How is everyone feeling? (31)

[Mo34]

Originally Posted by Percy

You're older than me (although you don't look a day over 18).

I wish that both I was 18 and that I still looked it!
But thank you kindly

[Percy]

Just sucking up to a senior mod.

[hellotiger]

Originally Posted by Percy

Do you think you might be bipolar?

No but my mum thought I was. No I have borderline personality disorder and I get mood swings. It’s alright, it’s manageable, until it’s not.

[Percy]

I didn't know you have borderline, that can't be much fun. Would explain the low mood though.

[Dougella]

^It's weird that modern toilets seem to have got smaller but people in general are getting bigger, and plumbing doesn't seem to be nearly as strong as it used to be. I used to live in a house that was built in the 50s and even with six people using one bathroom we never had a problem with the toilet, that plumbing was strong!

[Dougella]

^ A cynical Susan I think it might have something to do with trying to save water, but it ends up with people needing to flush modern toilets multiple times anyway.

[Dougella]

^ Yes indeed, we had a leak in ours and we didn't realise until we had a higher than normal water bill.

[Tubbs]

Tired and a bit crummy. Wondering whether to have a bubble bath; half thinking of going for a walk in the rain. I love rain.

[Amara 94]

Like I am longing for simpler times. Even with music, pre-soundcloud days where it was just listening and exploring music for fun and not reposting or anything. My music taste was probably more outdated then, as to current music, but maybe more unique.

[Toxic]

I'm so annoyed and ashamed

A few of us from work went out on friday. I spent friday night vomiting and all of yesterday feeling like I was about to die and couldn't even keep a mouthful of water down.

I've not done the post drinking vomit game for about 15 years.

It probably doesnt help I'm still on tablets and I've not touched alcohol in a good year.

I dread to think what I've done/said..I don't even remember getting home, this is the sort of shit you pull as a teenager, not in your 30's

[Dougella]

^ Aw, don't feel to bad, you obviously paid for it afterwards! Depending on what medication you're on it might have made your reaction to alcohol a lot worse?

[Toxic]

^ / ^^

Maybe..I mean clearly we all had a similar mindset because it was an eye watering bill at the end (to which my card got declined and I have no idea why)

I'm just annoyed, I had 3 days off work this weekend and I've completely lost one..I couldn't really do anything more than vaguely watch youtube.

Sigh, it's my own stupid fault, no one forced me to do it..just thought I was past being a numpty

[Consolida]

^ Aww text your sister and tell her how awful you are feeling and let her phone you back. You couldn't feel worse than you already feel so talking to your sister will only leave you feeling the same or far more likely you will feel a little bit comforted and relieved that you've confided in someone who loves you xx

Take care Nanuq

[limey123]

Sorry you're feeling so rubbish, Nanuq. Wish there was something we could tangibly do to help. Long Covid really sucks (my sister and bro-in-law are suffering from it, it's hit their breathing, too). But I believe the medical people are starting to learn about it, so hopefully they'll very soon be able to help you more. Sending hugs your way!

[Mo34]

^ hope you start to feel better Nanuq


I'm so tired. I'm glad it's a bank holiday, wouldn't have fancied work today. Just had a snooze on the sofa, with the cat waking me up for some food

[Professor Willow]

I'm feeling uncharacteristically aggressive today and I don't know why. It's not a nice feeling and I wish it would go away.

[Consolida]

^ Hormones? Something you've eaten? A full moon? Frustrated with life?

I hope the feeling soon passed and you now feel more relaxed

[Mo34]

Still tired
Took my car in and had to get the bus back. I'm starting work in 7 mins so just made it..
Got supervision, pdp , training, drop in and then straight after my counselling session. Definitely won't be picking the car up today me thinks.

Quite fancy just going back to bed tbh.

[Consolida]

^ I hope your day is turning out to be a much better one than you thought it would Mo

I'm feeling awful and haven't even got out of bed
I'm focusing on all that is wrong in my life and the world rather than on all that is good. But that's how it goes with depression I suppose. I've started to dwell again on how thoroughly disappointing my search for my birth family turned out to be. I wasn't prepared for the fact that they wouldn't be remotely interested in me although I can't think why because it's the story of my life when it comes to people. Definitely having a woe is me day

[Percy]

Hope you feel better soon consolida.

