to talk about all the stuff going on inside your head and decompress all of those thoughts and feelings. Keep it up!

Kevin Hodge · #12 24th May 2006, 14:42

just 'BIG-UPPING' my exeprience of the postive effects of counselling.

today i was moaning at my manager about how much stress i am under at work. while i was moaning...well, it's usually quite hard to bring out these feelings as i just feel like noone ever understands or that i'll sound like some sort of hysterical loon, (and act like one), and i don't want everyone to know how mental my life is...but today, i was reminded of being at the counsellors, where i WAS able to get someone to understand me face to face...i wouldn't say i said exactly what i felt to my manager (i want to keep my job!), but i did feel like because i had spoken to a counsellor, talking about my feelings wasn't uncharted territory. so i said a lot more than i would have usually.

having had a good moan, the boss has taken lots of pressure off me and we are spending a day this week just working out what to do about by moans! of cuorse this will involve having to talk to her, but at least i can prepare for that.

result!

and of course, thanks to all the well-wishers. good luck with your own challenges and achievements. don't get worn down!

firewoman · #13 24th May 2006, 17:22

Good on you. It's hard to stick up for yourself at work (well for me anyway). Sounds like your manager is going to be supportive, which is nice.

Kevin Hodge · #14 24th May 2006, 18:31

Quote:

Originally Posted by firewoman

Good on you. It's hard to stick up for yourself at work (well for me anyway). Sounds like your manager is going to be supportive, which is nice.

oh boy, don't start me on that one! my boss is, i'm sure, far more nuts than i am. she is understanding sometimes, but other times she flips out at you, because she's just a nutter basically, she's really erratic. but anyway, at least if i let her know all my moans, whenever something goes wrong i can say 'don't say you weren't warned...'