[Blackflies]

Awful. My mum has no respect for my privacy constantly in my room moving things whenever I’m not in there. She’s known I have OCD all my life and it’s beyond her to just give me any personal space. I feel like my choice to be private has and always will be devalued. I feel pretty out of control at the moment anyway without her adding to it by removing what sense of control I do have. She’s also been telling our relatives private things despite me asking her not to. I just hate that I can’t be open with what I say or be liberated to leave my safe space undisturbed because I know it won’t be. She knows how I feel but ignores it anyway. It’s a trivial thing but I’ve struggled with it since I was a child. She was informed the reasoning by psychologists and to this disregards it. It suffocates me.

I feel triggered today also by someone’s social unawareness. Constantly messaging if they’re irritating me, if we can meet despite me blanking or insinuating I have stuff going on. I don’t but the point is the invasive feeling it brings. I probably should block but I don’t have a reason to. But not doing so leads to feeling impolite. I just can’t imagine doing the same behaviour back yet I’m always the odd ball with most associates. I feel like I’m more socially aware than half these people I talk to yet I’m always the one with behavioural issues.

[Mo34]

Hope you feel better Consolida

Originally Posted by Consolida

^ I hope your day is turning out to be a much better one than you thought it would Mo

Oh I wish. Just had an intense drop in, where people came a long at a staggered pace, either upset, panic attack, having issues with other service users, low mood. Normally it's quite jolly. Today was draining managing it all.

No phone call about my car. don't know if that's good news or bad. :/

[twosocks]

Relieved and content. Having eye contact with someone in my personal space can give me a panicky deer in the headlights feeling, it's something i thought i would always contend with for the rest of my life and recently not only has that feeling not occured but i've even felt comfortable and relaxed.
I could air punch at having an actual example of connecting with someone without me getting too spooked.
It's one of those one small steps for man but giant leap situations. I just hope i remind myself of it being possible if it comes back.

[Consolida]

^ Nice one twosocks


Thank you everyone for the kind feedback to my previous post.

[biscuits]

^^ aww, that was lovely to read, twosocks

^ Oh, Consolida, so sorry that things are hard with your sisters at the moment. It must be such a difficult thing to navigate the behavioural rules/boundaries for you all and must be bumpy at times.

I don't mean this disrespectfully to your sisters, but damn... they really have no idea what they're missing out on!

I hope it continues to go well with the sister that you feel more connected to

[Consolida]

^ Aw thank you, as always, for your kind words Biscuits

[Ben]

^ Hugs NeverWas.


Hope you have someone you can speak too

[Blackflies]

^^

Hope you'll be okay and find some form of contentment.

Originally Posted by Kooky Monster

^^ People who don't respect your boundaries, especially when you spell it out to them, are beyond infuriating. Sorry you're having to deal with that, Blackflies

Thankyou for your kindness. I can laugh about it later but in the moment it always feels like such a violation. Plus there never seems to be anything in between being polite and irrational. I'll try to be as polite as I can but then it gets to a point of turning into a loon for 5 minutes.

[biscuits]

Really strange. This week my anxieties have been really bad and I’ve been waking up at about 3am with worries and struggling to eat food. This evening I managed to eat a meal and was really pleased about that, but my stomach is not so pleased. I’ve got really bad cramps :/. Why don’t you want food inside of you?

I just feel really weird and floaty... like the normal part of me has shrunk down to the size of pea and it’s floated to the top of my head and the rest of me feels really strange. Not sure how else to describe it!

[Consolida]

^^ You've described it very well Biscuits

It's been an incredibly difficult year and I think it would be strange if we didn't suffer with bouts of feeling mentally and physically awful. Stress is so toxic and it can take a long time for the body to start feeling okay again. Continue to try and eat small nourishing meals when you can and spend lots of time chilling out with your fur babies and this time will pass x


I'm feeling very sore. I walked on the treadmill for an hour earlier as quite clearly inactivity isn't doing my legs any favours but now I feel even more achey so I'm going to take some painkillers and distract myself with a film.